Yesterday I played a song

for you over applause

last night I dreamt that you were here

arms open, breath and all

And I don't remember much except

you hugged me while I played

And I gave it all I had to give

so maybe you would stay

I remember how your hands felt on

me willing me to keep on going

playing over the applause

All restraint and shaking lost

tears to the piano flowing

I threw my heart into the keys

My life energy into the air

the rhythm became my heart beat

and you stole me standing there

And put me back where I belong

and I was never scared

at the sound of music I could breath....

Yesterday I played a song

for you over the applause

And I knew that you would love it

if you didn;t have to leave

but when I touched piano keys

I could feel you here with me.

She wakes in the morning
And climbs up the stairs
In the grey dawn pretends
She’s the only one there

She stands under water
And hides in its brace
Letting it burn her skin
Away from this place

She opens the door but
She keeps her eyes closed
She can't read the truth
Etched into the windows

She’s alone in a crowd
And she chooses to be
She’s afraid of the shock
If she set herself free

She’s scaling walls
One brick at a time
Fighting for a reason
To believe she should try

Too far gone she’s so Jaded
Without self-medication
But she's still star gazing'
She doesn’t know why

She knows that she has to
The empty persists
And it makes her feel small
Like she doesn’t exist

She floats through nirvana
On pavement and back
Gets lost under street lights
As grey fades to black

Her wheels turn slowly
Almost at a stand still
She feels like they'll stop
But knows they never will

Too far gone she’s so jaded
Without self-medication
But she's still star gazing'
She doesn’t know why

She knows that she has to
The empty persists
And it makes her feel small
Like she doesn’t exist

And she doesn’t exist
And she doesn’t exist
She likes it this way
Without a purpose

She’s gliding in grey light
And staying up all night
And everything’s alright
If she doesn’t think of it

Too far gone she’s so jaded
Without self-medication
But she’s still star gazing'
She doesn’t know why

She’s scaling walls
One brick at a time
Fighting for a reason
To believe she should try

She’s still star gazing
but she doesn’t know why
But she doesn’t know why

I find myself wearing
a fake heart on my sleeve

So people wont ask
for my real hearts key

In every action is music
in posture and poise
in the tiniest motion
the most beautiful noise

In your eyes I see lyrics
perfect rhythm and rhyme
funny thing 'bout emotion
it doesn't waist any time

In every person's a song
it plays loud and clear
but there always fighting
with the voices I hear

My fingers seem bound
To the strings of my guitar
hope these six little strings
can take my hands pretty far

My lyrics only as good
as the moral I teach
My music only as good
As the people I reach

I hope these strings stretch
so I know I can earn wings
I will learn soon enough
If this caged bird can sing

The child dies along with there dreams,
or so it does seem.
When reality is broken to bits
only the memory is what still exists
We cling to the ever fading image
like a dream rapidly receding with the dawn
parts and pieces slowly lost until the thought is gone
The bits and pieces left behind
are used in an attempt to reconstruct.
The moment that was lost in time
And blew away with the dust
In order to retain the moment
to capture it inside,
there must be something more to it
its so hard to define.

I wake up alone in a dark empty space,
time moved so quickly what is this place?
I've discovered me demons run ramped around this place,
And so I run until I find a familiar face,
One of few warm lights in a world cold as ice,
Other forces pull me away from the comforting light,
It thinks that its doing for me whats right,
But I'm lost int he dark when they pull me away,
Alone in the darkness, no way to **** them or escape.

Without saying the words -shhh-
without having all of the -hushh-

when there is no starting place, no finish line
no beginning or end no second time

without saying the words -shhh-
without having all of the -hushh-

When there is something so big, but nothing there, there is no hurt, no drawn out despair

without saying the words -shhh-
without having all of the -hushh-

In this world you will never need a single reminder,
no date it expires no title required

HUSH

The dust in the sky fades from purple, to yellow, to white
rapidly darkening receding wit the light
Your arm around my shoulder made me feel so safe, there was comfort, life
In a moment so close, to the overcoming night.
The stars faded and allowed some light to shine through
and the sky dust fell ton the earth in ac loud so still
In a bright spray of light, that even brightened up the strength of the dark in the night
The world now refreshed by a light rain of balance
Seemed to hide in the depths of all that confusion
The wonder and fear before it made it all clear
the point of the matter is that it was always here

