Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
Alice Burns Sep 2013
I knew I had something within me
But still I could never make it rain, most of the time
And when the thunder replied to my calls
I felt a thrill as its roar gave me confirmation and confidence
When instead I should have had no reaction
No doubt in expectations

Then, last night, as I lowered inhibitions and heightened awareness
My hands, correctly folded, received writings faint and soothing
Difficult to read the sensational inscriptions
I focused that usually avoided mind on the italics
Words, sometimes repeated, became clear and understood
Believe, and anything is possible
I guess knowing is nothing without belief

So now I walk the streets in my daily rituals
Giving attention and devotion to cries of any origin
But I believe now, more so than I did before
And as I exhale sighs of sympathy and comfort
Not only breath escapes my human lungs
But winds that carry those woes spoken in whispers
I LIKE POEMS MRX Aug 2015
I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$I HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH OTHER TROLLS\/\/\/>/..™™™™™™™™™ NO MORE TROLL KILLING FOR NO ONE. I WILL LIKE POEMS NOT KILLIE KILLIE ANY BODY\;;:::-#-$--$+=+;+(=(+=+$(@)@9+#-@(=--@-=-$-$-
'BEST­ REGARDS
X MAN 01160346661221298000000044166909

;$$&$&$&$&$&$&#&&#Entry---@-@-@-@-@-@-@-@ XMAN IS NOT MR L,GARY ,/\/\/>>/>///>/>/HE IS INNOCENT I WAS GOING BY THE NAME DRACULACRACKINGYETTY TWO YEARS AGO NOW IM DONE/>\>\>£>£>..£..¢.£..£.£.¢¢¥¢¥¢¥¢¥£¥¢¥LET THE TROLLS DIE OUT BY THEIR OWN SWORD//\/\/\/\/\/\/.\/.\//\/\//.\/\
MRXMAN
Ha!

Human (rat) race doomed!

Foregone conclusion hashtagged,
linkedin, predicated, et cetera, cuz
overactive derrière of yours truly
(no names mentioned, nor fickle
finger of fate pointed), and writer
of these words and one among many
riders (he adores) on the storm –
referring to brewing, looming, and
quaking potentially severe economic
fallout shattering The "debt ceiling"
or "debt limit"recommends ye dear
unknown (anonymous) readers bid
thee toodle loo  to civilization
and its discontents.

So much for hyperbole!
    
How axiomatic, ironic, quixotic, zoologic
that thee unavoidable ****** urge occurred
while in the midst of writing about that
vitally important ****** function, which
for any other Tom, **** or Harry would
be safer endeavor at least within their home.

That margin of err rear harmlessly doth
NOT exist within the rented domicile
of this twenty six plus years a married
(lighthearted) middle aged man.

What requisite non-forceful,
essential, dutiful call visiting
the ***** to purge the body electric
of supposed waste matter
(quite efficient machine ****
Sapiens anatomy), regarding
said expelling solid, loose, liquid...
thru **** ought to rank as
minimally risky private business.

Imagine matter of fact saunter
to the loo fraught with Uriah heaps
of danger that could imperil
the very existence of (in this case)
myself, and the rest of humanity.

Upon attempting to amble
very short distance, (perhaps
half a dozen paces), an
immediately deleterious,
hellaciously luminous, and
perilously serious threat
(unsurpassed even by hooliganism  
signature destruction forever
enshrining Gothic or Vandals –
if such peoples lived today and
occupied this apartment unit),
loomed as a far more impossibly
harrowing mission any combination
of maximum strength (Excedrin
would be superfluous) supposed
major natural disasters all rolled
into one frightful maelstrom.

Oft times the powerful need
to relief thyself disallows any
preparation H(abiliments), thus I
am forced to make a quick dash
to the toilet, BUT between
the cozy comfort of this easy
chair and the durable material
designed to suction even the
baddest, biggest, boldest BM
belies a trail and mountain
far more of wicked bewitched
crossing then say the now defunct
Fukushima Nuclear Power Plant.

