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Apr 2016
Where’d you go?
Were you ever really there?
I saw you infrequently
Because you worked nights
And ****** strange women during the day
I knew at 6 years old
I was almost nothing to you
An excuse to visit that girl
At the ice cream parlor
Mom left
Because you couldn’t even be
A father
Much less a husband
How much I mourned
The loss of you
How many times
Did I cry myself to sleep?
No more tears left to give
Not just you
Mom too
Because you two were both
****** up
You didn’t know any better
At least I did
At least I waited
Waited until I was ready
Ready to be a father
To commit myself
To raising children
The park
The sports
The things we do
To give them good memories
Of us
And when you died
I could not cry
I could not shed a tear
For the loss of you
Once again
I had lost you too many times before
No more tears left to give
Maybe someday I’ll cry
For you
Right now my eyes are dry
For you
I have no more tears left to give
Axle Avatari
Written by
Axle Avatari  Northern California
(Northern California)   
393
   naǧí, gray rain and Kurt Carman
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