I was abused as a child.
I'm haunted by my fear, my past
It felt like a horror movie, scariest the cast.

The guilt and pain embedded in my mind
natural like a clown in a circus. An animal on a farm.
He would say it was natural, he would tell me I was fine
But I was only I child, and he knew he was crossing a line

There I was stuck
Between being a child and being ****
Was it my fault, that it would feel good
Was it my fault that I didn't scream when I should

He was only two years older
And every time I said no, he would get so much colder.

I wanted out, it was getting too much
So he tricked me into his house
where he would hold me down for his friend to touch

I was eleven, and I couldn't stand up
So I started to scream as the panic kicked in
and if his friend was braver, if he hadn't said let her go,
I would have been *****, eight years ago