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Rachel Jul 2015
how far do i have to
shove my face into this pillow
to push the thoughts of you
out of my ******* head
Rachel Jun 2015
i'm sorry i'm so late but i
ran into some traffic on 95
and there just wasn't much
i could do,
and i think i took
a few wrong turns
many so many too many wrong turns
a few blocks back and that held
me up even more.
do you think we can still catch the movie?
Rachel May 2015
the guilt
the guilt
the guilt
the guilt
the guilt
the guilt
the guilt
the guilt
Rachel May 2015
since the weather's been warming
up and everything's been blooming
again i got back to work on my
flower garden
and i planted each flower in a
certain order so
you can look at them
and hear a Marcy Playground
song play
i am truly the master of my own
destiny.
  Apr 2015 Rachel
Charles Bukowski
I met a genius on the train
today
about 6 years old,
he sat beside me
and as the train
ran down along the coast
we came to the ocean
and then he looked at me
and said,
it's not pretty.

it was the first time I'd
realized
that.
Rachel Apr 2015
looking at our relationship, things
just haven't been the same lately.
we haven't been fighting,
but there's less laughter,
less conversations,
just something isn't right.
is it me? i'm sure it's me, it's always
me.
looking down at this plate of steak and
asparagus, moving stuff around on
my plate, hoping you won't
notice, sharing no conversation
with you.
normally right about now i'd be lost
in your eyes, only i'm finding myself
lost in my own thoughts
this time.
"something wrong? you've hardly touched your dinner".
i quickly pick my fork back up,
trying so hard to
eat just a little more.
"oh no, i'm fine, just not too hungry
tonight".
i know i'm lying to myself, and i think that lump in your
throat says you know i'm lying too.
but still, we drive home silently, until you finally pull over
and ask me why i
seem so
sad lately.
i sit and ponder this for a second, thoughts and memories whirling
round in my head.
why have i been so sad lately?
well you see, when we first
fell in love,
i would kiss your cheek
all the time
and you always told me how much you loved it.
but now, you just brush off my kisses, tell me to wait a second,
you're just too busy right now.
i think that's what's making me so sad lately, but i just don't know how
to put that feeling into words.
so i just sit, staring out the window,
simply unable to
answer you.
and i think that might just be the saddest part.
Rachel Mar 2015
lately, i've been thinking back to
the night where we laid out under
the stars
for so long, your back left a dent
in the grass, and i wonder how you
could forget
a moment that was so precious.
and now, those same stars are covered by
storm clouds
and i'm raining hard.
and in the ocean i'm
making waves,
i started an avalanche in the mountains,
and in hawaii there's a
volcano erupting.
and there's a tornado touching down
somewhere, similar to the way you used to
touch me.
and also, the world's pretty much flooding,
all because i really *******
miss you.
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