charlie

charlie May 2014

My response to when they said they loved me.

I don't have galaxies in my blood stream. I'm insignificant and small.
I have nebulas in my eyes and asteroids inside me. Meaning I am nothing but stories that people want to know but I will never tell.
I speak in constellations with no connections yet I still tend to sound poetic. I spit planets because I get bored easily, and have 0 gravity zipping through my blood because I'm so bad at staying in one place and I am sorry. I am so sorry.

charlie Mar 2014

Words I will take.

No matter how big your heart is, or how much your brain waves flow, we all take our place in the ground. I'll take my stance, barefoot, and naked. With the sun on my back and wind on my face before I sleep in the dark. With my fingers no longer touching the grass, only...soil.

charlie Dec 2013

What i've learned from high school.

What i've learned in high school
is that happiness doesnt come in a 2 gram baggie.
That the first time you have *** wont be with the one who loves you.
You wont make honor roll,
and the nights you stay home with purple bags leaking underneath your eyes,
wont be the night you get any sleep.
The day you go into the library to find remnence of someone else written in ink plastered onto the page,
wont be the day you leave your mark on the school.
You wont be cherished... or remembered.

When you go to your first party people will be laced in green and brown with bloodshot eyes.
Not caring what your view on them is.
And when you're drawing in class because you're bored,
You might as well recieve your F now rather than later,
because you dazed off the whole semester.

And when you turn 18 and become independent,
You realized high school never prepared you for this,
Because just a few months ago you had to raise your hand just to go to the restroom.

charlie Dec 2013

Nelson.

I never wanted to see you hurt,
never crying, never unzipping your skin.
And I've only seen one of the two.

I said I loved you the month after we met and I meant it.
Because when you fall in love you do it hard.
And I wanted to have that feeling,
Never underestimating the feeling in your gut,
And I was okay with hurting you. For I didnt intentionally.

The night you fell in love with her you told me you never wanted to touch her,
But you also never wanted to loose her.

The night you lost her you cried to the heavens praying she'd come back...
And I still see you do it from time to time.

When you fell in love again, she said she wanted to *******, and that you could be on top, and my god did that ruin everything.
She unzipped her skin in the shape of a y exposing herself to you, but not in the way she wanted.
You did not pray for anything this time.

I said I loved you in my room, when I was blackening my insides, when I heard you say I love you too.

You wrote your first poem about the girl you liked yesterday, and I screamed at you.
For it wasnt about me.
But I saw you pray for the first time in months,
And I never seond guessed who it was about.
It wasnt about me,
or her
It was for you.
Because your getting weaker and I can see it. Because whenever you speak you speak in thorns, your voice doesnt perk up with laughter and baby giggles as it did before.

And I saw you do unzip your skin for the final time.

charlie Dec 2013

Player

Let's excuse the "playing rules"
Let's put our fingers down and unclench our hands
Because this is nothing but fake.
I loved a girl once without touching her.
I'll put it bluntly..
I never spoke to her again.
I liked a girl in whom I touched and we still talk from time to time.
I loved this girl at the age of 14. And I told the girl I liked that I loved her. In which was fiction.
I told the girl I liked that I can't live without her..in hopes I wouldn't be alone.
I told the girl I love "you can leave, I care more about you then I do me."
Never second guessing myself.
I wrote a poem about the girl I love the other day and realized that she's never coming back. And I am simply...okay with that. Let's take the player names off my identity crisis because I'm
Heartbroken
And hurt.
I'm not wearing your ******* name tag.

charlie Dec 2013

To do.

I could write about never kissing you
I could write about how you don't exist
I could write about the day you died
Cold,
And alone
But why waste my breath,
When yours is already gone.

charlie Nov 2013

Lavender arches.

This is not a depression poem,
This is not a cry for help,
This is me trying to be the best of my ability..for you.
You alway stuttered when you said my name.
You always picked at your collar and mumbled sweet words that I could never decifer.
You whistled in the park the day you opened yourself up for your own sake, and I cried.
This isn't a depressing poem this is me trying to the best of my ability to fix you.
You had to go in april to the place over the hill, where white walls flood and doors don't close. And I whistled for you to come home to me. Because I never wanted it to end like this.
This isn't a depressing poem this is me trying to pick myself up.
You said you didn't want to be my friend anymore, and explained you didn't know why, but that day I cried hard enough I swear god could hear me.
This isn't a depressing poem this is me explaining how much I needed you.