THE SUNFLOWERS

On the way to the store today
I decided to buy a packet of seeds
They had to be for giant sunflowers
Or else I would really have no need

As I strolled the aisles of the store
I came upon exactly what I was looking for
The packet said they’d grow to be six feet tall
Aiming toward the sky they would surely soar

I took the seeds out and they were oh so very small
How in the world were they going to grow to be so tall?
I took my time and planted each and every seed
In a straight row they went as if to form a floral wall

I watered and waited and even watered some more
Until one day I awoke and saw that they had broken ground
It seemed like they were growing at least a foot a day
One morning I arose and there were buds to be found

Each bud was compact and as tight as it could be
How in the world would they be able to open
Their petals were bent in with no where to go
They looked like they could explode but I knew not when

Today I woke up and was amazed at what I saw
Overnight the tucked away petals had burst open with pride
Big, bright yellow sunflowers were here at last
One little flower seed created sunflowers at least six inches wide

MY MASK

I was once sad and lonely,
Having nobody to comfort me,
So I wore a mask that always smiled;
To hide my feelings behind this gigantic lie.

Before long, I had many friends;
With my mask, I was one of them.
But deep inside, I still felt empty,
As though I was missing a larger part of me.

Nobody could hear my cries at night
For I designed my mask to hide the lies.
Nobody could see the pain I was feeling
For I designed my mask to always be laughing.

Behind all the smiles were the tears
And behind all the comfort were the fears.
Everything you think you see,
Wasn't everything there was to me.

Day by day,
I was slowly dying.
I couldn't go on,
There was something missing..

Until now I am still searching
For the one thing that'll stop my crying.
For someone who'll erase my fears,
For that person who'll wipe away my tears.

But until then I'll keep on smiling.
Hiding behind this mask I have learned to wear.
Just hoping for the day I will be able to smile,
Until then, I'll be right here hanging around for awhile.

SLEEPLESSNESS

I try my best to fall asleep at a decent hour
Yet, sometimes it seems I don’t have the power
No matter how hard I give it a try
Something always stops me and makes me want to cry

I have tried all the tricks in the book
If you only knew how many hours it took
Counting sheep, counting backward, or saying prayers
Nothing seems to work-I’m pulling out my hair

When I finally do fall asleep at night
My dreams always wake me with a horrid fright
Running, running, running but staying in one place
It’s as though I am stuck and will never win the race

Oh, how I wish I could dream of happier things to come
Instead of trying to get away from these things in which I run
I am mentally exhausted and need a good sleep
I feel like a bag of bones lying down in one large heap

There is always tomorrow I constantly say
I need some help-so I begin to pray
Dear Lord, help me make this pain go away
If you do, once I fall asleep, I know I will be okay

PULLING WEEDS

Here I sit contemplating the things I have been through
A long list of ugliness mixed in with the good things, too
It reminds me of a flower garden with weeds mixed in
A lot like the beauty of life with an assorted mix of sin

The flowers are calling out to you
Their life depends on what you do
The weeds can drain them of their life
Growing around their roots causing great strife

Just like life if you do not rid yourself of the bad
It can drain you of all the good things you have ever had
So, take the time to check your weeds
Pulling them out to plant your new seeds

It may take hours, days or even years
Your garden is getting full so get into gear
It starts with just pulling one
You will be surprised when you are done

The flowers, just like life, will prosper
Thanking you for making things proper
You see, God knows the weeds your garden contains
He wants you to pull them and start to maintain

OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE DISORDER

Seconds, minutes, hours and days go by
I have to count every minute and don’t know why
Cleaning, dusting, washing and planning
All must be done or moving on is just not happening

Routines and rituals are a daily task
Why can’t I escape it I have to ask
Things have to de done in a certain way
Or, I am truly afraid things won’t be okay

Checking and rechecking consume my day
It’s difficult to keep my daily rituals at bay
Things I own always have their proper place
Or, I cannot relax in my very own space

Doing things out of order will just not do
Moving things slightly makes me crazy, too
No matter how hard I try to refrain
Actions are overridden by my own brain

I am told this is one of my mechanisms to cope
If I’m not careful, I will be hung by my own rope
I can only take this one day at a time
But, if I continue to work on it, I should be just fine.

