Why did I want to die?
Why did I want to end my life?
You're taught to be grateful
Every time the sun sets but returns every morning
How the flowers grow then die then grow again
And you understand the circle of life
But want to take matters into your own hands
My hands
Were tools to hurt and bring me down
Closer to the ground
And as I was falling
The sky seemed to become out of my reach
And they don't teach these things
While I was sitting in math
I pondered my own path
In English
I wanted to be finished
And if it was committed
Would I win or would I lose
Could I even choose
Death seemed better then going home
That's when I was alone
And I could scream
As loud as I wanted
Without anyone hearing a peep
I could smile
I could laugh
But that never replaced how I felt at the end of day
Make myself bleed to ignore my other pain
To this day
I'm not the same
Death seemed so easy
Believe me
I wanted to die
So I didn't have to feel
Or know that my life was real
I didn't want to deal
But I'm still here