World Of Blackhearts

  I’ve journeyed long and far
Through the valley of shadows
I’ve been to Hell and come face to face
With the Devil and took his best blows

The Demons I face each day come
In a variety of disguises
Each one with tricks of kindness
But my shield is ready for their surprises

My armor has stood the test of time
Evil is no match for my sword
Because my faith is strong and I know
I can trust in God’s word

I will continue to fight evil
With the power of his light
And I know I’m always prepared
For the darkest night

I know soon I’ll be in Heaven for the end
Is near, for love in humans has become sparse
Each day it’s more noticeable
We live in a world of Blackhearts

Written By: Charles Kean
Copyright © 07/25/2021
All rights reserved

.well back in my days (2 years ago)... you could groove to Patti Smith sing her rock 'n' roll ******, and listen to American Head Charge cover the same song... you could actually listen to Die Krupps Nazis auf Speed... back in my day - you weren't deemed a 70 year old nostalgia steam-train... while still in your early 30s; good luck finding that Patti Smith track... might as well resort to róże europy: kości czerwone, kośsci czarne (european roses: red bones, black bones)... and to think the *** pistols got away with their shenanigans... 40 years prior; Patti Smith! come on! it's a great tune! or tuning... whichever.

racial slurs... so the suffix in
schwarze-negger is
a collective private property?!
Dr. Dre can say it,
as urban insult,
and i'm reduced to a colonial
past that isn't even mine?!
can i say the names
of countries like Nigh-ger-ia...
or Nigh-ger?
          can it just be an urban
slur these days?
   compared to spawn,
yes, black panther *****...
***** on a lemon before
******* on ***...
          what's next:
yo... walking *****?!
      the ****... well... if we're
in the interracial Olympics,
i once ****** a bony black
girl with a Kama Sutra slim, tight,
that it wouldn't require a 12"
to penetrate a Ghanian lard
yo-yo...
               pulverized
the soft pouch of flesh where my
***** originate from
using her coccyx...
   ****...
          even i didn't expect
finding out the riff...
   on joan jett & the blackhearts'
song i hate myself for loving
you...
      i'm with the Ire on the topic
of racial slurs...
   instead of "offense"...
we resort to head-butts...
   like the two Posen bucks...
running headlong into
a bare canvas...
            comment section?
well... obviously i take off
my Francis Bacon mask.

Je peux emporter votre douleur encore
une fois vous vous sentez comme retomber
dans le même lit c'était presque facile
de tomber en amour avec moi comme je t'aime , mais vous ne serez jamais m'aimer
comme que vous
êtes un ange et je suis Satan spawn

Très chers mère Marie veuillez me pardonner votre favori pécheur car je suis maintenant n'est plus capable de faire la lumière dans ce monde de la sombre et froide Blackhearts timide que j'adore

.surprisingly, poached cauliflower tastes so **** good in between pouring drinks... with a little bit of dill... well when you're drinking, and haven't eaten anything prior, other than about six cinnamon biscuits, makes sense to make an interlude with vegetables to fill you up, rather than settling on a meat, or a carbohydrate... the seagull effect... filled stomach, with a low calorie count, before ms. amber fits the spot.

eureka! i found it, the old jukebox
that was once the youtube of
the 00s...
              and early 1-zeros...
**** right i'm proud,
   i had to fiddle the algorithm
a bit, but i managed to return
to early jukebox formality...
all it took was listening to a few
pop songs and other familiar
cross-genre songs...

it began with
uncle acid & the deadbeats'
song dead eyes of London...
the whole trick is in how far
the suggestions extend...
       obviously the first suggestions
look like this:

         now that we're dead - metallica,
  U2 - hold me, thrill me, kiss me, **** me
joan jett & the blackhearts - i hate myself
                                                  for loving you
lady gaga - alejandro
                 bon jovi - blaze of glory
   the prodigy - one man army
                     roxette - she got the look
megadeth - symphony of destruction
   the jimi hendrix experience -
            all along the watchtower...
a jordan peterson video... what the ****?!
ke$ha - die young
   **** - blue monday....
etc.
  
but then you scroll down,
and find what youtube used to look like
as the prime jukebox...
bands like:
w.a.s.p. (wild child)
   ****** jesus (i am the mountain)
spiderbait (black betty)
   pat benatar (love is a batterfield)
    jace everett (bad things)
    king dude (pagan eyes over german skies)
ghoultown (drink with the living dead)
all them witches (the marriage of coyote women)
halestorm (do not disturb)
the pretty reckless (take me down)
with (seer)
                  death (you're a prisoner)
1000mods (electric carve)
red fang (wire)
        lucifer (izrael)
   beastmaker (evil one)
   boys noize (1010)
   church of the cosmic skull (evil  in
your eyes)
     sleep (giza butler)
   the flying hat band (lost time)
kadavar (die baby die)
    valley of the sun (the sayings of the seers)
hexvessel (teeth of the mountain)
   hallas (astral seer)
  jess and the ancient ones (S/T, full album)
high on fire (electric messiah, full album)
elephant tree (elephant tree, full album)
    acid mothers temple & the cosmic...
                      (take me to the universe)
acid king (middle of nowhere, center of
                   everywhere, full album)
radio moscow (magical dirt, full album)
    borracho (atacama, full album)
               fu manchu (daredevil, full album)
somali yacht club (the sun, full album)
elder (reflections of a floating world, full album)

