Jul 2013
I am a lioness you didn’t know you disturbed and how to tame, I would have been fine without you.
2. I can’t say this was my cousin’s fault, but sometimes I wish I’d never met you so I didn’t have to feel like there’s a void in my heart that is the size of the universe. You make me feel empty - no, you empty me, even now.
3. I let you under my skin, and inside my head and you found that it was too crowded with existentialism; I thought I had found my life’s meaning when you showed up, love seemed like an awfully good reason to be alive.
3. You told me to get over it instead of helping me get through it.
4. I left because you made it seem like you had no more reason to stay.
5. You chose your friends over me, I had to choose myself over you.
6. But wherever you are, I hope you’re happy.
7. Don’t think of me as an ex. Think of me as a practice dummy, a test run, so you don’t feel bad about hurting me. I had to teach you how to love, so you’ll know what to do when you find the right one.
8. Just because I’m not the one for you anymore, doesn’t mean I never was.
8. But was I ever the right one?
9. You said I was the best thing in your life, I didn’t think ‘right now’ lasted two weeks.
10. I still keep your Valentine card between the pages of Mockingjay when Katniss realised she loved Peeta.
10. I’m still writing about you, and you seem to be doing perfectly fine without me.
11. I still remember when you told me you were up all night thinking about me, and how terrified I felt.
12. My heart literally skipped a bit when we first held hands.
13. Sometimes I forget what I told you the night of our first kiss. I said: I will fall in love with you, you don’t have to love me back. I’m gonna give you all my heart. 4 seconds of insane and humiliating courage.
13. I’m sorry I expected more than you can give.
13. Sometimes I wish I’d stayed, because leaving feels almost the same as being left.
13. I ask my cousin about her friends, hoping she’d mention how you are, I hope it’s nice where you are.
2. I can’t say this was my cousin’s fault, but sometimes I wish I’d never met you so I didn’t have to feel like there’s a void in my heart that is the size of the universe. You make me feel empty - no, you empty me, even now.
3. I let you under my skin, and inside my head and you found that it was too crowded with existentialism; I thought I had found my life’s meaning when you showed up, love seemed like an awfully good reason to be alive.
3. You told me to get over it instead of helping me get through it.
4. I left because you made it seem like you had no more reason to stay.
5. You chose your friends over me, I had to choose myself over you.
6. But wherever you are, I hope you’re happy.
7. Don’t think of me as an ex. Think of me as a practice dummy, a test run, so you don’t feel bad about hurting me. I had to teach you how to love, so you’ll know what to do when you find the right one.
8. Just because I’m not the one for you anymore, doesn’t mean I never was.
8. But was I ever the right one?
9. You said I was the best thing in your life, I didn’t think ‘right now’ lasted two weeks.
10. I still keep your Valentine card between the pages of Mockingjay when Katniss realised she loved Peeta.
10. I’m still writing about you, and you seem to be doing perfectly fine without me.
11. I still remember when you told me you were up all night thinking about me, and how terrified I felt.
12. My heart literally skipped a bit when we first held hands.
13. Sometimes I forget what I told you the night of our first kiss. I said: I will fall in love with you, you don’t have to love me back. I’m gonna give you all my heart. 4 seconds of insane and humiliating courage.
13. I’m sorry I expected more than you can give.
13. Sometimes I wish I’d stayed, because leaving feels almost the same as being left.
13. I ask my cousin about her friends, hoping she’d mention how you are, I hope it’s nice where you are.
