Sean M Havens: Poems

311 · Feb 2019

Temporary

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

A moment to forget
A lifetime to pay
Monsters under the bed
A memory to slay
A moment of regret
A dream whisked away
A breath that is shortened
Never to see the new day

144 · Feb 2019

Tried

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

Tried

I'm the one who broke her heart
I'm the one who played that part
I can't deny what I've done
I didn't do it just for fun
Cruelty is a special skill
I never found in it any thrill
But there have been those who did it well
They know how to hurt me and put me through hell
I didn't walk the line to make her sad
I didn't do those things to make her mad
I just got tired of hurting deep inside
The things that were done made me run and hide
Hate is a strong word but I can't deny
Honesty is what some want but it's just a lie
They only want to hear what they want
Everything I said is still here to haunt
The pain started a long time ago
I tried to endure it, but you just don't know
How it tore me down inside and out
Made me wonder what it was about
And trying to be friends is the hardest thing to do
When I'm blamed for everything making her blue
I can't seem to seperate what was done
Trying to be everything when I'm only one
Can't make it all go away, won't even try
But there's a friendship starting to die
I'm not the same as I used to be
There are parts of my soul I'll never again see
And hard as I try to make it come back
I can't bring it forth, I cut myself no slack
So here I'll sit and wonder why
Did this part of me have to die?

122 · Feb 2019

The Quarrel in My Mind Jan. 3, '91.

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

The Quarrel in My Mind Jan. 3, '91.

Things are getting louder
Louder and louder by the minute
And if I'd mind to listen
The voices would be infinite.
Yet, sometimes when I'm tired
The sleep takes all control
I dream the voices are all laid out
Before me in a neat row.
So I argue with myself
Always back and forth,
But since I do not choose to listen
I don't know what the words are worth.
And if it were up to me
To settle up this fight
This quarrel in my mind
Would continue on all night.

117 · Feb 2019

I am...

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

I am...

I am your creation

For you and no one else

I am at your mercy

To take whatever is dealt

My passion is for you

You and you alone

Others have had but a fraction

Of this thing that has grown

I am your slave

Willing to take your best

My focus has been for you

Never for the rest

I am your man

Destined to walk beside you

For you I would **** and die

Nothing I wouldn’t do.

115 · Feb 2019

Question

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

Question

What if I told you
there was something you didn't know I knew?
What if I told you
that I was there and I'm on to you?
What if I told you
I thought I'd seen it all?
What if I told you
that this was the last call?
What if it were
that I had seen the signs?
What if I had
been at the right place and time?
What if I knew what you think I don't know?
Next time would it be easier to go?

113 · Feb 2019

.What it's like.

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

.What it's like.

There are those moments, the ones I can't stand
That drive me insane, twisting me into a mad-man
Hard as it may be for you to understand
I burn within like molten sands
What it's like to be without you
Is like death warmed over or a sky without blue
A heart without a beat, a flower without scent
A tree without leaves, or not knowing what was meant
What it's like without you is a constant aching inside
A pain never-ending, a rule I won't abide
What it's like has no feeling, so I try to run
To get away and it can, to finally be done
When you're here to take away my fears
To hold, hold me close and give me cheer
Only then could I never complain
Only then will there be an end to the pain.

111 · Feb 2019

Ice

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

Ice

Prizes atop the mountain high
Tell of gold and jewels and where strong men die
Yet, he was different than the rest
His honor tested as the very best
In that cavern he did trod
Wielding his sword and barely thawed
A ghostly beast lurched from the frost
Demanding a toll, a life it would cost
The warrior fought slashing with might
Was his power in courage or more of fright?
His strength and skill is all he would need
That's when he felt the ice crawl up to his knees
A moment longer and he gasped
His scream was merely a breathy rasp
His heart beat fast and his blood coursed slow
Why he came there he did not know.
So tales of prizes atop a mountain high
Of gold and jewels and where strong men die
And a young buck will think he's the best
And his corpse to soon adorn a cave like all the rest...

107 · Feb 2019

The Spy

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

The Spy

Knowing who I am
With my life that has been sorted
The past I try to forget
That's twisted and contorted
I know what I am
And how I'll always be
You might be like this, too
If you could see what I've seen
My trust is a commodity
I don't pass out with ease
Because in the past I've found
Trust floats away in the breeze
So I spy on you
I see your every move
I see where you've been
And I also know with who
I've read your words
And made my own notes
The file in my mind
Can fill a hundred totes
So I spy on you
I don't wonder anymore
I know what you've done
And what you've done it for
Who is my spy?
Who watches what I do?
Who knows what I've done?
Could it be you?

