time ticks
and never stops
today we're here
and soon we're not
the clock talks back
you can hear it ticking
but present becomes past
the closer you listen
and when you look back
you'll think "oh my"
you'll check your watch
and say "look at the time"
because time ticks
and it never stops
and one day we were there
and now, suddenly
we are not

love is strange in that
it dyes its hair every week
wears too much makeup
but tries to be discreet
it can sneak up on you
or be so obvious its more of a glare
it can be welcomed and expected
or feel more unfair
love is strange in that
i can never tell when its here
im always looking far away
but shockingly love is always near
its in the cracks of the sidewalk
the spoon that which i eat soup
it sits right next to me on the bus
and looks a lot like you
it holds my hand when i cant sleep
and i feel it when you call my name
and even if i've known love before
those now dont feel the same
this love is different
more joy, less pain
i hope your love is the final version
i pray for this love to never change

my body grows with age
stretches, rolls, shapes
my body breathes and expands
fills up bowls and plates
it can brave tides
soak up sun
with unchanging eyes
and a sharpened tongue

but i pull apart the crafted curves
pick at every scar
cover up till it's all unheard
and wish on every star
wish for a smaller body
a bottle with a stronger cap
this one is too overflowing
and i dont know what to do with that
i want a better bottle
with clearer, glistening skin
i want a better box
to keep all my inside stuff in

but i guess there is a beauty
in a container so uniquely me
crafted by a Creator so intentional
He left clues of all my pedigree
and so I pour out all complaints
and lay them to dry in His sun
for He makes no mistakes
thus my body can't be one

can i just
stay here
pooling in our memories
can i stay lovesick
sincere
and look for no remedy
can i love you forever
even if you wouldn't know
can i just miss you dearly
and love you alone

you're picking up the pieces
of a heart you didn't break
witnessing this damage
all cracks are on display
you're tripping on wires
set up for different feet
you're walking on eggshells
and you cant miss a beat
if you do there'll be a flood
greater than any have gone through
and you will wipe away the tears
none of which are for you
and you'll have to hear their name
come up every now and then
and hear your own heart break
over and over again

in another time
another place
there is a version of me
that made different mistakes
maybe a few less
maybe a few more
but i wonder how many versions
ended up at your door
i wonder how many
had their own key
i wonder how many
witnessed you drop to one knee
i wonder how many
get to sleep next to you every night
i wonder how many
never needed to say goodbye
i wonder how many
stayed with you since our youth
and in truth
i just wonder if i'm the one version
that won't end up with you
so i look to another time
another place,
i wonder if we last forever -
or if i still get replaced

i run from you in dreams
i run from you in life
scared of what may come
from making the same mistake twice