Something less than love
by
Jude Kyrie

I was only five when she left me
just a little boy.
That long ago summer
when the heat
burned upon the earth
and also on passions.
Of those who could feel them.

she left us with the handsome
man with the big car.
since then even after all
these passing years
I have looked
and searched for a place
to lose my sadness.
It was an improbable  search

sometimes in the stillness of sleep.
I would hear the songs she
sang as I fell asleep in her comfort.
or feel her lips softly on my cheek.
To feel my tears wiped dry by her lips

I dreamt of her often
hearing
her almost forgotten footsteps
coming into my room.
I painted her beautiful face
in my mind indelibly
until time faded it to a blur.

Now I am man no longer
The  little boy
with torn jeans and.
***** tee shirt.
And aching heart

people say to me
dumb things like.
She is still out there
and thinks of you everyday.
With a mother's love in her heart.
You can't lose that ever.

I nod in concert with their thoughts.
I whisper sure or maybe.
But
I know that  inside of her heart.
it's something less than love.
yes for sure.
Something much less than love