He reminds me of magic -
child's eyes; quick, wise, fearful eyes
swallowed by folds on folds of time
How old he looks
the man with the child in his eyes
"Take my strength, Grampa"
a squeeze
              he knows I'm here
and a river of
  love  strength  frustration
travels up
  down
my
  our
arms
like an electric current.
Some ghosts photographs leave smiles on my mind
hugs like big, warm, heavy blankets
safe in Grampa's arms
still a little girl
        if I could take off this **** mask I could make him smile
Sliding down a razor blade in slow motion
     A monster that eats you up from the inside
        is scarier
than any
        hiding under my bed
shakes
shivers

timbers fall
even the strongest of old oak trees