The disease engulfed her brain
with black ribbons and restraints

She tried to break free
but she was tired of the chains

Her body drained all hope
until she saw a special face

It set her free and she flew away
without leaving a trace

She couldn't remember the last time the sky was blue
And the grass was green

Her agonizing screams
Left unheard
All because you were at fault
For the scars under her sleeves
And the blood going down the drain

She longed for the blade to take her to the other side with
One
Swift
Slice

She tied the rope
Took the pills
Sharpened the knife

Yet still
No one noticed

Where is she now?

Still hanging
Just waiting
For someone to care
Just enough to bring her out of her darkness

The smell of burnt goodbyes
and strawberries
surrounded her

Battle scars displayed
down her arms
up her legs
across her hips

The smile on her face
didn't match
the blue in her eyes
and the red on her skin

She had lost the war
Her mind turned purple
and it all went black

When you've reached the point
Where you can't even cry
And you don't feel anything anymore

It's more frightening
Than the most sorrowful of sorrows
Because it means you've given up

One day when you're lost
And you do not want to live
Just remember me

When your heart stops, your brain still works for seven minutes
Seven minutes to still feel pain.

Then why is it that when your heart breaks, your brain continues to play the memories of us over and over?
An eternity to feel the pain.

do me this solid
and keep up with the

tired and over exhilarated
won't you ask me how im

learning to dig
inside my heart for my most recent

emotions are so awful they keep me
running for more and i can't

really see exactly where I'm
going to where im supposed to be trying to

understand how i feel is like
learning Chinese upside down, underwater, while having a tea party with an octopus

i guess ill just take the stairs and maybe i
could actually finish a

great deal of me feels
like i need to buy a nice looking

man and make him cook me spicy
omelets and he'll look quite **** under

my umbrella on the purple rooftops that i
decided to jump on my way to

work has been lowsy too many
people wishing for something and here i

am trying to finish a sentence i think
i might need to go back to grade school and take

an english course.

50% of the world resides in darkness
why do we keep running from it?
Embrace what comes in the night
grief,
death,
aging,
sagging,
anxiety,
fear,
the horror,
how it aches in my bones
                                                       because at times i feel so
                                                                                                                                 nothing
(lost in the terrain of my heart)

only through the darkness
can i see with clear vision
it is through grasping, hugging, holding and caressing all these grievances
that i can use them as a foundation, a step, to climb
higher
higher
higher

to finally see something
                                                and what is it,
                                                                                                  but only
                                                                                                                                                           the day.