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Pavel Chekov Sep 2016
Don't leave,
Please,
I don't want to be alone,

Don't abandon me,
Like everyone I've ever known,

I don't think you realise,
What's happening inside of me,
I don't mean to be vain,

But I thought you would realise,
I'm not that happy girl,
I'm not the bright one,
I'm not the one who will be here long,
No.

I'm the one who is sad,
The one who is worthless,
I'm the one who will die young,

But you wouldn't care,
I'm nobody to you,
I'm nobody to anyone
Pavel Chekov Jul 2016
as the darkness manifests inside
her heart gives out a cry,
it attempts to erupt,
it attempts to destroy,

the darkness is no joke,
it tears you apart,
you cannot escape,
you cannot hear a voice,
you cannot make a sound,

the darkness has decided to stay,
to corrupt,
to slowly,
ever so slowly,

bring you down on your knees,
to make you bow before it,
to make you kiss the ground,

because the darkness isn't a joke,
because the darkness arrived,
because the darkness decided to manifest it's self inside.

because the darkness took away your voice,
because you cannot hear a cry,

*save me
Pavel Chekov Jun 2016
everyday I ask the same old boring question,
"How are you?"

and everyday I get the same old boring reply,
"Alright"

everyday I know the same old boring story,
"No, you aren't"

everyday I get the same old boring excuse,
"I'm tired"

everyday I follow the same old boring pattern,
"Really?"

everyday I get the same old boring lie,
"I'm fine"

everyday I learn the same old boring truth,
"My friend doesn't like me"

everyday I ask the same old question,
"What happened?"

everyday I get the same old reply,
"They won't talk to me"

everyday I still ask them,
"Can I help?"

not everyday I get the same reply,
"Yes"




everyday I ask the same question,
"How are you?"

and everyday I get the same lie,
"I'm fine"

and everyday I know it's a lie,
"Please talk to me"

and everyday they never reply,
"Please don't leave me"

and never do I get that same old boring question,
"How are you?"

never can I lie,
"I'm fine"

never am I told,
"Tell me"

never am I asked the same old boring question.
the question that makes someone feel alive.
Pavel Chekov Jun 2016
a feeling,
so dark.

on a teetering edge,
slipping,
slipping.

falling,
falling.

a darkness,
you cannot escape,

the words hit you,
you fall further,

the darkness kicks you,
you still fall,

a hand,
you stop falling.
Pavel Chekov Mar 2015
The hollowness of my chest

The centre it sits

Growing each day

Its power manifesting

Nothing can fill it

It is an endless void

Created from the endless torment

Those who were my friends

Those who abandoned me



Those who carved out the pit and remain deep inside

What did I do to you?

What did I do to deserve this?

Teachers

The sickly sweet smiles,

As if they know my life.



They dug even further,

I did nothing

I obeyed

I listend

Family



Moulding me to who you want me to be

Something I can't

I'm sorry I am not perfect

I'm sorry my sister is

I am not you



The pit was completed

Everything buried inside

The last part created by my  happiness

Buried at the bottom never to return
Pavel Chekov Mar 2015
Silence

Nothing but silence



Alone

Alone in the time of need



Nothing

Sitting in the darkness of the world



No one to talk to

No one to understand



Left out

Thrown to the side

Ignored

Always

Always

Alone

— The End —