***-PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY, SEXUALLY

I have been abused more than I have ever let on
Physically, mentally, and sexually-it was all very wrong
I’ve tried my best to come to terms with it all
It just sickens me that I alone had to take the fall

Abuse is the worst as it causes hidden pain
You never know when the memories might start to rain
Falling like drops from the ever darkening sky
Soaking you with visuals that make you want to cry

Once you have come to terms with what truly has occurred
Be sure you talk to someone and make yourself  heard
Talking it out can relieve the building steam
Of those ugly memories contained in your many dreams

Stay strong while you relive the past
Knowing your ugly thoughts are not meant to last
Prayer and counseling can surely help
With this ugly hand you have randomly been dealt

It will take time to feel entirely whole again
Step by step-it’s just the way you must begin
Close your eyes-be free from the pain
Dream of happy things-its goodness will keep you sane

AN AMISH WEDDING

It’s a life I have always wanted to live
The Amish culture has so much to give
Close family bonds and a fondness for the old ways
No modern conveniences are used and are kept at bay

Horse and buggy take you where you need to go
Even on the coldest days as it starts to snow
A warm blanket is spread across your lap
The women always wearing their white prayer caps

They have no use for television, computers or cell phones
Fun for them is a singing at a location well known
The boys are on one side; the girls on the other
As curious eyes are kept on one another

When the singing is over pairs start to form
Talking outside while trying to stay warm
If a boy likes you, you are offered a ride
Sitting in his buggy very close to his side

You are courting now; soon to go steady
Marriage is published just as soon as you are ready
Planting celery in the garden is the next thing you must do
It’s the indication of a wedding where lives will start anew

LIFE IS A STAGE

I sure don’t want to live anymore
It’s the anxiety I abhor
No one does anything right
All I want to do is fight

My brain will not allow mistakes made by me
I explode when others make them; let me be
No matter how hard I try to stay calm
An explosion takes place just like a bomb

My nerves take over as my head starts to ache
Just how much more should I have to take?
There is no grey as it is all black and white
Any other color and it’s out of sight

Right is right and wrong is wrong; that is so clear
Is it really the mistakes I seem to fear?
Life has got to bend unlike that mighty oak
Staying way too rigid I am bound to croak

My brain seems to know what the choices are
I am scared my own death is not too far
I am lonely, anxious and so tired of the rage
In order for me to change, I need a new stage

THE GRANITE MOUNTAIN HOT SHOTS

They are willing to sacrifice their lives for others
Each one having worried mothers, fathers and lovers
They all know the risks that come with their jobs
Yet, go out anyway to protect the country’s mobs

It was said a lightning strike started the fire
So said the call that came across the wire
Yarnell was where the Hot Shots were called to go
The fire was building strength-come on let’s go

All twenty of the men raced to the scene of the fire
Not giving it a second thought-the fire looked dire
One man would stay behind and watch their backs
So the other nineteen men could begin their attack

They fought the fire the best they could
There was a sudden wind change-that’s no good
They scrambled about to get to safer ground
Away from the fire’s center they were bound

They didn’t make it out of the fire-that we know
It came at them so fast they had nowhere to go
They all died that day doing what they do best
Protecting lives of others, so minds could be at rest

Prescott lost nineteen heroes on that dreadful day
Memorials were built where roses would lay
Honoring the lives of the Granite Mountain Hot Shots was Prescott’s way
Never to forget the nineteen heroes lost to Heaven on that fire laden day!

STOP THESE FEELINGS

Feeling trapped with no where to go
I wish I had feelings of happiness to show
Depressed, anxious and raging, too
Some may ask, “what else is new?”

They say time heals all wounds
A cliché like “the man in the moon”
I may try to let it all go
But it still feels as badly as stubbing my big toe

Work through your problems they say
I have been trying that every **** day
Stay positive and keep going straight
As if that can stop it at a faster rate

Journaling, poetry and prayer help on the days
In which I feel the likes of rot and decay
Escaping this world seems the only way out
For some people it always seems the quickest route

I dream of finally finding everlasting peace
But the suicidal thoughts need to cease
I have to remember God has a plan
I’ve got to stay here just as long as I can

MARCH ARRIVES

Winter’s gone
Spring dawns

Leaves sprout
Blooms mount

Scents permeate
Children recreate

Adults mowing
Swings going

Dogs play
Cats foray

Warmer days
Longer rays

Summer soon
Beginning June

Laughter echoes
Bird crows

Picnics start
Popsicle carts

Pink lemonade
Ending days

Doors close
Ending prose

BLACK CLOUD

It follows me everywhere I go
When I take a step it always knows
I look over my shoulder as I walk
It glides above me just like a hawk

