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Joanie Poston May 2013
I've tried so hard to escape reality
Music, running, sleeping
I fear the tears and anger night brings to me
I can't breathe, I can't turn it off
I'm trapped, I'm yelling, but no one is listening
I'm drowning, I'm alone, no one is there
It's pulling me deeper and deeper
I try to swim to the surface, but its got
ahold of me. Won't let go.
Joanie Poston Mar 2013
I try hard to see through the fog
But this storm is getting bigger
And bigger and bigger

It's ******* me in
Deeper and Deeper
I can feel the mud
It's burying me
With one last hope
I reach my arm out
Hope to be free
The storm
It takes me in
For the Win
Joanie Poston Feb 2013
I don't wanna write about
roses red violets blue
I want to write about
something unique
something new, just
like everyone else, so
they say. Everyone
wants to be different.
There's over 7 billion
people in this world.
Were all merely clones.
Even with this over-
populated planet we
live in, it's just so
funny to me how one
person can feel so alone.
Standing in a crowd,
listening to them all
laugh and carry on
watch as life goes on.
I don't want to be part of
a show, I don't want
fame, but I'll completely
take the blame. I would
like to live my life like
the sun. Gleaming by
day and resting by night,
but always there, safe
and sound to come back
the next day and light
up the world again.
Maybe that's all that
we need in life, some
music, love, and sunshine,
and everyone will be
just fine. Maybe this
persistent loneliness
I try to chase away,
asking why, then maybe
I won't be so shy and
take a bow and blow
all this a kiss goodbye.
Joanie Poston Feb 2013
You handed me a paint brush
Told me to paint you a picture
an hour later you came back
you asked "where's the color, the magic
the creativity." I said "art is whats in your
heart and mind. I've been searching
and searching but that picture you want
of roses, sky's, beauty and majesty,
its become really complicated to find.

You then gave me pen and notebook.
Told me write you a story. I told you a tale
of a knife, and a death. You then asked,
"why is this tale so ******, scary and
gory." I erased it all and tried again. I
wrote a love story. Quite the opposite
of Romeo and Juliet.I wrote the first
chapter, and everything there after
led to a happily ever after.

Then you gave me a guitar, and told
me to play you a song. I played a song
about a lonely heart and a girl who was
falling apart. You told me, "NO NO your
going about this all wrong!!." So sure
enough I  started playing the ultimate
love song. Surely I'll just play along.

But truth be told, the outlet was
unplugged, the ink ran dry and I spilled
the paint on the floor. Everything I
painted, wrote and sang for you, was
only from a girl that I once upon a time
knew. But she has seemed to cut the
ties that bind her together. Sprinkled
the ashes, till they blew away like a
feather. She watched in silence, from
a distance. The wind kept blowing,
the days passing, and thought well
maybe of these passing days, everything
is better off this way.
Joanie Poston Feb 2013
I'm searching the dictionary
Trying to find some kind of definition
Some kind of meaning
Turning pages frantically, searching
The answer must be there
I just has to be
For I am blinded
I can not see
The precious world that is presented to me
This is so unreal
That I can not feel
Is this an illusion?
All this confusion
Please I beg someone take my hand
Show me the way
Because I have no idea which way to go
Which page to look on
I'm just ready to hang up these shoes
I'm simply done looking for the clues
Joanie Poston Feb 2013
I have lost sight of the things in front of me
My pen has stopped working
I can not write what I see
I can not write of what I hear
I have lost all love of all that was dear and near

I can't understand
The workings at hand
I'm so far gone
Is there any amount of reaching
That could pull me back

I want to see colors again!!
To be bright to be bold!!
I don't want to be cold
This is so wrong here
I don't want to put my future on hold

Bring back the memories of childhood love and laughter
Bring back the happiness of a world once known
I want my heart to tingle
I want to be able to mingle
To have meaning
To be beaming
I don't want to hide
I don't want to just go along for the ride
I want to feel pride
If only I could put these useless feelings aside
Rest assured I don't want to die
But that's how I feel inside
Joanie Poston Feb 2013
Where am I?
I'm falling falling
Who am I?
I'm stalling stalling
What happened?
I'm drowning drowning
Someone took a knife to me
Cut me into pieces
Took out my beating heart
Fed it to the dogs
Nothing
That's what I am
Nowhere
That's where I am
I died
That's what happened
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