The endorphins fill my broken mind,
the bleeding does not cease as the relief overwhelms,
my body convulses at the touch of the knife,
but the feeling is one of medication.

My mind is sick,
only to be healed by the small droplets falling from my wrists,
my pills a mixture of pain and happiness,
my heart beats loudly and my body feels weak

nothing will stop the feeling once it has started
no one will make me wish I had never pierced my flesh
my scars tell a tale of great frustration
years of being battered and left aside

My father non existent,
his replacement would make him choke,
without him I would not have spiralled
into this deep dark pit of depression,

he was abusive by nature but that's no excuse,
he ruined me for 16 years and im still ruined now,
left for dead on the side of the highway
a life saving operation I had rather left me dead,

Coming through the other side,
has yet to happen smoothly
and as I watch his evil eyes,
I collapse , never again to open my mouth

The Was a Girl who was always thinking,
She wanted to escape her mind,
She always felt trapped, Alone, Afraid, Depressed,
Everyday She hoped that she would find someone to take that all away,
She begged to her goddess for an angel,
To Take her away,

She was a normal Girl,
Quiet, Shy, Smart, Pretty, but in her eyes that wasn't what she cared for,
What she cared for was a boy who would become Her Man,
Who would make her Enjoy being who she is,
Who Would make her Smile every day,
Who would give her butterflies,
Who would make her blush and giggle in a Rose Pink joy,
She Went to school, and had her eye on a boy,
Though he could not be hers, she still Longed for him,

over time,
She soon began not to care, he was not the boy that she wanted to become Her Man,
Every day, When she got home love was all she wanted to deal with,
It was the only thing on her mind, She cared not for Home work, nor the  missing assignments,
Every time she was home, she wanted to leave,
To find the one Boy to become Her Man, to help her learn how to enjoy Life again,

Some Days she would take a nap,
Those days She dreamed of someone who held her close,
He would not let her go,
And She the same, She Could feel what love was,
She was In Love,
She looked upon his face, Seeing everything she could ever dream of,
and his kiss was all that she needed to feel alive,
But sadly...
This Girl awoke from her Dream...
And she went on again in life... waiting for him to come to life...
Knowing he was out there, Doing the same,
Dreaming of her,
and Giving all his heart and life to her.