My mind is darker than the deepest corners of the night,
Fragile,
Ready to shatter when a single beam of light slices through it.
I am not ready for that beam of light.
I am wandering blindly through the darkness,
No sense of direction,
Only the deep and quivering breaths from my chest
And the stinging tears that burn my face.

I have fought a battle
Between happiness and sadness
And it is clear that sadness prevails.
The blades are out
They slumber in the little white case in my top drawer.
I have tried and tried again to ignore its devious presence
But now I found myself falling for its painful intimacy once more.

My dark mind has been dormant for too long,
And I am left cold, naked and ashamed on the concrete floor of my innermost hatred.

I step out of my house
Look at the path
In front of me
It's *****
Mud, Insects, Dead Leaves
The path is already a mess
What about bigger things?
Like life?

Her eyes spell green.
She is a monster.
Behind my back
she breathes our her green fire
onto people so fragile
Consumes them with so much
Satisfaction
Sadism to a whole new level
Her strength grows
The weaker  
I strive to fight
Who are you?
Green monster

But it's not just her
Today I realised
It's all around me
I pull out my shield
To protect myself among the
Many green monsters
But one against many
Is a black piece against a hoard of white
Every white piece
Comes forward
Attacks
The little black piece
becomes weaker
and weaker
It's start to feel the monster's breath
Near its eyes
Down to the throat
Sooner or later
At its heart

So when this green monster
Finally
Breathes
The green fire within her
Along with many other monsters
I see myself
Drowning
In a green sea
where not even a single person
would care to take a look back at.