Sometimes I wonder—
Tossing, late nights—
Dark hair, dark eyes
Plainer than real
Printed in bold
On the backs of my eyelids—
Is this torture worth,
Are you really worth—

No! yells my angry
Heart, tired, worn-down,
Hands thrown up
Like Sisyphus’,
If his rock even was
Too heavy at the start

No! And none argues,
Only silence.

Next day you’re there—and
Weakly, No! forfeits
My desperate mind,
No! No! No!
My eyes must second
No! No! No!
My palms will to be dry, for
How could you ever be worth—

Then I catch you—
Smiling, the way you do
When you, and your sparkly little eyes,
And your mischievous dimples
All agree that nobody is looking—
Then, the question stumbles
Unfinished from my lips
And I don’t ******* care

I fall powerless, in love again
Every time you smile