I wake up, with a cut in my lip,
After winning a battle, I can't think of.
I feel pressure from my grip,
That I held shaking until the sun came up.
You begin to feel the weight of burden,
Fall onto those you hold dear,
Sometimes I've come to notice,
People don't want to deal with it.
I can't bring myself to do basics,
It glares at me like a blank slate.
I can't bare to look at my reflection,
And remember who it used to be.
Life will get better in time,
Time heals all wounds,
But the more time I've wasted,
the more I hate being born.
I miss my independence,
The days I once felt free.
Because now I'm overly reliant,
And nobody wants me.
Apr 11
Apr 11, 2026 at 1:42 AM UTC
I can't say it enough,
to remove the guilt I feel.
There's so much self-hatred,
that you shouldn't have to feel.
I only ever wanted to get better,
but I kept getting worse.
I wanted to change,
but I watched myself become my fears
Please, listen to my screams,
please, listen to my pleas,
can't you stop this tyranny?
This tyranny.
please, negotiate with me.
can we find our peace?
away from this tyranny.
your tyranny.
You only want best for your people,
but you left them all to drown.
you want to see yourself on a pedestal,
but you just keep letting them down.
Can't you see you killed the good,
that was left in my soul?
Please, listen to my screams,
please, listen to my pleas,
can't you stop this tyranny?
This tyranny.
please, negotiate with me.
can we find our peace?
away from this tyranny.
your tyranny.
You held all the knowledge I knew,
about the cruel world that I homed,
and their unforgiving souls.
You gave me power and intuition,
ambition and a temper,
that I can't control.
No! Listen to my screams,
listen to my pleas,
Stop this tyranny?
your tyranny.
No! no negotiation or truce.
you've bent our truths.
Into tyranny.
your tyranny.
Feb 19
Feb 19, 2026 at 7:13 PM UTC
I, feel so small, inside of my shell,
Hidden away from any light at all,
Curled up so tight trying to hold on.
I, feel like a malfunctioned machine,
Living with no purpose or feeling,
Trying hard to do anything I can grasp.
They don't want to hear how I'm feeling,
Especially when I'm not happy enough.
So I just pretend to be fine,
Disassociate and hide.
You show the worst in me,
It's making me sick as can be.
I need to untangle all my mind,
So I can finally sleep at night.
You show the worst in me,
Bringing back my anxiety.
You make me feel like a sick twisted dream.
There are dragons eating,
The eyes of my soul.
There are memories being burnt,
For traumatic new ones.
You've rewired up my brain,
Clogged my memory, started a chain,
Of pure destruction like I'm some kind of monster.
They don't want to hear how I'm feeling,
Especially when I'm not happy enough.
You show the worst in me,
It's making me sick as can be.
I need to untangle all my mind,
So I can finally sleep at night.
You show the worst in me,
Bringing back my anxiety.
You make me feel like a sick twisted dream
Don't abuse my trust,
Don't abuse my care.
Don't you even think either,
That you can abuse my friends.
Because every single person has a beast,
And mine is one best not to meet.
You show the worst in me,
It's making me sick as can be.
I need to untangle all my mind,
So I can finally sleep at night.
You show the worst in me,
Bringing back my anxiety.
You make me feel like a sick twisted dream
You show the worst in me,
It's making me angrier to see.
I need to unravel all my thoughts,
So I can finally thrive at life.
You show the worst in me,
Bringing back my anxiety.
You make me feel like,
You make me feel like,
You make me feel like, darkness.
Feb 19
Feb 19, 2026 at 7:13 PM UTC
We move these boxes,
so we can start anew.
We plan our footprints,
and every move.
We hope for tomorrow,
will be better than today.
We hope for tomorrow,
to not be far away.
Pain in your footsteps,
and every move.
Your anger comes flashing,
through a fluctuating mood.
We hope for tomorrow,
we can fix our wounds.
We hope for tomorrow,
we can start anew.
I am aware of the noise my strings bring,
an empty yet almost silencing scream.
I am aware for all that I know,
makes me not smarter, just older after all.
For I am a fool hanging down,
with my mistakes in hand.
For I understand a new look into,
my words and new beginnings.
I dream for tomorrow's call,
it's all I can do after all,
the pain and hurt we feel.
I pray for tomorrow to be here.
A fresh start to the dawn,
holds potential in my hands,
it won't erase all that's done,
but I can start again.
For tomorrow is a promise,
one I'm yet to keep.
tomorrow is the promise,
I make to me.
And my self discovery will come to end,
the solitude of my mind will feel peace again.
