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Daniel B Mar 2018
This is not just a text,
This is history of my life,
Please listen to me,
I need to pour out my ****....

I am grew up in a poor, large family,
Sometimes there was not enough money,
Parents could not pay much attention to me,
And I, without having an upbringing and a brain
I am did not become what I am would like to be.

I'll start with elementary school.
I was subjected to bullying and beatings,
On the part of classmates,
This wounded my child soul for six years,
Until I beat those *******,
Which became me then "Friends."
Even teachers hated me for my poverty,
And for the fact that I could not afford normal clothes!

And now the most interesting ... my high school.
It all began at the time of the transition from the fifth grade to the sixth,
It was summer,
I agreed to take a walk with an unfamiliar girl and go "drink tea" to her home,
But we did not drink tea, we drank alcohol,
And when I was already a little drunk she started kissing me, ******* me,
Then she undressed herself, I first saw a female *****,
And then she sat down from above, and at first it was scary,
Then it became nice, but she ***** me as she wanted!
I became a pervert
Because of that ******* *****!
A little later I got into a bad company,
We were engaged in hooliganism,
And then I was betrayed, and I got into the police.
I began to get drunk every day,
And two years I was alcoholic,
In passing I am tried all sorts of ****,
Became addicted to drugs
****** with girls,
(From one I have a son)
And abandoned his studies.
It was a difficult and fun period of my life.

And now the ninth grade and the first year of college!
Over time, I was fed up with the rackety life,
And I found a permanent girl,
I loved her, and I was ready for anything,
I am even stopped using drugs and alcohol!
Although we often quarreled,
Sometimes we could not be each other,
But we could not do without each other either,
And, according to the law of the genre, one day we had a lot of quarrels,
I tried all the weekend and apologized,
When I saw her last time we even had ***,
And the next day she left me!
And now I miss her, although it has been almost a year ago,
I returned to a past life,
But not happy, as it was before.
And fate has more gifts for me,
I just can not forget it,
And if I forget, then somebody will just remind me of it,
Or she will write ...
But...
How will be, so will be.

At the time of writing this text, I'm only seventeen.
Daniel B Mar 2018
You know, I never dreamed about it,
Sitting, writing, thinking
To come up with these texts,
I always dreamed of another life ...

I dreamed of being a programmer
Ever since childhood,
I studied programs, computer,
But when I wanted to go to college,
They told me: "You have a three in computer science."
So my first dream collapsed.

In my heart I was a writer,
And I can combine words into strings,
A strings into a couplets,
And I typed skills with every text
Was getting smarter,
But I do not have a voice!
So my second dream collapsed.

The third dream was my personal family,
But for this dream there is no place to be,
After all, no one will endure my bad character,
And nobody looks at me ...
And I do not want to see anyone.
There is no more room for feelings in my body.

And after all this,
Having lost faith and all hopes
I, like a log in the river,
Began to go with the flow,
And to hope for "God," but I'm not a believer ...
And I got confused in days,
After all, as in the movie "Groundhog Day"
Everything repeats again and again!
Again the same thoughts,
The same pain,
The same teary rain
From my eyes.
Daniel B Feb 2018
Every day I went to bed and woke up
With the thought of you,
And that we will again become a couple,
And so it was half a year ...

After your leaving I began to get drunk,
Became a ******* addict,
I began to think about of suicide,
But I'm strong enough,
And I can survive all this ****.
Though I became more aggressive and depressed.
~ I became smarter,
You made me stronger,
You made me better,
Than I was,
And on this I say to you:
"Thank you for leaving
******* *****! "~
Yes, maybe it's rude,
But I'm still mad at you,
And you're against me, too,
And it's very funny,
After all, we turned the word "Love",
And changed one letter
Turning it into "evil."
And now we are like a bomb and detonator.
We ready to destroy everything,
As soon as we see each other.
That's why we do not want to see each other.
Hah...
But thanks to you...
~ I became smarter,
You made me stronger,
You made me better,
Than I was,
And on this I say to you:
"Thank you for leaving
******* *****! " ~
Many will criticize this text,
Because I write it not for people,
And not about the ******* problems of society,
And I'm writing exclusively for you.
I write about myself,
And about you,
About our relations,
And about what happened in the end.
I write about what it is worth keeping silent about.

— The End —