Though this comparison may seem
like an exaggeration, the higgledy
piggledy hewn heap of fetid foul
fermenting faecal matter poses
dangerous, death defying diabolical
(DO NOT ENTER) dump.

No other option existed for me
to eradicate, expel, exorcise, et
cetera potential ***** matter except
to strike out toward barrier reef
of noxious, odoriferous, pestilential,
queasily revolting sky high (declared
SuperFund Site) to  enjoy simple
pleasure, whereby Gluteus Maximus
dispenses with human toxins.

The urge to let loose a stool sample
overrides any time to pen loving
note to surviving family members,
which (two darling grown daughters
seem like foreigners (or survivors
on a desert island) as each precious
Punim pursues autonomy countless
miles, whereby the eldest then
a Junior at The University of Pennsylvania,
and the youngest offspring plane
and simple sailed about seven
years ago to become
seasoned student abroad.

Though a tenant at this subsidized
(and quite agreeable accommodations
nestled within Perkiomen Valley,
Pennsylvania), no exaggeration necessary
to describe daily cataclysm perchance
spelling doom and downfall of this
dry husband and loving father to deux
progeny, who would hate to leave said
special offspring behind under
the sheltering sky.

Thus every onset to traipse
so few feet to flush out
thine flotsam and jetsam,
(when stream of ***** sprays
like a hose) to pay obeisance
and homage to modern
plumbing, the flash of mine
lxiv years zips thru me
memory, particularly when
carefully, gingerly
lumbering ridiculously slow
(lest mishap finds ambulance
siren wailing destiny of this chap
(most likely pronounced
dead on arrival), whereby tell tale
sigh of turgid tummy
would automatically inform doctors
that obstruction preventing quintessential
rear supply tubby
undisputed venal wickedness.

Tis at  unstoppable twitches
to defecate, (which sharp
saber rattling ****** spasms)
denote common urgent irrepressible
need arising within bowels),
when mental gallows humorous arises.

Such an embarrassing ending
(post eerie er) demise re: conclusion
to my rather ordinary life – (visa vis
being constipated, deprived
or hindered freeing offal,
would put to shame “windbag”
i.e. google as  proof positive
of blocked means to eliminate waste).

Also in tandem (though very
slightly tangential to above
distressful horrible likely presentiment,
this xMan bemoans being
swept off my yam bic pent
tam meter feet (literally)
by gigantic hands of she
(thee divine Gaia, who now
scatters defecated detritus
damning ability to access
commode constitutes reflection
on remaining Norwegian
Bachelor farmer from Lake Woebegone.

How trajectory of one measly
mortal primate webbed
whirled wide eyed schleps
along boulevard of broken dreams
(he may as well live planets,
galaxies or universes apart
worlds) ever shared
an intersecting vector
with another continues
to confound this crossword puzzler.

Again that sneaky sobriquet
irony doth mettle with
steely goatherd drivers
goes Pasteur ****, where gin
till lit tee lives.

Long story short described below.

Circumstance found this then
quite content solitary
son of the soil invited
to admirable, estimable, inimitable
estate listed as “Glen Elm”
within  National Registry of
owned properties within
Collegeville, Pennsylvania.

Garrison Keillor slated guest of honor.

He possessed je nais se quois
ability to tell tall tales,
whereby audience members
became rapt with seduction,
usurpation, and wide eyed yearning
to lean in so as to hear the suspense,
which increased in magnitude
in direct proportion as
his home spun voice became softer.

Unbeknownst to this
poor country bumpkin, when
he took bathroom break
during impromptu intermission,
a gal in her mid thirties
livingsocial with her parents
within the Mainline
(very wealthy enclave of residents
within southwestern Montgomery
County, Pennsylvania)
agreed to follow Jewish tradition,
asper prearranged marriages.

Though neither of  Semitic peoples,
nor the least bit familiar
with one of the oldest Religions,
thee family, whose youngest daughter
hinted of spinsterhood, their
open minded kindred ideas
generated exception to  
dictum remaining steadfast
to pinpoint “a nice Jewish
Kosher Boy”!

