the focal point of integrating into
english society
is learning how to have comic
value via sarcasm...

    bananas are gay!
               what?!
                                    they're bent!

show me a straight banana...
      i don't mind abnomartalities
in other fruits or veg...
  sure, cucumbers are straight,
and gherkins are bent,
   sickle, communist, islamic,
                             crescent moon...

wait, wait wait a minute,
  i thought you asked me to incorporate
into your culture?
   don't get the joke all of a sudden?
   can't be english then, even
if you're english...

  oh right, not enough *** / whiskey
running in your bloodstream...
go into the toilet and puke some kebab bits
out... i'm going to have another
shot with this cossack friend of time...

shore ahoy! "tipsy" sailor!
       in the gutter of a ******, or kissing
the ropes with a ****** loverboy...
  ****, the planks float, ****'s fine with me,
just don't you try to get it in my face,
i'm cool with it coming near my shoes...
but that's the limit, matey.

once again,
   show me a straight banana,
   and i'll show you pear curvatures in
an apple,
    and a mohican on a pineapple's tip
that's frizzy-afro hedgehog punk.

******* bonkers *******,
    you'd get more febreeze cool
   shouting: torro! torro!
      at nothing more than your own shadow
impressed against a brick wall.

- yo! brin'g'ah m'eh a'h boo'ket 'oath a'h
    tick-tack-toes!
- huh?
- t'oh-m'ah-twos!
- tomatoes.
- y'ah tum-tums.
- yeah, because a bunch of tomatoe throwing
   spanish freaks will **** that bull,
   when the toredor's blades didn't.
- mon!
- wha'?
- shee won' b' e noo'veil...
- **** me, i wasn't into hemingway anyway,
   the guy fish merlins off the coast
   of cuba, for all i care;
    i'd too take to a death in the afternoon,
    his finest "book",
    a shot of absinthe in a flute of champagne;
    i swear i almost mentioned veal.