100 · Feb 2019

Here

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

Here

Without a doubt you are the one

And when this is all said and done

I stand beside you, thick and thin

With our love we can only win

Don’t be afraid, I am here

Together there’s nothing for us to fear

I am yours, and you are mine

I’ve known this from the beginning to the end of time

Troubled waters that are ahead

Are nothing for you and I to dread

Without doubt, without fear

Don’t be afraid, I am here.

100 · Feb 2019

For You

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

For You

To press your lips against mine
To hold you close for the rest of time
Hazel eyes that pierce my soul
Our hearts together have finally made me whole
Trembling, I was, to first see you
Now the world trembles for what I would do
To wake each morn with you in my arms
To protect you from everything, keep you from harm
I am yours, for no one else

These are the cards that I’ve been dealt

Our pasts are what they are

We are what we’ve become, we’ve traveled so far

My promise is this and I will hold it to you:

From this day forward I will always be true

Never to be weak or ever to stray

This is my oath until the end of days.

99 · Feb 2019

How I will...

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

How I will...

How I will survive

Is dependent solely upon you

For without your love

There is nothing I can do.

So to trod upon this earth

With my boots made of leather

I will need your heart

To withstand any weather.

I will stand tall as I might

With chest stuck out proud

And with the voice of a titan

I will proclaim out loud:

“Here is my love!

For her and no one else

My passions cease for the masses

But for her my guard will melt!”

These are but just words

A simple phrase or two

But, if you’d mind to listen close

They only have meaning for you.

98 · Feb 2019

Tick Tock

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

Tick Tock

The days used to be longer
As a child I remember it this way
Summers were forever too short
Leaving a longing for the last school day.
Forever, it seemed, for a year to come
Another marker to pass
A birthday so far beyond
And waiting 'til the very last.
The sky was once bluer
I remember it used to be so
Different from now the hue
It all passed so slow...

Yet, a tide has turned
A breath has been lost
A freedom is gone
What was the cost?
An innocence gone
A right proven wrong
The clock moves forward
And for those days I still long...

It makes sense to those
Who choose to look inside
To understand the message complete
And to never deride
What comes is to come
No regret or revelation to rely
Time is an enemy and your only true friend
And this we cannot ever deny.

95 · Feb 2019

A moose loose in the hoose Oct. 1. 1997

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

A moose loose in the hoose Oct. 1. 1997

I feel pity for the mouse
Who fell into my bathtub
Moments after I filled it with water
To prepare for my soak and rub.
I watched him swim
For such a very long time,
How he struggled for his life
Which to me is not worth a dime.
He chewed my papers,
And stole guitar picks,
And when food was out
I'm sure he chanced a lick.
No love lost
Between this man and beast;
Are there mice in Heaven?
I really don't care the least.
I took a stick
And whisked him under;
Coming to my tub
Surely this one's ultimate blunder.
He breathed his last,
This fiend no more be,
And with one final flush
I buried him at sea.

95 · Feb 2019

WAR

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

WAR

WAR Nov. 8, 1987.

Father, can you forgive me
For I have committed sin?
I haven't lost a battle
But still, I cannot win.
I look across the land
All of the grass has been burned
I have educated men to ****,
Yet, there's something they haven't learned.

Father, please forgive me
For I have done wrong
I've raised weapons against men
Whose lives might have been long.
I've destroyed all humanity
In this once happy place
And I see the damage that I've done
In each and every face.

I beg forgiveness, Father,
For I have killed my brothers
And I've not an idea
The pain of those left over.
For in my mind I see the words:
That 'Thou Shalt Not ****',
But, Father, it was war
It wasn't for the thrill.
THEY said I'd be glorious
THEY said I would be a hero
But THEY aren't pulling the trigger...
...I suppose they'll never know.

88 · Feb 2019

If Stuart were a Coward July 19, '96.

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

If Stuart were a Coward July 19, '96.

He walked into his beloved's room
And swept the floor with a broom,
A broom made of bone and hair
And with the same he constructed a chair.
This chair he sat upon and he cried
Wondering when his sanity had died
He rose to his feet and paced the floor
He knew that he could go on no more.
So he took the blade that he used to ****
And remembered that there was no more thrill;
Across his wrists he did cut
And then, once again, he cursed the ****.
"My love," he whimpered as life dripped away,
"You've betrayed my trust for the very last day..."
Then he slumped dead into that chair
Made of bone, cushioned with hair.

80 · Feb 2019

Carnal

Sean M Havens Feb 2019

Carnal

So long I have remembered some things
The touch of her hair and the promise of rings
Passionate gazes of longing for more
To love a woman as a blissful chore
Rampant and rapid the kiss lingers
Touching the flesh with nimble fingers
The wet of lips swollen and ready
The taste of wine and the rhythm steady
The feel of a faint and building urge
A sensation deep within wanting to purge
Glistening sweat on figures through the night
Collapsing together beneath moonlight
The tickle and tingle yet returns again
Creating ecstasy between woman and man.

— The End —