The night surounds me
the thoughts start to drown me
they haven't yet found me

My world shakes,
i know the steaks,
before dawn breaks

I know the dangers
of loving close strangers
And I cant lose another day

The beauty of an insufficient dieing little thought
was once so strong and had potential
until in the mind web it was caught

The horror of an insufficient dieing little thought
could have stopped the world form war or the battl4e already been fought

Could have changed the world in fact it could have saved your heart
culd have stopped the last of seems from pulling loose, apart

The wonder of an insufficient dieing little thought,
How much it could have changed the world
the amaze it would have brought

The mind boggling distress of an insufficient, dieing thought.
What could have been what should have been
yet it went fling on the spot

Inflamed with thought of what a thought,
ever could have been
it could have been any thought, it could have been a sin

and even thought this thought may have
been one to change the world
it didn't last for long,
and now you must fully accept
the little thought is gone.

Can't feel his fingertips across my skin
Cant hear the steadying of his breath
I can feel the beating of his heart
It pulls me closer form the start till im all his

AS I run he pulls me closer
can't trust a thing he says
It just keeps getting harder
but I love him none-the-less

What keeps pulling me back in his direction?
I can live without his touch
I'm at a crossroads with my own reflection
One way is leaving the other is trust.

Don't make me one more promise,
unless its one your willing to keep.
Because you haven't kept but one thus far,
Now the hole you've dug yourself is deep,
And the mountain you have to climb is steep.
if it's really me that you want to keep.

Like a dream that fades with dawn
we rise up and it seems that something goes wrong
we lose sight and our dreams are gone

We seem to let go so fast
we forget where we're goin' and swerve right off the tracks
I'm tired of tryin' on masks

I think I know were I'm goin'
Know my way up the river I'm rowin
gotta always keep rowin' cuz' the river keeps flowin'

Ive had to make a choice like this before
in fact we all have at one time or another
leave your troubles be come sit and calm down with me

Come and try to come down from cloud 9
come and sit right here by my side
and we'll discover that life's exactly how we want it to be

Like a dream that fades with dawn
we rise up and it seems that something goes wrong
we lose sight and our dreams are gone

We seem to let go so fast
we forget where we're goin' and swerve right off the tracks
I'm tired of tryin' on masks

I think I know were I'm goin'
Know my way up the river I'm rowin
gotta always keep rowin' cuz' the river keeps flowin'

Ive had to make a choice like this before
in fact we all have at one time or another
leave your troubles be come sit and calm down with me

Come and try to come down from cloud 9
come and sit right here by my side
and we'll discover that life's exactly how we want it to be

There’s more to everything I think,

                                                                              Especially when it comes to you,

                                                                 Sometimes you make me feel so loved,

                                                        And others you didn’t know you’d hurt me.

                                                     But now that it’s all over does it matter at all?

                     When I look back I really

                                                                                     Think you loved me all along.

I can hear my loved ones screams
Reminents on memories
caught in the cobwebs of my dreams
I can't see them
I can't help them
And I'm stuck in the blackness of the dream
I try to open my eyes
And I struggle And to my surprise
I can  move
And I can breath
But I can't feel and I can't see
I hear them screamin'
screamin' my name
screamin' for my help
screamin' to my shame
And I'm trapped I'm all alone caught in the blackness on the dream
listen to them scream and scream and scream
And then  finally when I wake up
I am shaken that was ****** up
I am sweating under bedding cuz' I know whats comin' next
I've had enough

I'm not completely certain what went on inside my head,

But it sounded like a bad idea so this is what I said:

"Not right now, not today, I’m afraid afterwards what you'll do...”

What I said was no excuse, my words were true.

I can't believe after everything, after it all was said and done,

I couldn’t believe you’re not a predator,

God I hope I’m wrong.

Soon you'll be sitting on top of the world,

That’s what the fortune cookie said,

I went to his house with my hair uncurled,

Worried what he wanted was to get me in bed.

I am the butterfly, that once,

Floated just out of reach of you,

The hunter with the net.

You never once swung at me, hunter,

You stayed were you were, and waited,

For me to come to you

You turned your net away, sometimes,

And I'd flutter past your hands,

Then you’d hunt me again.

