Again I find myself in an all to  familiar place
I sit alone quarantined in a room, peering out a window into space;
I replay my mistakes over in my mind
And when I've seen it all I hit rewind:

There must have been something that I've missed
There's got to be a reason that you'd treat me like this;
I've told you before that I'm yours to destroy
I never thought you'd discard me like a child's broken toy:

I sit alone in this dark empty space
Always knowing how easily I could be replaced;
Yet every day, you fed my ego with words of hope
Then you shut me out and shot me through the heart, no scope:

But I play brave and put on a smile
Even though I haven't hurt like this  in a while… and that's fine;
I just look down at the wound and the scars
And as a tear starts to form, it glistens like a star:

I thought you knew how I felt, you said
But the silence I get I feel like the waking dead;
And there's no longer dreaming with my eyes wide shut
They've all been entombed like king Tut:

And when they are released I'm the one whose cursed
My life is a tragedy written by Shakespeare, a play I've rehearsed;
I keep lying to myself that there's something more
But in the end when they find me I'll be lying on the floor:

I  feel like I'm in mourning, but don't want to come to terms
And our lack of communication only adds fuel to this fire that burns;
Our limited time together already puts our love in a fragile state
And with us not being able to talk daily is it going to be, do not resuscitate:

The old saying that we've all heard is a lie
Distance makes the heart grow apart, I cry;
I walk around  prown and apathetic
A walking cliché, I hear the whispers he's so pathetic:

I send a love note with my latest confession
I wait for your reply, it's at your concession;
There's no new way for me to sing the blues
So like a jaded cop I think I've paid my dues:

I should wire my mouth shut to keep from shooting blanks
But what's to keep my hands in check from breaking ranks;
They grab the familiar pen and pad
What am I supposed to do, I jot down the ugly , good, and bad:

And in my absence will you turn to another, hoping they can do what I do
And when you think of me, say to yourself, he would have laid on tracks for you;
And I'll continue to write, saying to myself I hope this gets to her
But I genuinely hope I'm wrong and this poem becomes non-sequitur:

My heart is split
It's been this way the last few October's
Then you came along
I finally thought that this pain was over
You smiled and said
I no longer had to be blue
But that was just a mirage
I'm so broken without you

All I want is another Sunrise with you
You gave me a reason to fight
But all I've got was this hole in my chest
And it's empty without you, empty without you

Am I destined to spend my lifetime alone
Reminiscing of our last time
I keep a bottle of Jack and loaded gun nearby
In case I want to die
I take a walk with the devil
The pale moon light shows I  am restless
The tears flow so I keep my head down
Otherwise you might see I'm defenseless

All I want is another Sunrise with you
You gave me a reason to fight
But all I've got was this hole in my chest
And it's empty without you, empty without you

I'm sorry if I may seem distant, because I am
And it's really quite all right if I'm hurting and you don't give a ****;
I shared myself with you and told you things I may like
And you not remembering them,  is me being selfish right:

It's not that I need you to know every single detail
I should have kept my mouth shut, instead of having you fail;
At first I was just being coy, and wanted to see what you really knew
But the more I asked the sadder I got, like how my favorite color is purple no longer blue:

Or did you know what my fears were, because we both share heights
But I'm also afraid of the entities that watch me when I turn out the lights;
And maybe I'm just being paranoid, that I'm not worth your time
But I've shared myself before and now I'm far from fine:

They say the little things matter the most in life
So when you forget them, I won't lie it cuts like a knife;
I feel like I should have never said anything in the first place because I'm forgettable
But you made me feel I wasn't, then proved me right thats regrettable:

Or maybe I've blown this all out of preportion
And telling you my feelings through these words are extortion;
But you want to know why I'm hurting, the answer is plain as can be
The only question is do you really know me:

I can tell by looking in your eyes
That you're punch love drunk, don't lie;
It's ok I'm a bit tipsy myself, as I say come over
But will you love me when you're sober:

Will you still have that same look
When we argue over who has to cook;
And will you still think about my smile
Even when I'm sad and you haven't seen it for awhile:

Will you remember all those times I made you laugh
As you listen to the words of my epitaph;
And will you think about my soft touch
Even as we get older and don't make love as much:

I just don't want you to wake up one day hungover
And when you look at me, think about us being over;
That's why for the rest of my life I'll drink you up
So I can stay drunk, I won't need another cup:

My vision is blurred as the sweat drips down
Breathing grows harder, a rasping sound
Muscles are in spasm switching from taunt to relaxed
I feel myself pushing to near collapse
But I hear you scream out to me
I continue pushing in what can only be called a dream
Flesh to flesh, I'm trapped in Eden's walls
I cry out in lust, this is the end and I fall
I say you're everything to me
But can only think of myself, one last plea
Lost in ecstasy for tonight
This is the bitter end, one last goodnight

I daydream as I walk in the forest among the trees
And imagine your touch as gentle as the summer breeze;
I close my eyes and absorb the suns rays
Its warmth, nothing compared to yours on winter days:

Listening to the birds chirp as they do their mating dance
Your visage in my mind is starting to enhance;
I smell the moss, grass, and flowers, natures perfume
Nothing compared to your scent, I inhale  deep and consume:

And I hear you call out my name and whisper, be with me forever
As quietly as leaves rustling in a zephyr;
But it's just a daydream as I walk in the forest among the trees
And I continue to imagine your touch as gentle as a summer breeze: