ever say it's just been one of those days
but you won't expain what you mean
cause you know it will hurt the people around you
I did yesterday
I just wanted to be alone all night
but I had to work
and I wanted to bawl like a baby
but it is NOT okay to cry in front of people
so I cried myself to sleep
alone up in my room
so no one could see my weakness
and no one could see me
craddeled up in a ball
cause I had too much pain
to want to care about anyone at all
I wanted to die
I couldn't though
so I cried, cried, cried until all the pain was out of me
but see that didn't last long
it came back
why does God hate me
why do I have so much pain inside
that never seems to permanatly leave
I don't wanna be like this
it ain't my goal in life
to feel like... this
I dont know what I feel
so I can't really explain
but ****** it's back again and it needs to go
but it won't see
it is like a blood ******* demon
who has attached itself to me
and it won't leave
so I fix pain with pain
but not a blade
hot water on the skin
stings just enough
to take my mind off the pain inside
cause it is on the outside