magenta had a new shade
she never knew how or when

magenta wore her today
she did not know it either

magenta stopped being a color
she's running and ran her tint
all over me

i see you
opening your eyes
out of your sleep
a familiar touch

there's no trace
of me in your thougts
waking up without me
is this the end?

the warmth in your bed
is of your body alone
no fragrance
of our love

as the morning sun
comes up on you
i m dissapearing as quick
as a ghost

did you know
how incredibly difficult
it is to just look at you

did you know
i could not
see much further
than your eyes

did you know
i choke to get words out
out of my parched throat

of course you know now
for i see the smile form on your face
as you read this

so i tell myself, i can survive this
and this heartache is nothing
but an affliction of love

its just a few hours
no communication
i had taken you for granted
thought it was my ration

time it stops still
i struggle to just go through
a time i cant ****
waiting to hear a whisper from you

shes packing her bags
her thoughts and feelings too
shes going away
maybe this will change a thing or two

her hair falls on her face
as she puts clothes in her case
her lovers hover around
they dont seem to get enough of her

the sideway glances
the messages on the phone
shes knows someone out there
feels all alone

i can't bid adieu or say good bye
i just have to hold my breath
till she says hi...

this moment is but a thought
already passed and free
to be whatever it wants to be

but those who are coming in soon
bring me a lot of hope and warmth
of unsmelt flowers full of glee

oh how i ache to make time stop
to fill myself with the falling drops
of cloudy breezy days
those lazy ways of promises

sitting alone
in this garden of stone
everything so heavy
almost too much

demons of the past
lurk in the woods behind
the sky a dull grey overcast
guess i m losing my mind

i get up to take a walk
dont know which way to go
and theres no one but me
a chill goes through my spine

its only me. its only me
and now i know i cant get free

linger.
for this is never happening again.
linger.
for this is all it that could have been.
linger my dear.

cold hands. warm feelings.
hot flushes. cold sighs.
tear me down. put me together again.
you glances weaving through

linger. for this is just love
between two lost souls

sober. i am feeling sober.
the fuzzy heavy head's gone
the distance. i think it helps.
but the ache. its still there.

lighter. i feel lighter.
all that gravity, the weight
pushing me towards you.
i guess its all i want.

conversation. what conversation?
i dont recall a ******* thing
that breeze through the car window
the moving lights. deep piercing eyes.

we had a moment, you say
eternity did you mean?
we had something going you felt
was i even breathing then?

now that i am coming to
i think i have been had
your sinister evenings with me
were the best i ever had

why do you leave your preys half eaten
is that a cosmic tease?
i am trying to still figure
if i m alive or deceased

why do they call it
making love

when love
makes us do all those things

I don’t want to speak with you
I don’t want to see you
At all.

For I am unable to see anything else
Unable to hear anything else
Can't taste anything else.
Can't feel anything else

I don’t want to speak with you
Our conversations are still ringing in my ears
Your fragrance still lingering in my heart

Is this how the toxin works
Not through my veins but on my thoughts
Is this how the spell binds
Through a maze of your eyes

I dont want to speak with you
ever again
For the word again"
ceased to exist the moment i met you

dust. grime. and a lot of time.
staring out through the window
of rusty squeeky chariots of mice
holes ditches people honks shouts

yes this is the good life
this is what we traded our past for
steel and glass. angst and sighs
lust and wine come to save our ghosts

pieces thats all thats left of me
i am trying to put myself together
the blood and veins and skin
doesnt work

pieces thats all left of you
i try to put you together
but its not you
its looking like me

maybe i need
to put our pieces together
and see us from above

i think its making sense now
****. this must be love!

the cord umbilical
the finger of our father
the hand of our lover
the hug of our child

something to hold on
someone to hold to

the kiss from a mother
the pinch from a sister
letters from a stalker
the stolen glances from a distance

something to remember
someone to remember

the hurt from a lie
the arguments and the cries
the bruises from a monster
the doubt in the eyes

something i dont want to remember
something i have held so far

for now i have got you
all that is left in me
are the memories
of bliss coming my way

waking up
thinking of you
wondering
how you look in your sleep

maybe you are curled up
in a warm quilt
or in a warm embrace
of my guilt

i can trace the outline
of your lips
your glowing face
and your arched hips

oh how cruel your slumber
how deaf your ears
did you not hear
my loving sweet nothings

i just cant sleep
i cannot breathe
i am awake here on the other side
the dawn incomplete

you lied to me
about who you were

did not tell me
that you were the morning dew
waking me up

with the sweet drop
of your love

its been a day after you left
an accident scene
a victim who was run over
to smithereens

no no there was no blood
no gory sights either
i think you know what i mean
you were the not so grim reaper

that thick quilt does not work
it does not feel right
it does not give me
my lover's caresses or her bite

that thick quilt does not cover
or touch all those places
that belong to my lover
they are empty spaces

that thick quilt does not shield me
from my love's piercing stare
at my naked being
although there is nothing bare

take this hand
take it with you
take this soul
take it with you

i am mixed in your colors
i am mixed in your shades
of mixed emotions
running in your head

i can still feel the texture
of your feelings
its ok to breathe baby
its ok to feel alive

i cant say i dont miss you
i can still feel your warmth
cuddling into my arms
And looking up into eternity

being with you.
being myself with you.
being. just being.
i m here.
where i have always wanted to be.

seeing you.
seeing you with my hands in yours.
seeing. just seeing.
i see.
what i always wanted to see.

thinking of you.
thinking of the cross roads
connecting our parallel universes
i cant think anymore.
but i know i found a flicker in your soul.

the days of morons and assasins
are here to tell us
stories so macabre
that the ghosts get the chills

for our children will know
that hell is where you are born
and heaven is just full of bright lights
and dark nights

morons of religion. morons of faith
who just want one god
made of hatred and pain

the book of the morons
has a sharp edged blade
for one who reads it
does not understand whats said

blow them to pieces
shoot them to shreds
for these are our children
and its your right to make them dead

you say your god is better
that my god is not there
i think i agree
for if he was here
then my child would still be here