i think that's a decent diet...
well... not that i've listened to any of these,
yet...
but given how the jukebox is
behaving, i thought i'd write out all the new
suggestions and return to them
in the search...
                          OM i already know...
but ****...
    it took me so long to penetrate
this new ****** algorithm to find
the old thesaurus selection search result...
i mean... this new algorithm
has no notion of the synonym...
all it fires is...
   a miser variation of...
     it's not exactly antonym either.

i hope this selections helps you
                in penetrating this new algorithm
to find new music...
      it's wide enough...
apart from OM... all these bands are:
i was born yesterday new.

life has becoming exciting, once more...

well **** me, i really wasn't expecting that...
i only met this girl, woman, single mum(?)
at Wembley, two weeks ago for our training /
induction...

i just sent her a text on whatsapp
confirming that it was me sending her a text,
nothing for two weeks, why?

last Sunday i just sent her a text asking
her whether or not she was working,
she said she already took up a different
job, catering in a west end theatre,
eh, oh well... so i sent her a photo
inside the stadium....

'it's empty!'
well yeah, we can't take photographs on the job
came my reply only today...
then some chit-chat about work...
she said that i should be looking for
something else, getting an SIA certificate
blah blah... to which i replied:
oh don't worry, i have always something
to do, i write poems & so-called poems
attaching a picture of my hand holding
a physical copy of a book
i published...

Mateusz Conrad - Πoετιc Oπτoμετρy
you want a copy?
'is it a pdf file, do you have a pdf file,
or is it one of those: REAL books'
oh yeah, it's a physical book,
send me your, ahem ms. Evelyn... ?
and your address...

she didn't send me her address, i commented:
well, that's healthy, no need to trust me
outright like that, even though, me?
stalking? hanging around some woman's
house? **** that...

- would i like to meet up for coffee?
oh, sure... the 12th of December, 10am...
too early? oh no, no...
by the station?
well... that's a date then...

for ****'s sake... that was easy...
coffee: date? it's not exactly me coughing up
money for a meal,
but being a hermit for so long...
i can't remember the last date i was on...
no... wait... i do...
terrible idea... she picked me up in a nightclub...
worst place to meet women...
we ended up going to the park...
i was drinking a bottle of red wine,
she tried to keep up...
we went to a pub and i drank a pint of Guinness...
she bailed: she was apparently meeting up
with some girlfriends for food...
my god, i was lucky... i hated her company...
she wasn't frigid: just nervous...
i can appreciate excited nervousness
but not nervousness when you know
something is awry... when you haven't clicked...

good, she ****** off while i ordered a second pint...
and basked in drinking alone
looking at people... apart from going
into a forest, or a graveyard: watching people...
it's up there with my other fetish:
for the deutschezunge...

some other date... we were supposed to go to a gallery...
we ended up just having coffee:
i implored her: stop playing cat & mouse with me...
you're late? i'm early, blah blah...
in a cafe i pulled out a spoon that was still
lodged in her cup: you'll poke your eye out...
i don't think she liked that...
but who the **** drinks anything from a cup
with a protruding spoon still lodged in the cup?!
for ****'s sake: a straw, fair enough...
the girl was going to poke her eye out!

ugh... i never heard from her ever again...
we went on a date prior, with this other girl i knew prior
from knowing a high school friend...
this Lebanese girl... hmm... Alicia...
in school i once asked her out to go to the cinema:
RE-JECTED... i suspect: nervous middle-eastern, Levant
christian goody-girl...
but when i invited her to visit me
for Hogmanay up in Edinburgh
with my first on-and-off girlfriend
  (circa 2005) she came along... my then on-and-off
also brought a colt... a little Aussie...
annoying as ****... had a nickname... sponge?
something like that... the three of them slept in
my bed while i slept on the floor...

a year prior my then on-and-off g/f came...
days... i remember spending a lot of the time
suckling at her *******... nothing happened down south...
i can still hear the echo of her moans...
a year later... she lost her virginity to me
while Alicia was sitting in the living room reading:
the Hours... Michael Cunningham...

personally? i preferred Virginia Woolf, herself...
lucky me: not losing my virginity to a ******...
the sensation of trying to scalpel past the thin layer
of protective skin of the ******...
i don't know... pleasant, weird...
thank god i'm not circumcised...
i can have the capacity to ******* without inhibitions
but during the act pull the "excess" skin back...
ergo? no need to pay back the added "luxuxury"
of circumcision with the advent of
either Judaism / Islam...
n'ah... i have my "excess" skin attached...
**** the kippah **** the payer 5 times a day...
fasting? i do that do secular reasons...