As frequent attendees
at this Leiper Mansion and
storied magnet for literati,
the accidental chance encounter
found thyself and unfamiliar gal
(fate decreed as thy bartered bride)
happened to be awaiting use of water closet.

As tends to be the predilection
of so called fairer gender ***,
this petite and attractive dame
introduced herself, which subsequently
found us becoming more
curious about the other.

The natural order of two
heterosexual individuals
(one male, the other female)
allowed basic instinct of
attraction to engender
fledgling friendship, that quickly
leapfrogged into
a sexually intimate dalliance.

Without any precautions
qua birth control inevitable
outcome of hitting
the figurative bullseye linkedin while
listening to the rhythm method occurred.

This reality determined
tepid reception courtesy
future parents in law to marry gal,
whose youngest daughter's
future child I fathered.

Even from this fairly commonplace
getgo dynamics wildly described
along seismograph of 10.00 earthquake,
one category 5 hurricane,
and an F5 tornado thrown in
for good measure for measure,
these tidbits totally hyperbolic,
thus equal much ado about nothing relative
to the interpersonal juxtaposition
of our quite rapid tête-à-tête,
that continues (to much lesser degree –
analogous to subsiding
storm of the Century 21) to this day.

After surviving approximately
two and a half dozen plus years,
(the marital inflictions
unquestionably more harrowing,
strangulating, and threatening
life and limb) battle scars
(many broken bones begot
by innocuous shuffling to
bathroom) populating neary
every square inch of this
ordinary chap deserves a medal of honor.
a revision of the earlier posted poem with a similar but not exact same titled:

     ("Thus always I cause the death of tyrants.”)
the purported line Brutus uttered
after assassinating Julius Caesar.

     Alternatively titled:
The prose and consequential arguments
for the death penalty.

     An attempt to resuscitate
the following rambling missive
written quite some years ago
(being declared dead on arrival
if yours truly took emergency measures
to recruit editorial assistance),
but after re-reading loopy thought process,
I decided to submit to rebukes
and suffer withering criticism
from any anonymous reader.  

     Ever since the early forerunners
of twenty first century mankind
(sprinted across the trackless expanse
extant upon planet Earth),
modern **** Sapiens
essentially won out as coterie precursors
sans predominant present day team of rivals.

     The zigzag line,
whence our arboreal ancestors
skedaddled their way
toward a capitalone delineation
of die hard grateful deadheads
******* disaster, and acquiring
dubious distinction decreeing domain
of oblate spheroid as prime real estate,
(when Prometheus fire
made privy to proto humans,
while an anonymous forerunner
of Flintstones squatted squeezing
with utmost effort,
when nothing more
than an ear deafening blast of flatulence
issued forth unwittingly
kindled sparks of tinder),
the imperceptible figurative ink
did not dry before these hairy hooligans
edged out other prehensile primates.

     Enfant Terrible employed
as an analogy for punctuated equilibrium
(postulated by Stephen Jay Gould
heterochrony and similar evolutionary changes
would not be directed by the genes
that actually build various body parts)
witnessing a boom rang
amidst feral creatures unpredictably crowing
with foo fighting fecundity
(inadvertently in sync with Feng Shui)
to launch a scrappy posse
of measly mensch kin’s into the realm.

     This phenomena countless thousands
(more like millions) of years
since the inception of brutal,
nasty and short tempered
present day troglodytes.

     With the aid of an imaginary crystal ball,
the seeds of White Lily got borne
via Aery windy gusts
jet setting most “advanced” pygmy beastie boys
as the animalistic bellwether
per future adventure,
whence many anthropological
opposable thumbed volumes yet written
till the present deadly crossroads
announced ruthless Reichstag.

     Credos, codas, diktats
governing infantile Messerschmitt
Sol Invictus yet unnamed role
as most dangerous living beings
known to exist
unwittingly usurped
grandiose nom de plume
as Master baiters
predicating their survival
on brawn and brains
to public enemy number one
to all other life forms.

