daddy was dead & i liked being used
I shoulda probly taken a shower
Rinse off the fog I drew on invisibility
   & youth
         & barrel gun'd eeyes
           that mirrored only dice
                & worlds of ice & rust
                          & sweet white dust
                                    & tattooed drums

                                                          their
                                            pumping           pain

                                                   into my
                                                     sweet sweat
                                                            16 yr. old
                                                                   frame
        there i was
                on some polar bear closed shop rug
                       midnight.
                             naked.  he had taken my
                                          clothes off.
                                           I didn't wanna ****.
            i wanted to cuddle this stranger
          cuddle the fluffy bear beneath my back
       under the body i refused to look @
               his hand on his belt buckle.  caching
                 zip.  daddies last breath.  1 blk

     away.  15 min.s   b4    here now i lay
                   prayers in the grave
                              men smothering my face
                                       unshaven memory.
                                             mind games.