sarah-elizabethWhisper

25 / F / American
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Dear JustinYou're selfish. / You're a cheater and a liar. / You're manipulative.
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WantedYes, we were drunk. Yes, I came home with you. Yes, we fucked. / You put your arm around me. While we slept, your hand was right there on my leg; your naked body next to mine. The subtle touch told me you were glad that I stayed the night. It told me that you wanted me. And isn't that what we are all looking for -- to want someone and love someone and to be loved and wanted in return? / It has been a long time since I had last felt wanted like that. I'm not usually a "stay the night" kind of girl. It's better that way... safer, even. If I don't stay, there isn't time to feel wanted -- a feeling one could get used to. If I don't stay, there isn't time to get attached. Because everyone always leaves, right?
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GoodbyeThe night we met / Was a regular masquerade / With a gentle snow
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Midnight Subconscioushis smell still lingers / not enough to comfort / pain worsens
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What I did WrongI can put on a smile and pretend that I'm alright / But nothing could describe what I really feel inside / Everything seems normal
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Don't Let Me RunHe used to come over and we'd fuck. / Then he would leave, / to go see her.
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broken37 seconds / that's all it took before I hung up the phone / that's all it took for me to see that you didn't care
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Through the Looking GlassI'm an outsider / Watching something so familiar / Yet something so distant
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WaitingEvery night I wait / I wait for your call / Your voice
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Bottled up (prose)They say if you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything. But I've run out of nice things to say to you. It's time for me to stop lying and pretending and start being real. And that might mean I'm not always nice. It's my turn. After all of this, I deserve to be selfish for a moment and let all of this off my chest. / I loved you. I have for years, and I'm afraid I always will. Your first love just isn't something that goes away. But you lied and manipulated, and played all kinds of games. And I'm saying no. I can finally say no. I can't put myself through it anymore, and I shouldn't have to. It's not fair. Everything isn't just about you. Your actions affect those that are around you, and I can't take it any longer. I'm not going to be your way out, and I'm not going to let you use me. Find someone else.
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