some days, the tears threaten to fall.
other days, they command it.
helpless.
that's how I feel.
not even able to stand up against
mere drops of salt water.
how, then, am I to survive,
let alone stand up against the world
without help?
lonely's a friend.
ironic right?
the feeling of loneliness, my only companion
as I wander through the desolate field
that happens to be called life.
alone.
a word accompanied by laughter
and a fake smile
plastered on to defend the reality
that I don't even want to admit to myself.
how can I be alone?
I have family, friends, love.
yet I am so so alone.
I go through life without anyone by my side,
yet they still ask the dreaded question.
how can you be lonely when you have
everything you could ever want?
and I can't answer.
don't know how to.
so I leave it to a forced laugh and a smile
to say that I was kidding.
I didn't mean it.
how could I?
I have everything, apparently.
so the tears threaten to fall.
and I can't deny them,
just like I can't deny the ones
who say I can't feel alone.
I can't cry, supposedly.
it seems, however,
the tears didn't get the memo.
they want to race down my face
with no thoughts given to the people
who say I shouldn't cry.
Because I have everything, supposedly.
So the tears that once threatened to fall
command their exit.
and here I stand.
alone with my tears.
alone with my thoughts.
alone.