Bad things happen all the time
I wish for once things could be fine
It’s as though it always waits for me
Watch closely for it and you will see

I miss the curb and stumble and fall
I scrape my knee on the nearby wall
I wash my face forgetting my glasses are on
The money I was saving seems to be gone

I got up this morning hoping for change
But realize immediately something is strange
There’s blood on my pillow from a bleeding nose
Why it  decided to bleed today I sure don’t know

It all has to be because of just one thing
A black cloud follows me as though it has wings
I run away from it  as fast as my feet will go
I try to escape it - but looking up I see it’s still in tow

MY LITTLE FRIEND

Have you ever just stopped to watch a hummingbird?
You have to do it quietly as not to be heard
Approach with caution and make not a move
Until Mother Nature calls you; then it’s time-make your move

On a limb high above the ground
A hummingbird is perched making no sound
Suddenly the hummingbird leaves its resting place
It flies in front of you as it shows you both its beauty and its grace

Wings are flapping as fast as they can
Reminding you of the spinning blades of a summertime fan
Chirping is heard as it begins to move away
You can only imagine what it is trying to say

You see it hover over a bright red flower
Its wings flapping away with so much power
Its beak begins to pierce the flower’s center
Spreading the pollen as it begins to enter

It’s such an amazing show to stand by and see
As it competes for this same flower with a nearby bumble bee
Take time out of your day to watch the hummingbirds
And, you just might be at a loss for any sort of words

WORRY

I cannot seem to stop the constant worry
As I navigate through my own complicated life.
My brain is always in such a **** hurry
To find the answers to all the future strife.

How will I manage to care for myself
When all the others are dead and gone?
I have no money or friends with any sort of wealth,
No one to help me get by with every break of dawn.

It scares me that I might be out on the streets
Living in the elements with nowhere to call a home.
I envision my feet blistering from any excessive heat
Continually walking aimlessly with no free space to roam.

Is there anyone out there that truly cares,
Or am I left to myself to do it all on my very own?
Will anyone come forward and invite me to share
Something as simple as a meal or even a phone?

The only way to get through this is to have great faith in God.
He will watch over me as long as I continue to believe.
I must learn to let it all go by acknowledging Him with a single nod
Trusting He knows where He is taking me and He will never leave!

HOOTY HOO’S

Every night Misty and I take our walk
Walking ever so quickly as we have our talk
From tree to bush to rock we go
Sniffing to see who’s been by-she has to know

Overhead I hear the familiar sounds
Of two owls making their daily rounds
They have come to know Misty and I
Always waiting for us with a close, close eye

Hoo Hoo, you can hear them say
Just to let Misty and I know they are okay
I ask to see them in their silent flight
As if to honor me, they fly by just like a lost kite

Smooth, quiet and graceful as they soar
From tree to tree me always wanting to see more
They trust Misty and I as we wander by
I always make it a habit to just say “hi”

On our way home, they hoot some more
A language all their own I’ve learned to adore
I call them my special Hooty Hoo’s
The perfect nickname for these owls I knew

THE MORNING SUNRISE

Sable is lying on top of me digging into me with her claws
This can only mean morning is here as she swipes me with her paw
Get up Daddy- It’s time to go on our walk
That’s what she’d be saying if she could only talk

Misty Grace is watching all of this unfold
She lets Sable do the ***** work if the truth be told
We’re hungry and it’s time to rise and shine
Get up now or we will all be behind

Half asleep I get up and start my day
My two little girls just want me to play
It takes food to quiet them both down
Misty barks; Sable cries-welcome to my world of morning sounds

I grab the leash and call out Misty’s name
It’s time for our walk-every morning is the same
Misty takes the lead as Sable takes up the rear
The three of us walking-our destination is near

I look up to the sky seeing the sunrise with all its beauty
As Misty Grace and Sable take care of their morning duties
God has painted a beautiful sunrise with the stroke of a single brush
As we enjoy it, the three of us realize we are no longer in a rush!