     As the fittest
(at least when accidents of circumstances
found tendency to crowd source,
the mob mentality already evident
as hyena cackles quickly garnered rubric
of might equals right),
thus grabbing by force of strong arms
(fingers clutching deadly lances),
the top prize
as sovereign dictators of the Proletariat).

     Over the course of millennia
(presently without Melania, who cares),
they became the de facto dominant species.

     The proto humans ancestors of Donald Trump,
essentially won the race millenniums ago.

     The evolutionary descendents
metamophasizing into bipedal hominids
of recent mankind did not monkey around
when competing in the Human Race.

     They elbowed, jostled,
and ousted competitors eventually
to ascend inexorably their way
to the top tier of totalitarianism.

     Great indomitable naked apes
of early simian evolution,
would not settle for any role
except top banana
in the hierarchical schema of biota
extant throughout the nascent
dawn of civilization
and age of Aquarius.

     Violence with whatever materiel at hand
vanquished any threat
to world wide webbed *******
sans existence at dawn of civilization.
  
    Closer to late morning and high noon
the tall tale ushered vanity
videre licet venal, vicious, vocal
frankly zapped Tarzans,
10,000 Maniacs, and voodoo worshippers
blitzed like banshees.

     Literal face saving each manikin for himself
(gnome hatter whether blood pact swore),
the bludgeoned, hoodwinked,
and whipped warriors wary warlocks
fought tooth nail to the death.

     One instant found a bald
(ah that explains my receding heir line)
bandied legged *******
macho tree swinging sportsman
(my monkey's uncle)
brazenly boasting bona fide.

     Well guess what ma friend?

     That sure-footed geico hunter
met a ****** death on an empty stomach.

     His purported blood brothers abandoned him
(at the drop of a clump of offal)
as not dependent and unreliable brethren.

     No such thing as a gentlemen’s agreement
ruled the ****** terra firmae.

     Amidst the warren of primates,
a promise quickly broached instantaneously
after pledging allegiance to a pseudo fraternity.

     Swift lee tailored and harried styled obeisance
adhered to a flip flop (dip thong)
pattern that guaranteed staying alive.

     This included bopping strapping "jocks"
on their beanies
with rotten tangerines of bystander’s
whereat even babies innocently
caught in the culture club
thwacks between one competing claque and another.

     Pity clobbered indiscriminately
friend and de foe alike
exacerbating ruination of bucolic beauty.

     Contra bands (very loosely applied)
associated with village people
as the most powerful brigands,
which shifting fidelity took place
without the presence
of border crossing guards
or border collies.

     The open frontier
presented Avast earthlinked heaven,
where danger lurked
in most every field camouflaged
by delusively diminutive sized cretins,
that punched a wallop with a crack
on the noggin before
indigenous faux peoples swooped down
amidst the war whoop emitted
by a madding crowd marauding
where angels feared to tread.

     Oft times (no doubt),
thee ah bridged brotherly bond broke
brooked ranks (once
upon unfamiliar terrain
of an alien nation)
plying figurative cards
to benefit bristling brood.
    
     Deoxyribonucleic Acid
played a key role as genetics
probably parlayed traits
to the ace of spades,
where the wild impractical joker
abetted physical heft
to hoist with her/his own petard heavy objects,
and mandates employed and obeyed
by snatching strapping twisted sisters,
thence sacking sacred cistern,
when bands of ruffians
within the melee wrought regal restitution.

     Where nature fell short
weeding out the weak, sickly, elderly,
frail, deformed, et cetera,
the Flint Stone Age paradigm
evinced population control
linkedin to Netzero tolerance
for even minor infractions.

     Interwoven with the whack
upon the mole hole atop noggin
with cracked skull
(and broken weapon of destruction)
throve the depredations
of rival rebellious ravenous stealthy,
quick of pluck (prestidigitatious like)
orchestrated nature made ideology.

