Too tired to stay awake.    Too scared to go to sleep.
I close my eyes
And the nightmares creep
They shadow over every wall
They jump and shout
They whisper and crawl
I try to keep from letting them win
These nightmares are only my thought deep within
So I listen to music to block it all out
but it won't fricken work they're just way too loud
And then the tears begin to fall down
As I stare at this screen because I daren't look around
I sit there a rock backwards and fourth
Backwards and fourth
I sit there and rock backward and fourth
Until I wake up in the morning's light
And this thing hasen't happened just one or twice
Why do you think that i'm up at this time?
Do you think I just deprive myself of sleep?
Do you think I'd lie about all these things?
Do you think that I'd make you read these words?
If all that it were was a way to be heard?
No.
Since the seventh of Feb 200 and now
I haven't slept without freaking out
can't properly sleep because I see his face
and when I do it scares me for days
I see him so cold lied there all alone
And no one can help him or bring him back home
There's just so much
That I will always regret
And there's so much more that I should have said
I wish I could change it go back and be there
Dad
I'm sorry
I should have been there
I should have seen the signs
I should kept you from losing your mind
I should have known
If I had known
I could have helped
I could have saved youur life
Saved you from all of that unfairness and strife
NO one should have to deal with that
especially someone as amazing as you
Dad

I miss you.
I don't know what to do.
Please tell me what to do?
Dad I don't have a clue.

They say I will move on with my life
But you're my hero
my king
my everything
I will always need you
I will always need you back
I just can't seem to chose the right path
To go down anymore
I need my daddy back
To help me live, to help my heart heal and soar.
So come back.
Please.
Come back.
Dad.



Withought you.
I can't
Sleep.