you’ll start to wonder if
you ever made a noise
you’ll start to believe that
you never fell

because you were alone
in the woods that day
that you came crashing down

i think they were all
just too afraid to admit
that they were wandering
in the forest that day

i think it’s harder for them to admit
that they heard you fall

i think it's harder for them to admit
that they wanted to fall, too

i’m not happy

but i practiced forging
its signature
until no one could tell
the difference

it’s worth the risk
of burning up—

the chance
to sit on the sun
and watch you
revolve around me
for a change

she was
an odd kind
of suicidal

not manic
or depressive,
no—
she lived her days
to the fullest—
hopeful even

that each
would be her last

champagne bottles
litter the rock bottom floor
of a woman
desperately wishing
for enough bubbles
to make her float

she had the audacity
to create me
with her own existence

she had the audacity
to subject me to life
with the promise of her love

she had the audacity
to spend her life
putting conditions on her love

i had the audacity
to love in shades of pink
as well as blue

i had the audacity
to drink in shades of red
as well as white

i had the audacity
to live
as well as she created me to

i had the audacity
to destroy me
with my own existence

she had the audacity
to mourn a life she created
with the promise of her love

the audacity

i’ve always paid it forward

smiles and mercy
forgiveness and understanding

but making you feel crazy
for loving me
the way he made me feel
for loving him

that’s a debt you have
no business paying