CUTTING

I cannot hold things in much longer-this I know
All feelings of anxiety, anger and fear must go
I sit on the edge of my bed just wondering how
Having an urge to get rid of these feelings right now

But, how, what am I to do
I need to think things through
In time an idea will come to me
That will set these horrible emotions free

Suddenly, I look down and see a box on the floor
What it contains is a single item and nothing more
I lift the box and bring it up to the bed
I do it very quietly and nothing at all is said

The box contains a knife that is brand new
I open it and stare at it knowing what I must do
I take the knife out while opening its blade, too
I could feel the adrenalin rushing-this was nothing new

First one cut, then two as they started to bleed
The release of pent up emotion is what I need
I get a tissue to soak up the blood that I see
It’s through these cuts my hidden emotions are finally set free

THE SIMPLE LIFE

I’m not made to live in the big city
My job had kept me here-what a pity
I wanted to be a social worker or a monk
Instead ended up in business and was ultimately sunk

My compassion, caring and loving heart
Knew I had to leave to find a new part
It wouldn’t be easy that’s for sure
But it had to be done for me to endure

So, I left the fast paced business world I was in
In the long run it was sure to be a win
I took time off to clear my mind
I was breaking down and needed to unwind

I now know it’s not all about that mighty dollar
It’s so much more than wearing those starched collars
Be more comfortable and be more free
Who cares if you don’t use your degree

Life’s too short to worry yourself sick
Find something simpler-take your pick
The simple fact is your life here is meant to be happy and kind
So, take control of your life and that new job won’t be hard to find

RAINING TEARS

It starts with thoughts from the past
Sort of like a play with a violent cast
You never know how it will begin
All you know is you can never win

The actors turn out to be people you know
They consistently hurt you when you are low
There are put downs and fights to lower your self esteem
They become common place and can bring you to your knees

Your body looks for ways to deal with the impending pain
It’s one of the only ways you just might remain sane
Like a hot kettle with its lid about to blow
You have to let the pain out before you explode

First one tear, followed by tears two and three
Streaming down your face setting the pain free
Pretty soon a flood of tears start to fill your weary eyes
Much like the heaviest rain that is going on outside

Let them fall, let them come as much as you can
Don’t try to stop them thinking crying isn’t for a man
A good long cry can release the pain you feel
While at it, there’s a good chance you might begin to heal

THE GRAND OLD TREE

As I enter the park I see this majestic tree
All alone standing there so very strong and free
It’s as though a magnet draws me there
Knowing I have a weary soul to bare

I think of the generations of people it has served
Standing there with its many limbs being so curved
Kids playing, shade offered, picnics beneath
Dogs sniffing, grabbing a scent from the grass underneath

What this tree must have seen in all these years
Children climbing, lovers underneath sharing their tears
Drug deals, dogs fighting, random ***
Never knowing what it might see next

This strong humble tree is over one hundred years old
It holds a multitude of secrets if all be told
It never makes a sound as it stands there all alone
Unless the wind stirs up causing some wonderful tones

I can go to this tree to meditate and escape my daily life
While others have come to it to carve their initials with a pocket knife
Whichever you choose this old tree will be there for you
Just walk on over to it- You have nothing to lose

MY SISTER SUE

We were so close in our ages
Some would’ve called us twins
Like two paragraphs on a page
One ends while the other one begins

Your life ended tragically and much too soon
I’m left without you-looking for a new way to begin
The sun still rises as does the moon
Sometimes I feel it’s just a race to see who’s gonna win

The pain is still alive within me
I know you’d want me to let it go
I try, dear sister, as I get down on one knee
Praying to the loving God I’ve now come to know

I wish I could hear your voice once more
Even if it’s to yell at me to get back on my feet
Your death shook me to my inner most core
I’m so sorry you felt such bitter defeat

I’ll keep looking up to the sky for you
Just send me a sign
I will never ever forget you Sue
Just knowing that; I should be fine

INVISIBLE

It’s difficult to be invisible to most
I have become quite adept living as a ghost
I never felt wanted as a child
There were feelings of pain that weren’t so mild

Being the middle child you get lost in the mix
Like an old watch that loses time with each one of its ticks
You pinch yourself just to make sure you are alive
It feels like the sting of a bee from a nearby hive

Yes, you are definitely alive and real
Why is it others cannot tell how you feel
Sitting all alone curled up in a ball
I just want to be recognized; that’s all

Throw me the ball just once I say
Don’t pick me last when it comes time to play
I am here in front of you waving my arms as much as I can
It’s no use, you still don’t see me the way I had planned

I’ve learned to deal with being hurt and left out
It comes from years of crying no doubt
If I could ask for just one thing as I pray
It’s for someone to finally listen-I have much to say

THE ROAD WE WERE MEANT TO TAKE

Is anyone ever truly happy or content?
Just as one thing goes right another is apt to go wrong
Setting one back further on the road from which he came
Taking the proper steps back can seem, oh, so very long.

