The man lives such a life,
that the sun is his wife

He sits on the stair,
watching as she brushed
love through her hair

The trees whisper of her beauty,
and the wind heads echos of her voice

Chills run through the grass,
for summer has taken its mass.

Help me find
an escape

I need
a reason to live
a reason to love

Help me escape from
my anxiety
the pain
the guilt
the sorrow
the judgment
the everything

let me live
without being present

and let me die
without the heartbreak.

My music
blares softly
through the speakers

My feet,
cold
against my wood floors

I stand at my window
wondering,
are you looking
at the moon too?

Or are you asleep
Or maybe you’re just ignoring my text
that I sent to you
hours ago

I wonder,
why did you stop loving me
when,
how,
was it me?

I bet it was me.

Hey,

When'd you forget about me? When did I become a ghost to you?

I loved you every second of every day, even after we broke up. I still cry over you, and I still miss you. And I can't help but to think that you are perfectly okay and happy without me, but with your new girlfriend. Do you two love each other like we did? Do you love her more than you loved me? Or is she just a rebound? What's gonna happen during the summer? Are you going to go to the places you went with me? Is she going to stay on your left or right side? Because as far as I know, I was the only one to always hold your right hand and stay on your right side.

I still dream of driving to the Red Granite Quarry with you. One hand on the wheel and the other holding my hand. We have all the windows down and are blasting our favorite music. I dream of all the things we used to do, even if it was as simple as laying in the road in the middle of the night to stare at the stars.

I guess that's all I have to say for now. If I ever send you a letter, I'll add in a piece of your favorite gum.

                 <3 Emma
       sent with love, always and forever

A stranger
A crush
A friend
A lover
My lover
My heartbreak
My man not in the mirror

The places we met in the dark look different in the day,
As if they had never been places at all...

I thought,
getting rid of
everything with you in it
and not having to see it
would make it
easier to forget you

but it didn’t
it made it harder
I need to talk to you,
ask you questions,
apologize,
but I can’t
because my phone
has no memory of
You.
But I do.

I thought I knew
your phone number by heart
and maybe your social media name,
was engraved below your number

but it isn’t
because my mind
did everything it could
to erase you

I thought I could forget you,
but I can’t.

We lay here for hours,
Limbs tangled
Attached

The hunger to be closer eats away at our hearts
Every night is a surrender to the moon,
We take shelter under the stars
From the monsters down the hall

I lay here for days,
Body cold
Broken

The pain of the heartbreak rips at the eyes
Tears stream down my face,
I hide under the covers
From the evil in my head.

I know
how much you must hate me
right now
you have plenty of reasons to be,
and honestly,
I would be mad
and annoyed too
if I were you

because I still have
your phone number
written down

yet even after all this time
I could never
bring myself to throw it away

and for some reason,
I still care about you,
yet I know that I shouldn’t.

So go ahead,
be mad at me
walk away from me.

But when you’re beaten down
and heartbroken,
don’t come running back to me
looking for comfort,
because you won’t find it
in me.

let me into
your heart
its beating
is unnatural

let me fix it
with my tinkering tools,
and super glue

your heart will be
as good as new,
because i have given my heart
to you

but it looks as though,
you have broken mine too

you return to me
me heart in pieces
hearts,
i have learned
cannot be fixed
no matter how strong the glue,
of love is.

Someone I decided to love
He was a mistake
That I would make time and time
Again.
He stripped me of my pain,
And dressed me in that warm fuzzy feeling.
He drenched sunlight on me,
As if he believed I was worthy of it.
He showed me so many things,
And then nothing.

Someone I decided to love
Gave me a pretty box with a bow
yet it was empty.
"You want to give me emptiness?"
"Yes, my love, that's what I have left."
He brought tears to my eyes.

Someone I decided to love,
Is now a stranger in the hall.

I need you,
more than you could ever know,
or need me back.

Because it’s so much worse
than you think it is.

To be me,
and to live my life,
is like living in hell,
right next to an unreachable
Heaven.

Because if you live like I do,
then you know what it’s like.

A demon,
living inside of you,

Scratching at your veins
to get out,
to escape.

But it’s trapped,
it always has been,
and it always will be;
because it’s NEVER getting out.

The sand I say,
is hard to hold
just like the stars

They are plentiful,
but picking just one
and keeping it
is hard

Somebody may have already
chosen that one
and lost it,
just as you will


So enjoy laying in the sand,
looking up at the stars,
as they will not last forever.

How are you supposed to fill a book when you don't have any words left in your mind or letters on your tongue?

- if you know the answer please tell me :(:

My chest is burning,
My heart is racing,
My hands are shaking,
My mind is exploding

The pain,
Is back

The familiar choking,
Like a ghost has its hands wrapped around my throat

The non stop sweating,
Like the whole world is on fire, just for me

The throbbing in my head,
And the pounding of my heart,
Like a drum beating inside of my body

Does it ever stop?

The answer,
I’m afraid

Is no.