   Highlight of Goofus and Gallant
bred within the survival instinct
of hungry hordes of prey,
when Earth in the balance
against an uncomfortable truth
smug smurf like scavengers.

     Punishment meted out
and limited by the poison
yielded courtesy iron maiden
of hand-to-hand mortal kombat.

     Only when the codification,
edification, glorification…
of sedentary versus nomadic lifestyle
did considerations turn
to protection of self and others.

     This shift in consciousness
occurred over great swaths of time.

     At some juncture in the history,
an alteration from superstitious,
querulous, and portentous outlook,
some anonymous hotmail
awakened with a momentous,
judicious, and industrious insight
to counter act and oppose
hellacious and supplant said pathos
with a healthy generous dose
of fortuitousness reckoned
by invention formulating calculus,
audaciousness and picking up
some helpful tips from bad company.

     Difficult to pinpoint
the precise instance or prodigy
who advanced contemplation,
federation, intuition…
the process most likely happened
in fits and starts.
    
     As aggregates of close affiliates
with out genus and species
recognized benefits of law and order,
a coordinated effort
seemed to blossom forth
promulgating civility,
every good boy does fine mentality
and seeking methodologies
to offer greater guarantee for longevity.
  
     Creedence clearwater revival
delivered the gospel according to Matthew,
which soon indoctrinated
the merry brigands of pagans
actuating obloquy against contrary beliefs.

     Long story short of course
forcibly pronounced decree
imposing religious strictures
to be obeyed lest one be sentenced to death.

     Many a decent creature,
who found solace from spirits
that inhabited the natural environment
got sucker punched
(or worse tortured till he and/or
she recanted supposed primitive beliefs),
and at some instance
relinquished spiritual heritage
harkening back generations.
  
     Though freedom of religion
an inalienable right, a twisted sister logic
(my opinion) seems
to destroy innocent lives
while a terroristic perpetrator
becomes a martyr.

     If the realm of each cerebral individual
aggressively usurped
by indomitable fanatics
hell bent on proselytizing
at a very tender age,
(when the mind most malleable),
and hashtagging those
whose willpower greater than any sword,
the latter labeled heretics
with the price of their life
to pay for staunchly held vision quest.

     Here doth stare me a long entrenched
hypocrisy at the expense
of no threat to another.  
      
     How (warning cause mumbo jumbo ahead)
in the name of tarnation
(with or without feathers
would be incidental
to this Unitarian based atheist)
can there be a more severe implication
of self sovereignty than the deprivation
for personal willfulness
as a natural curiosity
to cogitate, educate, genuflect…
et cetera on the ramifications
of humanism if forced
to recant such individualistic projections?

     Unbeknownst to this wordsmith
his meandering reflections would follow
an arc unpredictable
at the start of this self-imposed literary exercise.

     His er rather my intent aspired
to dwell on near black and white principles
of so-called right and wrong.

     Funny (and/or maybe ironic),
that most if not all organized edicts
disparage against every single premise
(particularly taking the life of another
without just cause), yet pronounce
severe screeds with a bounty hunter
put upon the head of he/she
who professes such antithetical intimations.

     Further objection toward adherents
to this, that or some other accepted codex,
when the sanctity of embryonic/fetal entity
sets mad men going off
on a rampage of ranting, and raving,
and even killing in the name of pro life.

     This introspective, live,
oddly ruminating uber xman wags
as a sagacious thinker,
and does assent that a capital offense
(such as ****** – minus self defense)
ought to be dealt with a blow
(both figurative and literal)
against the killer, though outright execution
disallows the hardened criminal
to become sensitized
to such a deadly deed.

     Earlier chapters of mein kampf
would elicit an immediate declaration
that what he/she who kills another
ought to get (I scream) their just desserts.

     As the decades passed, a realization
that exact retribution can bring reduction
regarding the departed heartfelt,
lost past quirky specialness,
whether that person
constitutes an outlier
whose notions, thoughts,
whims, et cetera, could upend
the entire complex edifice
what tomb me on par
with an ennobled, established,
and accepted myth greater than Sisyphus.

