I've won a day at the races
For me and my friend Doreen Maguire
Posh frocks and new hats
That's what we require.

So off we go shopping
Hair and nails done on the way
Well we girls want to lookj our best
For the big race day.

Now Doreen's buxom and curvy
Me I'm thin as a latt
Or you could say slim and slender
And Doreen's just fat.

We went in loads of shops
Nothing seemed to fit the bill
Everything was kind of frumpish
And we're definitly not over the hill.


Then we came accross this shop
In a side street in the town
It's called Reds Closet Boutique
And we both came out with a gown.

We got fascinators to match
Shoes, accessories and bags too
Doreen got something in pink
I got something in blue.

It was the day of the races
We were up with the lark
Had our lunch at Tom and Jerry's
Then off to Haydock Park.

The horses are under starters orders
And I'd backed the grey
Well it came home last
But it was winning all the way.

Now we came to the last race
And we're digging deep in our pocket
Doreen said put it on this
It's called Super Rocket.

Well it romped hom at 50/1
This horse called Super Rocket
And me and Doreen Maguire
Went home with brass in our pocket.

© Hazel

Jogging
På vein til landsbyen så jeg ville orkediers
men en joggene kvinne hadde også sett dem
Når det gjelder bloster er alle kvinner tyver,
*** stopped plukked blostene og fortsatte å jogge
antagelig på vei hjem til å sette orkidene in en vase
å beundre dem for noen dager.
Jeg var sint ville blomster bør stå i fred til glede
for mage andre som gikk denne veien.
I en butikk så jeg kunstige bloster de ser naturlige ut
kvinnen kunne ha kjøpt disse og latt naturen i fred.
*** var mager, middlealdren med an liten rumpe
og små bryster, *** jogget i ett fosøk å se ungdomelig
og ansiket hadde forstennet utrykk som følge
av en ansikt løfting, og det er jo ok, men *** skulle
ikke ha tukkled med tidens gange.