For the noise that haunted me from my own birth,
has given me new wisdom to cure my sorrow.
I am aware of the noise my strings bring,
an empty yet almost silencing scream.
I am aware for all that I know,
makes me not smarter, just older after all.
For I am a fool hanging down,
with my mistakes in hand.
For I understand a new look into,
my words and new beginnings.
I dream for tomorrow's call,
it's all I can do after all,
the pain and hurt we feel.
I pray for tomorrow to be here.
Feb 19
Feb 19, 2026 at 7:12 PM UTC
When the words I say leave my mouth,
but never reach your ears,
it exhausts me,
to keep trying to speak.
When the feelings overwhelm me,
and my body starts to shake,
it makes me fearful,
of what I'm yet to be.
And I ripped my self-esteem to shreds,
as well as my confidence and ego-head.
I tore every part of what I loved,
about being a person,
under the female gaze.
I built palaces in my mind despite it being a mess,
I spent months sleeping on a broken bed,
I fight and fight all my anger suppressed inside,
why do men always like, to hurt and lie?
While I was drowning you didn't see,
you just saw every other being.
I'm not saying to forget,
the people in your lives,
though I'd beg for you to try.
While I hated my reflection daily,
you called another woman pretty,
when I felt less and less,
you kept making more mistakes,
saying "oops it's okay!".
And I ripped my self esteem to shreds,
comparing myself to every single one of them.
Where is the connection?
people are so shallow,
We've become so transactional.
I built palaces in my mind despite it being a mess,
I spent months sleeping on a broken bed,
I fight and fight all my anger suppressed inside,
why do men always like, to hurt and lie?
I have thought daily on the blood flowing down,
from the love on my sleeves to my heart.
I wondered how ironic it would be to see,
me dye my hair red with all this agony!
I built palaces in my mind despite it being so alone,
I spent months sleeping on a broken bed,
crying and not letting go.
I fight and fight all my anger suppressed inside,
some days I wished I had died,
back when I was hurt,
just so I don't have to live anymore.
anymore.
anymore.
anymore.
I built palaces in my mind despite it being a mess...
Feb 19
Feb 19, 2026 at 7:08 PM UTC
So now I wanted to drink iced americano,
in the sun thinking of the man who loved me.
who really turned out to want to use my body.
But it's not like we didn't agree,
that that was all it was.
Even though I fell in love,
I truly thought, I'd... change your mind.
Now it's your birthday and I'm here at home,
I found someone new, so I can heal the hole .
It's crazy how much can happen in a year,
If everything didn't happen, would I be here?
I kept swinging back and forth,
on all these thoughts.
Even couples on the TV,
talked like us.
But they're not realistic,
They're only just fiction.
I know I should let go,
it's time to close the door.
I'm finally standing still,
observing it all.
I just fell in love so fast,
should I pay crimes for that?
I know I should let it go,
but I cried to my favourite songs,
Thinking I'd shut them off completely,
But now I'm obsessed with the bands.
I thought I'd cry forever,
about us not being together.
But I know, I've changed my mind.
It wasn't love this time...
Feb 19
Feb 19, 2026 at 6:50 PM UTC
I used to love the shade of red,
My lipstick, my dress and scrunchie in my hair.
But as I've grown, my colours fade,
Now the only red I see drips from my skin.
I thought I'd always be a vintage queen,
I'm stuck here feeling like a modern nightmare.
Mar 22, 2025
Mar 22, 2025 at 9:54 PM UTC
You want me to be the best,
You've ever seen.
So now you've began,
To suffocate me.
Violently, slowly, sadly unknowingly,
Amongst the water I drown,
With my ambitions as well.
Mar 13, 2025
Mar 13, 2025 at 5:39 PM UTC
When you want me to be great,
You overanalyze everything I say.
You want everything for me,
So I suffocate every insecurity of mine,
Until I force a fake smile.
When you want me to be happy everyday,
I feel numb and ashamed,
Of my skin, body and time,
But of my ****** up life.
You can't force me to grin,
When life has done nothing but,
Stab my skin repeatedly,
Ruthlessly and recklessly.
When you want me to be great,
Just look me in the eye and say,
You want me to be great in "your way",
Not the way that I will make for myself.
Mar 3, 2025
Mar 3, 2025 at 11:10 AM UTC
I won't be everything you want,
I can't be everything you need.
As we grow our ideals change dear,
Can't you love me,
for what I can bring?
Jan 3, 2025
Jan 3, 2025 at 1:02 PM UTC