i've been told that blue is a sad color

but blue reminds me of you

your eyes

the way they squint in the light of my camera

your hair

ruffled

like downy feathers

the midnight blue sky

as i sneak into your neighborhood

hands shaking

waiting for you

My arteries are clogged with my own *******.

If my heart ever fails, just know I did it to myself!

When did my bones get so brittle?

I swear I break my own neck every day getting out of bed.

My skin is just bad paper mache.

It breaks open at the mention of sadness.

My blood makes a puddle and runs down the drain

flowing out of my brain pretending when I'm feeling is

Pain.

underneath

the muddy

mellow surface

of the pond



a skull lies

jaw broken

shades of sage

tendrils

curled around



lime and

magenta

slender fish

dart around

empty eyes



what was

never a home

for a lonely

soul

makes an

abode

when i said i saw galaxies in your eyes

i was not lying!!

i saw the future and

it was safe

when i said my love reached to the skies

i could not lie!!

just have faith



when you asked again and again if it was all lies

i cannot lie to you

you are my sky and my moon and the entirety

of outer space

you are everything i've ever wanted and the

majority of what i've lost

and i would not lie

i guess

i always knew you weren't invincible

but when you looked at me with those

eyes (dark like night, glittering with adventure

and intelligence)

sometimes i forgot



and sometimes when i saw you

i'd wonder

if it was a front

but i never pressed too hard

because i'm not sure i wanted to find out



but like a crack in the wall

your defenses fall

and i see you all

and i am scared

no

terrified



once again (and again and again)

i miss the point

i look away

or never see in the first place

and i don't notice the suffering



i'm only let in

at the end

to see what i missed

and to see what i never could have changed

or would not have understood



and

i am sorry

sunshine!

he breaks down through the clouds

and god

is he radiant



his smile could literally topple buildings

i am defenseless

he is the sun and i

stare directly at him

to hell with my retinas!

all i want is him

slide your hands up the holes in my jeans

and fill them like you did my heart



honeycrisp kisses show me

what its like to be loved



hold me close

and make me feel safe



let your fingertips teach me

how to make you feel



as precious of a thing

that you treat me