it's difficult not to feel so empty              
a glass of water less than half filled    
when you know                
there are so many girls/women                
boys/men                        
who are bleeding
because they're over it                
they don't care anymore        
they're spilling blood
on rooftops                            
in bathrooms                        
behind locked doors            
but yet                                                        
they all have reasons                          
you can't judge any one of them                          

this is one of the reasons
why i don't want to become
a mother                                
why would i hold                                      
a dependent baby inside me                    
when i'm dependent also                          
and the world will corrupt them anyway                      
like it has to me
where my mother, wouldn't know if i stained tiles

it's called bubble wrapping                    
overprotecting your children                  
so they grow up and can't handle the world    
but really                                                                          
maybe their parents are just too      
terrified                                  
of what happened to them,      
to let it happen to their dependent child                

the thought of becoming a mother                                              
is difficult to me                                              
i wouldn't want to ruin a new life                
i'd hate to know i didn't fix it                
even if i never knew, guilt at the world
corrupting a child
my child                
would be too      
much      
too bear.