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Armani Dec 2017
I'm a hellspawn suffering, in a world of angels
Perfection and happiness, so never attainable
alienated from the ones I love,
turbulent but forever low.
Dying slowly and bathed in anguish,
emotions I'll never show.

Ballad of the Baphomet's first born, my seventeenth and final poem
soul is forever split down the middle but I always lean to evil, I don't know how or why.
guess that's what happens when you expose a tortured soul.
thought I'd find warmth in love, but you know how that goes

cuz tenacity and optimism, were seeds that were never sewn
I sound pessimistic but happy feelings I've outgrown
in my soul I feel a torrential void of darkness and repressed unshowns
and fire where the demons lurk,
it's no surprise I'm alone.  

cuz no one's a ******* artist, I'm a minority in my household
and in my country too.

always defeated, always retreating
no-one to run too, I have to face my demons
but I lost that fight, my entrails hang from the ceiling
gave them passage to my heart, through the ****** sequins
I smoke cuz I'm afraid of the thoughts i think when i don't sleep enough
like how I'm worthless and undervalued,
the true thoughts I optimistically decline.

I know you love me but I don't love myself
and that's the ******* problem, I got ******* problems
and no way to solve them
except a brain and solemns,
but they don't solve my problems.
Cuz it's in the silence,
that I hear the violence,
between my eyelids,
and that's why I don't sleep I cry.

i have four dimensions, soul, mind, body and spirit
but i'm down to three, cuz i sold my body to spirits
lost my mind, and now my spirit's gone too
nothing but a shell and his soul, is this what it's come to?

goodbye world, I'll miss you dearly
but I'm not right for you, you've shown that clearly
I can't even die in peace, cuz the silence speaks
it has my voice, it says
"Cry to me, I gave you darkness and I can take it back.
Give me your last dimension, and I can save you.
Your soul's already broken, might as well let me fix it
I'll give you the debts the world was owing you, and three sixes
and for future reference you can call me savior."
and I sat there, didn't have **** to say
but I did look him in his eyes
and I said *******; but ask me later.

— The End —