     Whatsapp penning to me
(a punning logophile
with acute perception
can be briefly explained
by the role of fatherhood.

     As the papa of two
dearly beloved daughters
(both soon on the cusp of taking wing
and flying the coop
at the electronic date/time stamp),
many controversial stances
underwent augmentation
within the breastworks of mine *****.

     How many emotionally
laden issues posit one or both
of said prized progeny
as a hypothetical/speculative victim
courtesy growing up
in a dysfunctional upbringing.

     Anger against the avenger
would be mirrored by innumerable questions.

     I would be keen to share
how pained this papa felt/feels,
and beckon to  explain
what provoked such unforgivable
vengeful wrath against himself.

     Damage would haunt
thine prized precious offspring,
and this dada cannot imagine
how a mother and father endure
the never-ending permanent harm
dealt their son or daughter
no matter the perpetrator penalized.
("Thus always I cause the death of tyrants.”)
the purported line Brutus uttered
after assassinating Julius Caesar.

     Alternatively titled:
The prose and consequential arguments
for the death penalty.

     An attempt to resuscitate
the following rambling missive
written quite some years ago
(being declared dead on arrival
if yours truly took emergency measures
to recruit editorial assistance),
but after re-reading loopy thought process,
I decided to submit to rebukes
and suffer withering criticism
from any anonymous reader.  

     Ever since the early forerunners
of twenty first century mankind
(sprinted across the trackless expanse
extant upon planet Earth),
modern **** Sapiens
essentially won out as coterie precursors
sans predominant present day team of rivals.

     The zigzag line,
whence our arboreal ancestors
skedaddled their way
toward a capitalone delineation
of die hard grateful deadheads
******* disaster, and acquiring
dubious distinction decreeing domain
of oblate spheroid as prime real estate,
(when Prometheus fire
made privy to proto humans,
while an anonymous forerunner
of Flintstones squatted squeezing
with utmost effort,
when nothing more
than an ear deafening blast of flatulence
issued forth unwittingly
kindled sparks of tinder),
the imperceptible figurative ink
did not dry before these hairy hooligans
edged out other prehensile primates.

     Enfant Terrible employed
as an analogy for punctuated equilibrium
(postulated by Stephen Jay Gould
heterochrony and similar evolutionary changes
would not be directed by the genes
that actually build various body parts)
witnessing a boom rang
amidst feral creatures unpredictably crowing
with foo fighting fecundity
(inadvertently in sync with Feng Shui)
to launch a scrappy posse
of measly mensch kin’s into the realm.

     This phenomena countless thousands
(more like millions) of years
since the inception of brutal,
nasty and short tempered
present day troglodytes.

     With the aid of an imaginary crystal ball,
the seeds of White Lily got borne
via Aery windy gusts
jet setting most “advanced” pygmy beastie boys
as the animalistic bellwether
per future adventure,
whence many anthropological
opposable thumbed volumes yet written
till the present deadly crossroads
announced ruthless Reichstag.

     Credos, codas, diktats
governing infantile Messerschmitt
Sol Invictus yet unnamed role
as most dangerous living beings
known to exist
unwittingly usurped
grandiose nom de plume
as Master baiters
predicating their survival
on brawn and brains
to public enemy number one
to all other life forms.

     As the fittest
(at least when accidents of circumstances
found tendency to crowd source,
the mob mentality already evident
as hyena cackles quickly garnered rubric
of might equals right),
thus grabbing by force of strong arms
(fingers clutching deadly lances),
the top prize
as sovereign dictators of the Proletariat).

     Over the course of millennia
(presently without Melania, who cares),
they became the de facto dominant species.

     The proto humans ancestors of Donald Trump,
essentially won the race millenniums ago.

     The evolutionary descendents
metamophasizing into bipedal hominids
of recent mankind did not monkey around
when competing in the Human Race.