i feel sorry for the circumcised brood...
jerking off must feel rather impossible...
plus... all that sensitivity: ****! gone...
well... that's the price you pay...
i'm a free radical: while the circumcised ones attach
so much attention to: payback...
woman... wear a niqab, woman: the patriarchy...
hell... i prefer prostitutes to begin with...
clear as day... no need for dating...
i'm there for only one thing and one thing alone...
bypass all the usual chit-chat
"job interview" types, the table(?)
sure... i cook for myself, i clean the house...
now that i'm working... i'm going to have
a confidence booster... when i was really in
a state of: de profundis... no one was there...
i picked myself up... self-help par excellence...
now?              *******...

i'm going to listen to joan jett & the blackhearts
whether you like it or don't...
reading Kant, Heidegger, Kierkegaard is finally
paying off... now... now... women are starting
to take interest in me...
sure... without any additional psychopathy:
let's play...
after all: i'm not a woman... i'm not the one with
children... but hell... if i have to fill the role
of father, i'll play... i think of
the historical anomaly of ancient Rome...
how readily the men would
take up fostering... i'm likewise...
i don't care much for Darwinism's arguments
about furthering my DNA...
DNA can go **** itself...
i'm thought prior to body, firstly...
i know that's counter to what's "expected" but,
so far... the ought-i complexity has allowed
me to navigate with more freedom than
i-will could ever satiate me with...

- even though i don't believe in reincarnation...
why? what... only an elected number of actual
people... who migrate from body to body of...
the rest of the people are what? solipsists... zombies?!
reincarnation is inhumane...
but if i were... from my given names &
as a diviner of the Hebrew deity...
three names stand out...

St. Matthew... (calling of st. matthew by Caravaggio)
Konrad von Wallenrode / Konrad I of Masovia...
ha ha... who else might the third
if not Balaam?!

- it's good to have a self-deprecating sense of humour,
i never thought myself as attractive,
vaguely curious,
i would stand before the mirror
and focus on my green eyes...
my beard... oh god: me and my beard envy...
thank god i have height covered...
but beard envy? what a plague...
sort of thin in daylight...
filled up... volume excess in artificial light...

i sometimes wonder: Antichrist or... Paraclete (ref.
Jung, in his Answer to Job)....
i stopped caring... a stolen identity crisis
that began with Nietzsche in the 19th century...
Marilyn Manson... so many people
with the avatar / moniker-666 attacked...
what horrors are to be avaited,
since our present times are so bountifully
soothing?
why am i so lucky, to have so so much freedom
as to follow Voltaire's
maxim from Candide:
England isn't my home...
but the people, the things around me...
i feel implored to tend to them,
i feel implored to care for them...
there's no reason beside reason-in-itself...
i need to... it's a duty... it's a sacrifice i am willing to make...
because it would break my heart should
i be deemed slacking...
i reconfirm this attitude by shying into
ejecting a tear, or two...
this must have taken place... i must be here....
i must do this...
i must write this...
i'm insignificant compared to a heart surgeon...
but i am nonetheless unavoidable...
i can't just magically wish myself away...
i have to stand firm...
i am: feet... i am gravity...
i am: if the most allows me: the least being
the reciprocation of experience...

oh how i wish i could give up!
oh how i wish!
so many ******* idiot! so many ******* solipsists!
so many ******* eager piglets! at the trough, are we?
so many, little people, belittling people!
if i could only allow these people an inquiry
into the basic standards of expressing manners...
of inquiring into tact...
perhaps... i wouldn't have to conjure up...
a fetish for Robespierre!

no, i can't... leave these people... that's the best
you can... let one lesser psychopath come into contact
with a psychopath that might overcome them...
let us allow reality to be: as harsh as it's necessary...
people don't learn via giving them candy...
they learn... by allowing them to imagine a carrot...
then whipping them across the head with a stick...
education is not somehow formal:
education needs to be forced...

it requires someone to be erudite: however it might
be specified...
i lament... so many people circumstance
themselves as these: self-entitled pseudo-beings...
pseudo-humans... they are so self-entitled...
what shock, when they are robbed of their
status, or when their status is undermined...
what pitiful creatures, what has time allowed,
what, has, time, allowed?
what have people in their own capacity, allowed?

i wish i could be firmly cynical when looking
at man... by way of cynicism i could
fathom a work-around: a schematic...
i'm not a cynic though... i'm just hopeless...
for the time being: i'll just pretend that everything is
somehow: obliterated within the confines
of a rainbow future...

i'll keep the orchestra surrounding the sound
of falling rain to myself...
as i will keep... the sight of snow falling
in a graveyard at night: to myself...
here i am...
                        alone, aloof... blessedly content
with both circumstances; to further mould me,
while i await my exit.

- oh, **** me... i'm working a 20th & 26th shift
at Craven Cottage...
it's the 9th today... Monday's the 12th...
i'll have to see the Turk over the weekend to get
my beard trimmed!