What ive come to realise is that no matter how much you document. How many photos you take. Or moments of silence you spend. The memory of their touch, mannerisms and things you saw on the daily is only at the end of the day a memory.
I miss you both everyday, You made my childhood complete. It seems so long ago yet so far. The unconditional love you both gave to me. The times you brought the family together in moments of despair. Im grateful to you both completely.
Your deaths were both destroying.
I think of you in my photos.
I smell your presence even though it’s been years.
I don’t know if you’re with me still. I don’t know if your spirits lies with me. But I do know that the time we spent together was meaningful and that means more to me than any promise of an afterlife.
Thank you. I hope one day our atoms find each other somewhere in the universe.
Apr 15
Apr 15, 2026 at 7:25 AM UTC
If you told my 16 year old self that in only 2 years your name would be my world. I’d be terrified.
The knowing that my future self never gave up on his pursuit to be loved.
Truly. With no strings attached.
Not being used as a placeholder before a real relationship leaving me wondering when my time to love will be.
All I ever wanted was to share my soul with someone else. To understand the words in love songs, poems and stories written by lovestruck people since the dawn of humanity.
To most of all, make this life make sense. Make my existence more meaningful.
You make this life make sense. You are the part of my soul that I’ve been searching for hopelessly to make me feel like the boy whose smile never fell.
But it scares me. Trusting you the way I do. Knowing the irreversible damage that would happen if you left. I’m caught in a weird dance between awe, fear and genuine optimism towards our future.
Please don’t break me down like the others but instead let us both break down the walls we have held up at the cost of our health.
There are times where the worry’s come back.
“Would she cheat?”
“Has she been honest?”
“Is she losing feelings?”
“Is this where she tells me it won’t work?”
Each being echoes from my past. Like it’s a reminder that I should never lay down my defence.
Like I should never let myself fall fully for you.
Like I’m scared to jump into a freezing bath.
But with your reassurance, your love, your devotion to me. I can slowly submerge into the bath of our love.
Mar 25
Mar 25, 2026 at 2:40 PM UTC
How are you supposed to deal with overthinking and boundaries?
To ask her to not do something for my own benefit or security feels like I’m a bad boyfriend. I don’t wanna be that guy. There’s so much at risk if it goes wrong.
I’m uncomfortable with lots of things you do or wanna do. Lots of things I’ve never told you before. What kind of guy would I be to stop you from doing these things? But it would make me feel so much better about myself and us. Is this normal?
It makes me feel weak. That I’m even worried about this in the first place. You don’t put boundaries on me. So why should I do it for you. Are we both in the same boat? Afraid of being the one to put limits down?
I admit it’s become my greatest worry. The thought of stopping you from being the person you want to be would be my greatest failure. I don’t want my overthinking to be the end of us. I hate it when I keep asking if we are ok. One day I feel you’ll become sick of me being repetitive. But I can’t escape this cycle of this feeling.
You are my world. It would be stupid to start putting borders down because of my stupid past.
Mar 19
Mar 19, 2026 at 1:58 PM UTC
I miss you
I miss living with you
I miss stealing your music
I miss sharing a room with you
I miss waking you up with coffee
I miss talking until our eyes gave up
I miss how calm you made the house feel
I often reminisce,
Getting lost in conversation, losing track of time
Our conversations ranging from deep talks to the silliest of things
Laughter echoes in the halls of my mind of these times
All of my greatest memories include you and i wouldn't have it any other way
You are my biggest inspiration
I'm so happy for you and proud of the future you've built for yourself
Growing up with you is the biggest privilege I have
You shaped me into the person I am today and I am forever grateful
I'm glad I have you
Mar 18
Mar 18, 2026 at 8:01 PM UTC
This past week has been one of the scariest weeks of my life.
The thought of losing you over my own insecurities and distrust from past relationships. I thought the past would repeat and my soul crushed over my weaknesses.
I’ve been so hardwired to expect the worst, don’t trust 100% but I realised that I must be better to you.
This week has changed me, changed us in the best way possible. It made me realise that we don’t have to only show our good sides in order for our love to work.
It shows that we aren’t the same people we were in the past, but the embodiment of growth. The mistakes we made that caused the argument or the mistakes made in reaction are the past bottled up and hidden in hopes our weaknesses aren’t found out by the other.
The worry is still there, the worry of failing you and failing the girl that I’ve been devoting my life to will end over childish arguments. I know how hard you are trying to care for me. Opening up about your past that always seemed like a distant memory will never go ignored.
You are safe with me.
The past isn’t who you are now.
Only the shadow of the girl who endured so much pain with no support in a world that you didn’t think wanted you here.
But I want you here. I am yours and you are mine always and forever.
I love you.
Mar 14
Mar 14, 2026 at 6:16 AM UTC
I spent so long thinking being alone was the better option, as if it was something superior to company. Only now is it i realise i crave your closeness and your touch, your presence makes me feel like a dog with two tails. I will forever be grateful for every fraction of your time i am so lucky to be graced with. With you i feel whole, like you are an extension of myself. A reflection of oneself. A mirror of my soul.
Feb 22
Feb 22, 2026 at 6:05 PM UTC