The Broom and the Shovel, the Poker and the Tongs, They all took a drive in the Park, And they each sang a song, Ding-a-****, Ding-a-****, Before they went back in the dark. Mr. Poker he sate quite upright in the coach, Mr. Tongs made a clatter and clash, Miss Shovel was all dressed in black (with a brooch), Mrs. Broom was in blue (with a sash). Ding-a-****! Ding-a-****! And they all sang a song!
II
'O Shovel so lovely!' the Poker he sang, 'You have perfectly conquered my heart! 'Ding-a-****! Ding-a-****! If you're pleased with my song, 'I will feed you with cold apple ****! 'When you scrape up the coals with a delicate sound, 'You encapture my life with delight! 'Your nose is so shiny! your head is so round! 'And your shape is so slender and bright! 'Ding-a-****! Ding-a-****! 'Ain't you pleased with my song?'
III
'Alas! Mrs. Broom!' sighed the Tongs in his song, 'O is it because I'm so thin, 'And my legs are so long--Ding-a-****! Ding-a-****! 'That you don't care about me a pin? 'Ah! fairest of creatures, when sweeping the room, 'Ah! why don't you heed my complaint! 'Must you needs be so cruel, you beautiful Broom, 'Because you are covered with paint? 'Ding-a-****! Ding-a-****! 'You are certainly wrong!'
IV
Mrs. Broom and Miss Shovel together they sang, 'What nonsense you're singing to-day!' Said the Shovel, 'I'll certainly hit you a bang!' Said the Broom, 'And I'll sweep you away!' So the Coachman drove homeward as fast as he could, Perceiving their anger with pain; But they put on the kettle and little by little, They all became happy again. Ding-a-****! Ding-a-****! There's an end of my song!