     They elbowed, jostled,
and ousted competitors eventually
to ascend inexorably their way
to the top tier of totalitarianism.

     Great indomitable naked apes
of early simian evolution,
would not settle for any role
except top banana
in the hierarchical schema of biota
extant throughout the nascent
dawn of civilization
and age of Aquarius.

     Violence with whatever materiel at hand
vanquished any threat
to world wide webbed *******
sans existence at dawn of civilization.
  
    Closer to late morning and high noon
the tall tale ushered vanity
videre licet venal, vicious, vocal
frankly zapped Tarzans,
10,000 Maniacs, and voodoo worshippers
blitzed like banshees.

     Literal face saving each manikin for himself
(gnome hatter whether blood pact swore),
the bludgeoned, hoodwinked,
and whipped warriors wary warlocks
fought tooth nail to the death.

     One instant found a bald
(ah that explains my receding heir line)
bandied legged *******
macho tree swinging sportsman
(my monkey's uncle)
brazenly boasting bona fide.

     Well guess what ma friend?

     That sure-footed geico hunter
met a ****** death on an empty stomach.

     His purported blood brothers abandoned him
(at the drop of a clump of offal)
as not dependent and unreliable brethren.

     No such thing as a gentlemen’s agreement
ruled the ****** terra firmae.

     Amidst the warren of primates,
a promise quickly broached instantaneously
after pledging allegiance to a pseudo fraternity.

     Swift lee tailored and harried styled obeisance
adhered to a flip flop (dip thong)
pattern that guaranteed staying alive.

     This included bopping strapping "jocks"
on their beanies
with rotten tangerines of bystander’s
whereat even babies innocently
caught in the culture club
thwacks between one competing claque and another.

     Pity clobbered indiscriminately
friend and de foe alike
exacerbating ruination of bucolic beauty.

     Contra bands (very loosely applied)
associated with village people
as the most powerful brigands,
which shifting fidelity took place
without the presence
of border crossing guards
or border collies.

     The open frontier
presented Avast earthlinked heaven,
where danger lurked
in most every field camouflaged
by delusively diminutive sized cretins,
that punched a wallop with a crack
on the noggin before
indigenous faux peoples swooped down
amidst the war whoop emitted
by a madding crowd marauding
where angels feared to tread.

     Oft times (no doubt),
thee ah bridged brotherly bond broke
brooked ranks (once
upon unfamiliar terrain
of an alien nation)
plying figurative cards
to benefit bristling brood.
    
     Deoxyribonucleic Acid
played a key role as genetics
probably parlayed traits
to the ace of spades,
where the wild impractical joker
abetted physical heft
to hoist with her/his own petard heavy objects,
and mandates employed and obeyed
by snatching strapping twisted sisters,
thence sacking sacred cistern,
when bands of ruffians
within the melee wrought regal restitution.

     Where nature fell short
weeding out the weak, sickly, elderly,
frail, deformed, et cetera,
the Flint Stone Age paradigm
evinced population control
linkedin to Netzero tolerance
for even minor infractions.

     Interwoven with the whack
upon the mole hole atop noggin
with cracked skull
(and broken weapon of destruction)
throve the depredations
of rival rebellious ravenous stealthy,
quick of pluck (prestidigitatious like)
orchestrated nature made ideology.

   Highlight of Goofus and Gallant
bred within the survival instinct
of hungry hordes of prey,
when Earth in the balance
against an uncomfortable truth
smug smurf like scavengers.

     Punishment meted out
and limited by the poison
yielded courtesy iron maiden
of hand-to-hand mortal kombat.

     Only when the codification,
edification, glorification…
of sedentary versus nomadic lifestyle
did considerations turn
to protection of self and others.

     This shift in consciousness
occurred over great swaths of time.

     At some juncture in the history,
an alteration from superstitious,
querulous, and portentous outlook,
some anonymous hotmail
awakened with a momentous,
judicious, and industrious insight
to counter act and oppose
hellacious and supplant said pathos
with a healthy generous dose
of fortuitousness reckoned
by invention formulating calculus,
audaciousness and picking up
some helpful tips from bad company.