This is our little game we play,

So you hunt the right butterfly,

I want you hunting me.

The school years just beginning as the second quarter ends,

But I miss the days of summer when Id ride bikes with my friends,

What happened merely weeks ago seems like a couple months,

Though time is moving oh so fast,

I don’t find it hard to keep up.

My mind slips into a silent rest,

As your voice reminds me of the days we spent

Together.

In a quiet world of my very own,

Were thoughts and ideas are engraved in stone,

Forever.

A peaceful existence to slip into,

I realized my love for it while talking to you, this

December.

Please don't tell me that you love me more,

If you’re trying to start a game,

Because I’m afraid who’d win that award,

I hope we love each other the same.

Couldn’t shake the thought of him

Couldn’t loose the doubts and fears,

Needed something to get him off my mind

So I stuck the headphones in my ears.

The first song on as you and me,

Perfect timing I wanted to shout,

Then the end of the first verse started to play

As we drove past his house.

The chorus played as I remembered

My long and frantic search,

Then the bridge began to play,

As we drove past the church.

I'd assume that if you’re reading this

You are probably very curious,

As to why you cannot read this rhyme,

I just wanted to see if you'd take the risk.

Held inside a weakening grasp,

Why must time move so fast?

What was here just moments ago,

Now has died and grown stone cold.

What now we have is a memories shell,

Farewell nice moment, I knew thee well.

I love the pain,

That’s just it,

But without the blade,

here I sit.

I thank the one,

That helped me quit,

I miss the sting,

Yet here I sit.

I’ve rejected

The urge for pain

There’s only two things,

Keeping me sane.

The misty blue eyes that tell it all,

The story of a lifetime just a moment long,

Every single moment time’s weak and times strong,

One lifetime of listening to other's songs

The scratched up hands that give it away,

That scars and marks left from a thousand days,

Ruff palms and fingertips covered with clay,

Sign to no one in particular that it’s okay.

Sitting there silently crossing her legs,

She makes the sign an silently nods her head,

Silently she slips off the messy bed,

Knows her silent words can be heard, she can be read.

Please don't kid, about kids who cut.

I thought when you made the joke.

So I pulled up the leg of my pants,

And instantly my heart was in my throat.

And I was afraid, that you’d be mad.

Your reaction was to give the cuts a smack.

But I wanted you to know,

I didn’t want to take the action back.

But then you took me, close in your arms.

And I was happy I let you see.

I almost started crying when you said,

"Why would you do that Gracie?"

No angle sit on my shoulder,

Nor a devil with its fork,

They manifest themselves inside and my vision they contort.

My angles wigs are long and black, the soft feathers of a raven.

And behind hands all soft and white, hide claws long and misshapen.

So pretty and so perfectly sits a halo upon my head,

But my halos glow is not of gold but a radiant bright blood red.

It seems I am a devil more,

Each time I start sinning.

But if I still look like an angel,

Is the devil or angel winning?

I’m about to break a promise,

To one who's comforting words have made me cry,

One thing he might never understand,

Is why.

I wish I could tell you, I wish you could see,

But if I told you you’d take him away from me.

I have two secrets I’ve been keeping from you, one is purple one is blue.

These secret colors keep my world together,

A world with bindings delicate as a feather.

The purple secret’s who I really am, but without blue you wouldn’t give a dam.

You’ll probably never really know me,

Until your trust worthy and this you can show me.

The other secret the one that’s blue, I think you already partially knew,

You don’t know as much as you think you do,

But I really wish I could tell you.

The blood rushing through the veins of the ocean in a sea shell,

Welcome to the world that you just thought that you knew so well,

Welcome to the world were eyes void of color are crystal blue,

Were the best illusions you’ll ever see is the world that you view,

When people say the real world, they don’t know what they have said,

There’s no real world just as there’s no living and no dead,

Everything’s a construction of our arbitrary imagination,

Creating our own worlds, owning our situations.

Come sit with me on the bench,

In the mid-winter summer bliss,

And walk on the back like a balance beam,

And tell me things it never seems

That you'd tell anyone but me.

I'd run for you in the darkness, only the angel inside lighting the way,

and wrap my arms around you and hold you close,

and if my demons should catch up, and try to tare us apart,

ill just hold you closer, tighter, try and hold on forever.