I don’t want to be dead
But dieing
would be less painful then existing
That’s what you don’t get.
I don’t want your attention
With all my scars
They are there because
I got to a point where
It was so painful
That it didn’t hurt
And life was just a mess of words
And you were not even a thought
Because I was empty
And those scars
They fill with red
To bring me back
I do no do this for you
I do not do this for attention
I do this because in the moment
I would rather be dead
And Every time I fall into this moment
They get deeper
And I fear that next time
I may not wake up