     Difficult to pinpoint
the precise instance or prodigy
who advanced contemplation,
federation, intuition…
the process most likely happened
in fits and starts.
    
     As aggregates of close affiliates with out genus and species recognized benefits of law and order, a coordinated effort seemed to blossom forth promulgating civility, every good boy does fine mentality and seeking methodologies to offer greater guarantee for longevity.
  
     Creedence clearwater revival delivered the gospel according to Matthew, which soon indoctrinated the merry brigands of pagans actuating obloquy against contrary beliefs.

     Long story short of course forcibly pronounced decree imposing religious strictures to be obeyed lest one be sentenced to death.

     Many a decent creature, who found solace from spirits that inhabited the natural environment got sucker punched (or worse tortured till he and/or she recanted supposed primitive beliefs), and at some instance relinquished spiritual heritage harkening back generations.
  
     Though freedom of religion an inalienable right, a twisted sister logic (my opinion) seems to destroy innocent lives while a terroristic perpetrator becomes a martyr.

     If the realm of each cerebral individual aggressively usurped by indomitable fanatics hell bent on proselytizing at a very tender age, (when the mind most malleable), and hashtagging those whose willpower greater than any sword, the latter labeled heretics with the price of their life to pay for staunchly held vision quest.

     Here doth stare me a long entrenched hypocrisy at the expense of no threat to another.  
      
     How (warning cause mumbo jumbo ahead) in the name of tarnation (with or without feathers would be incidental to this Unitarian based atheist) can there be a more severe implication of self sovereignty than the deprivation for personal willfulness as a natural curiosity to cogitate, educate, genuflect…et cetera on the ramifications of humanism if forced to recant such individualistic projections?

     Unbeknownst to this wordsmith his meandering reflections would follow an arc unpredictable at the start of this self-imposed literary exercise. His er rather my intent aspired to dwell on near black and white principles of so-called right and wrong.

     Funny (and/or maybe ironic), that most if not all organized edicts disparage against every single premise (particularly taking the life of another without just cause), yet pronounce severe screeds with a bounty hunter put upon the head of he/she who professes such antithetical intimations.

     Further objection toward adherents to this, that or some other accepted codex, when the sanctity of embryonic/fetal entity sets mad men going off on a rampage of ranting, and raving, and even killing in the name of pro life.

     This introspective, live, oddly ruminating uber xman wags as a sagacious thinker, and does assent that a capital offense (such as ****** – minus self defense) ought to be dealt with a blow (both figurative and literal) against the killer, though outright execution disallows the hardened criminal to become sensitized to such a deadly deed.

     Earlier chapters of mein kampf would elicit an immediate declaration that what he/she who kills another ought to get (I scream) their just desserts. As the decades passed, a realization that exact retribution can bring reduction regarding the departed heartfelt, lost past quirky specialness, whether that person constitutes an outlier whose notions, thoughts, whims, et cetera, could upend the entire complex edifice what tomb me on par with an ennobled, established, and accepted myth greater than Sisyphus.

     Whatsapp penning to me (a punning logophile with acute perception can be briefly explained by the role of fatherhood. As the papa of two dearly beloved daughters (both soon on the cusp of taking wing and flying the coop at the electronic date/time stamp), many controversial stances underwent augmentation within the breastworks of mine *****.

     How many emotionally laden issues posit one or both of said prized progeny as a hypothetical/speculative victim courtesy growing up in a dysfunctional upbringing.

     Anger against the avenger would be mirrored by innumerable questions. I would be keen to share how pained this papa felt/feels, and beckon to  explain what provoked such unforgivable vengeful wrath against himself.

     Damage would haunt thine prized precious offspring, and this dada cannot imagine how a mother and father endure the never-ending permanent harm dealt their son or daughter no matter the perpetrator penalized.

— The End —