Dear Me,

It's been a while.

A lot has changed.

You have, mostly.

You still smile when someone's watching,

You still sing like no one's listening,

You still love like... well... it's different now.

She's still right next to you, and you wake up every day next to her.

But it's different now.

You've lived your life in an endless sea of chaos.

Never knowing what pain tomorrow brings.

She soothed that pain for so long.

You've lived your life always in service of others.

She showed you that it's okay to be selfish.

You've lived your life with walls that protect you from the pain.

She showed you that it's okay to hurt.

You've lived your life with anguish and sorrow as side-effects of a past you couldn't control.

She showed you that it's not your fault.

-

You thought everything was good.

You thought everything was perfect.

But when you finally allowed your walls to come down,

New emotions flooded your mind.

The chaotic sea was no longer, instead a beautiful corral reef.

Like you always were.

You were scared of these new feelings.

The magnificence of your true self blinding.

You were scared of becoming something that she wouldn't like.

You were scared of becoming something that she would leave.

You were scared that by becoming your truest self it would cause everything to change.

She showed you that you were wrong.

She showed you that you are beautiful

She showed you that you are strong.

She showed you that no matter what, she loves you.

Because she knows that no matter what, you love her too.

-

Your thing isn't my thing, but your thing is okay too.

Be true.

Be you.

Love freely.

Love boldly.

Love.

i am a mirror, fragile

glass breaks and shatters across the lonely

sky i look up to, darkening my soul

further, i fall into my own

i am a mirror

fragile glass breaks and shatters across the lonely sky i look up to

darkening my soul further

i fall into my own

i am a mirror.

my reflection is not who i am, i am conscious of what i see, but i know it is not me.

i am not a mirror.

Ceiling tile and bleach, a momentary nostalgia

What once was lost cannot be taken back

The sweet summer smell of home, a hell on earth

crying tears of joy and pain

both necessary in a world of evil

yet what do we do with that pain

a choice lies ahead

a sweet sweet day it is

decisions become face to face

between a rock and a hard place.

people often tell me that there's nothing i can't do
but more often times than not it really isn't true

i have no special talents,
i'm a nobody unlike you

you're special to somebody,
and that will pull you through

so don't say that you're a nobody,
because nobody knows you

don't tell yourself you're alone,
because i'll be here too

when you succeed- i will stay,
just a nobody,
so you can be somebody.

and then one day
i'll be happy too.

so there i was a cool wind breeze still here
little to no end no hate inside me
the rustling leaves disturbed by a deer
how tranquil this canvas of joyful glee
i cannot express in words my shocked heart
as a stabbing wound i begin to bleed
differing no more to them tell apart
so brethren fallen shed their empty creed
a still image of a bound soulless husk
from afar only bones tell my story
as the dawn wanes into the creeping dusk
so does the golden age of my sound glory
there is no more reason for me to stay
the winter shall come as the dawn calls day

taking a backseat to my own life,

white seats black tires

eyes gray from the light,

no emotions, no desire

a prisoner in stripes,

everything is in black and white.

Mr Rorschach says otherwise,

no more fine lines,

blobs of ink dotted along the path of righteousness,

the steel pen doth break the sword.

everything gray
everything grey

who's to say right or wrong,

everything in black and white.

what comes out of the shadows but a small idea that can't be contained

when all is said and done there is nothing but dust and debris

a small pile of rubble shifts as a phoenix of rebirth rises
shot down time and time again
by poachers who want the ashes of the phoenix

as the man picked up his wilted daughter from the ground he cried
the phoenix was no longer