i've just been sifting through all our
"memories"
and i put that word in quotes because what it
means to me
is happiness and things worth remembering..
these "memories"
between you and me
aren't filled with such things..
for you maybe
but i'm stuck behind a glass screen watching 2 years later what happened.
feeling nothing but isolation and jealousy
callousness and darkness in my very bones
it's my nature to be depressed
and feel alone
and as soon as the tables turned
and i stopped caring
you'd change direction
and need me and crave me
but i had already changed course
stopped paying attention to what you'd do behind my back
discontinued my subscription on lies
scratched out all my faces in the pictures you had in your mind
because i was never really there
and if i were it was a shadow
i played the tree in the background
because i couldn't get a part on the main stage
so thank you
for leaving me behind
so that i could try and discover a new track
something called happiness within oneself
it's a book i've been looking over for years
but too afraid to look beyond the preface
thank you for noticing that i wasn't going to be there forever
and thank you for noticing too late