warm wind tunnels full of water lilies,
filling my cottage with fumes of nature,
fresh baked goods prepared in my kitchen,
the hum of inaudible voices echo through thick log walls,
silence fills this place as my phone dings in the far corner,
the smell of flowers and warm cookies fills the house,

gripping onto wood and string,
pressing and strumming as the peaceful vibrations fill the house,
I sea the occasional passing car as it shakes the entire house,
distant sirens exit and enter my ears,

I fill at home in this stillness,
another ding comes from my phone in the corner,
I walk into my kitchen and pour a cup of tea,
raw honey,

the table is stacked with board games,
the game system sits in the corner,
another ding,
succulents fill the shelves,

it is peaceful, hear...

‪there are people i thought i was close to,
friends family etc.
Now they act as if I don’t exist,
as if all my memories were a hallucination.
I write them letters with no response‬
I hesitate to reconnect
because speaking to the seemingly dead,
destroys my peace

what is solitude?
a cocoon of iridescent
paintings of oil on bulletproof walls
mama’s warm embrace in fetal form

a prison of darkness
where no one knows your face
where reflections are only imagined
where hands are far from reach
and reality is...

a place where beauty is created
creation is sentence
and sentence is desolation

childbed

this feeling is a place of escape
absence in stagnant emotion
blank space
a feeling of regret in cloudy white
fog on a warm spring Monday morning

it has become cold
but not for all
only for your reflection
a bulletproof window

wasted time on marble floor
sand trapped in a room
seeping out a window to reveal sunlight

a beach of perfection but pollution
sharks all around me
as i watch from the bars
yet a beautiful clear ocean

thriving life and vivid colors
i hear the hum of distant whales
but my lungs overflow with water

conditioner in my curls
in need of a thorough rinse
and i in need of the ocean