Yet, we travel that road where we started
Over and over again to make all things right
Our determination is bound to get the best of us
We will not fail if we choose to use all of our might

Once we get over that bump in the road
We can continue on in any direction we choose
We’ll never know what is in store for us next
Stepping carefully forward-we have nothing to lose

Yes, we may trip, fall, or even get lost
But, we must continue walking on this particular road of ours
As the good Lord wanted us to use it to move forward
Knowing we’d be carrying our heaviest burdens hour after hour

When we fall, He will be there to pick us up
He built the road so He knows where we will falter
He will get us safely to the end of our road
As long as we worship Him at the foot of His altar!

MISTY AND FAITH

Misty, it was just the other day you were well
Jumping and playing; no one could tell
You got sick so quickly my little girl
You can’t leave me now my blessed pearl

You are the gem of my heart
On a strict regiment we will embark
No more fatty foods or even treats
We need to get this condition quickly beat

I will start slowly so you understand
Giving you pills to take by my loving hand
I know they are big, but swallow them if you can
And, if you get too warm sit by the blowing fan

Someday soon you will forget you were sick
I will be watching the clock as it chimes and ticks
You see, we have time on our side
To get through the roughest of tides

I have prayed to both St Francis and to God
I patiently wait for both their heads to nod
To acknowledge our prayers have in fact been heard
Get well my little angel as we wait for God’s healing words

MOM

Where have my memories gone?
We were out playing on the lawn.
I struggle for any memory other than that day.
Nothing comes to me except them wheeling you away.

There you were lying dead on the floor.
We could see you through the glass in the door.
We thought you were sleeping and fell off the bed.
It never occurred to us that you were dead.

Why did you leave us all alone Mom?
That morning everything seemed so calm.
There are so many questions I want to ask of you.
You were erased from our memories as far as everyone knew.

What would you say was your favorite food?
What kind of music would calm your mood?
What was your favorite color or even your favorite flower?
Which Bible verse had the most power?

What color was your natural hair?
Would you have fun and take a dare?
What color were your beautiful eyes?
What were your favorite things to buy?

The list of questions I have goes on and on.
They run through my mind from night until dawn.
I wish I could come up with a memory of you.
Other than seeing you dead, and being wheeled away, too.

Why did you abandon us on that July 4th day?
Leaving us with Dad thinking we’d be okay.
You mentioned you were despondent and hated who you’d become.
Without the comfort of your touch-we had all become lonesome.

Oh, what I would give to have you here today.
So much has happened and there is so much I want to say.
It’s been a lonely, rough life for me if you only knew.
I wish I could give you a great big hug and say I love you!

Please watch over me from above.
All I want is to feel your love.
Keep me close and in your heart.
No one will ever again keep us apart!

THE POWER OF THE ROSE

I never know when they will appear
I am always pleasantly surprised when one is near
Their color, their beauty, their shape and form
Are all individually unique as they are born

Sprouting and budding all over the bush
There is more room needed so one bud needs to push
The wind comes along and the bush begins to bend
Making more room for the buds-there is no end

First one opens, then two, and three
Their petals are just bursting to be set free
Here comes number four, five and six
Adding even more color to the already beautiful mix

Their beauty is in stark contrast to their many thorns
Their scent fills the air once they are born
Such beauty and elegance are not to be missed
Make sure smelling the roses is on your list

ST Therese knows the value of the rose
She places them near us as we doze
When we awake and see one of these special flowers
Know that ST Therese has been by-taking our grief away with kindness and power

LOVE STRAYS

Something keeps following Misty and I
Our every move is being watched with questioning eyes
At first she kept her distance from us
As not to cause us any sort of fuss

As time went on the closer she got
It appeared it was friendship that she truly sought
Skinny and alone with no where else to go
A stray cat following me with Misty in tow

After a few months her courage began to show
As though she was saying you’re safe-that I know
It started with my petting and Misty’s sniffing
It led to courage and her heart listening

She knew we were safe and needed a home
She was tired of always being on the roam
Misty and she had become close friends
A cat and a dog with feelings of love to lend

She needed a name so we called her Sable
Not your typical cat with a fear of dogs label
She now resides in our home and is no longer a stray
She’s part of our extended family and is here to stay

BIRD SORROW

I find a bird that cannot fly
His mother nearby asking why
The back and forth chirping is so loud
As it echoes off the high flying clouds

A cat has injured the poor bird’s wing
It can no longer perch in the trees to sing
Trying as hard as he can to fly away
He realizes he is on land to forever stay

Mom keeps chirping and staying by his side
She wishes she, herself, could give him a ride
It’s so sad to watch the two of them cry
As he keeps jumping up trying to fly

His life has been shortened I’m sad to say
All I can do is move him and watch him lay
Tears come to my eyes as I watch him try
Knowing for certain he will never be able to fly

Mother Nature must now take her course
I cannot interfere with Her powerful force
God, please watch over this little bird’s life
Reach down and grab him taking away his strife

THE COYOTES’ MESSAGE

You never know when you’ll see one
They pass quietly through the night
Keep your eyes and ears open
And, one or two will come into sight

So quickly they come and go
Moving with a mystic kind of grace
Once they see you, they’ll turn around
Slinking away at a quickened pace

You are one of the fortunate ones
They allowed you to see their face
Quietly into the night they will go
Returning to their den without any haste

As you see them leaving
You look up to the sky
Thanking God for what you just saw
He chose you to see them but you wonder why

He has a message for you
He uses the coyotes to spread the news
What are you waiting for
You have nothing to lose

He promises everything will be alright
Let go of the past and begin anew
It is time for you to move on with your life
Just like the coyotes returning home will do

SABLE

She came to us needing a new home
A stray that was tired of being on the roam
She was hesitant at first to get very near
But in time she got over this fear

It started with her following Misty and I
She’d walk behind us keeping a close eye
Everywhere Misty and I went she was there
They really made quite an interesting pair

She’d get closer and closer as days went by
I wish she’d let me pet her I would sigh
Then one day she let down her guard
For her to do so must have been hard

As I went to touch her she started to purr
It was her way of thanking me-you kind sir
From that moment on she became a true friend
I knew I’d take care of her until the very end

Her coat and color made Sable the perfect name
With lots of love and reassurance she became quite tame
She will forever be a part of our family for years to come
She will never have to worry again about being lonesome

INVISIBLE

It’s difficult to be invisible to most
I have become quite adept living as a ghost
I never felt wanted as a child
There were feelings of pain that weren’t so mild

Being the middle child you get lost in the mix
Like an old watch that loses time with each one of its ticks
You pinch yourself just to make sure you are alive
It feels like the sting of a bee from a nearby hive

Yes, you are definitely alive and real
Why is it others cannot tell how you feel
Sitting all alone curled up in a ball
I just want to be recognized; that’s all

Throw me the ball just once I say
Don’t pick me last when it comes time to play
I am here in front of you waving my arms as much as I can
It’s no use, you still don’t see me the way I had planned

I’ve learned to deal with being hurt and left out
It comes from years of crying no doubt
If I could ask for just one thing as I pray
It’s for someone to finally listen-I have much to say

LIFE AS I KNOW IT

I was born not knowing what tragedy my life would see
At first things seemed just as pleasant as they could be
But something was wrong-I could feel it deep inside
As the years went by, all I wanted to do was run and hide

My mom left me when I was nearly five years old
Her death really traumatized me if the truth be told
I saw her lying in her bedroom dead on the floor
Taking her own life; I couldn’t handle it anymore

I withdrew for my own safety into a shell
My life had just become a living Hell
We were never to bring her up anymore
It was as though she never was-it hurt me to the core

My sister Sue decided she couldn’t cope
She turned to liquor and pills for some kind of hope
Tragically, she died at forty three from the work of her own hands
It was more tragedy and sadness than I could truly stand

Not more than two years later-the month being the same
My brother Mike starved himself to death-what a shame
He had so much to live for if he would have opened his eyes
It was so **** difficult for me to say my final goodbyes

So, you see, my life is far from what it used to be
My heart and soul ache as I pray on bended knee
God, please watch over me as I continue down my road
Help me to move forward as I carry this very heavy load!

MY TIME

Is it too much to ask for to be left all alone
No human contact or the ringing of a telephone
Mornings are for me to be alone with my thoughts
Trying to untie my stomach with its nasty knots

I never feel like I get enough open space
When I wake up early and see someone’s face
Just knowing someone is in the house
Makes me tip toe around as quiet as a mouse

Someone always seems to require my attention
I get sick and tired of answering all the questions
When you see me, please step to one side
I am not in the mood to talk but rather hide

I relish being alone like a hermit in the woods
That is where I’d live if only I could
Big city life is definitely not for me
The older I become that’s easier to see

It’s very simple to just stay out of my way
When you see me, turn around, and walk the other way
My routine is the same and is clearly a known
Is it too much to ask for to be left all alone?