I got all the things I need I still want problems though
I don't want to go to funerals, friends not even getting old and going out early
am I really a real person anymore? Self-destructive
so selfish, I know there's pictures of me smiling still
and the cargo pants pink polo craze you went through,
streets shining gold and I'm still red like a kite though
just skateboarded and landed in a new job modeling glow
I'm glad my phases had to go and I can't describe my life when asked
by my mom about it, just bought some clothes
so I can look bomb at the club but I keep that on the low
I just want to be burdened instead of being one
Want to be insecure about things because my mind is broken
got to stop seeing things the way they are and embrace the fold
I'm sending xoxo's anyways, step dad too, I'm undoing myself
even if I don't even want to lose things I don't have

Be with me in ****** footprints / in your mom's silverware sets / in stucco walls

I want to sleep on dark leather couches with you.

Tell me more about cable:
I want you to introduce me to damp grass on football fields that we skateboarded to underneath the stars that I was with when i was away from you

Hello, earthling!
Let's do normal Earth things together (I could be a person for you)
I fixed the thermostat so that my bedroom can be habitable for human beans such as yourself

Drink six Diet Cokes with me so we can put six dead ladie bugs inside the bottles and BlowThemUpWithFire

"Yes, I know about fire! I've seen it all before OK! And I want to pretend I haven't so that i can ooooh and aawwwhhh when you show me !!!!"

I want to be a person for you.

Spray paint my bones gold when you're done crafting my skin into a turban so that I know it's real - I made this for you

When I first saw you, my heart skipped a beat.
It wasn't the fact that you wore my favorite shade of white,
or that you had hair that looked as soft as feathers
it was a certain look in your eyes
as you managed a shy little lopsided smile
that literally swept me off my feet
because when I was too absorbed by the sight of you
I hadn't realized that someone was yelling from behind
warning me to get out of the way
as he skateboarded through the sidewalk
I thanked my lucky stars because I saved myself just in time
only to have missed a step and fell anyway
in a pile of crisp red and brown leaves
It must've been one of the most embarrassing moments of my life
but it was fine because in an instant
you walked on by and offered a hand
I stared blankly at your right hand
and noticed how pale they were as I took it
and pushed myself up, blushing crimson red
knowing you've seen it all but you didn't say a word
You just smiled again and tucked the page
neatly in your pocket like an unfinished note.

Moving forward
"Onward & Upward"
I plan and I plot
Coffee spilling out of my lungs
As my heart aches with what once was
I know you must,
In your boy filled cocoon
Miss and long for me too.

"Its been so weird."
You said, I will never forget
Or stop replaying the look in your
Hazel eyes
The love won and lost.

We wanted so much
We planned so much
We hoped for so much
As my filthy hands longed to hold us together
We fell apart like shattered skeletons
But you assured me time will heal and mend.

I'm just so glad
My words, my thoughts, my art
Could speak to you for the final time
I imagine we will come face to face
Our hearts both pounding and echoing
Our friends surrounding us
While I dodge the blame of men around me
There was no world in which
You morphed into the man
I need and long for.

Showing up, airplane
You skateboarded past me
But truth be told,
I never intended for such depth
But I don't regret it
And I can't keep it
But I like ME, better
Without you.

The sky looks so sad today
As if still recooping from the loss of sunshine
I thought the world of you
But I never really saw you
Until you wronged me
But it was much too late.

"You didn't turn out to be who I thought you were."
What a painful and heart breaking phrase
But I copy and paste
Authenticity
Sleeping in another mans bed
Here and there
But I hesitate to give myself away
Because I know I can pleasure me

Mamas always got something to say
But your caliber was not quite
In line with mine
But I spit and frolic
My hands lifted into the sky
Free, the noose around my beak
I let it fly free in the wind.

Because right now
I'm all I need.

I met a bee who carried a leaf.
It held it tight in it's little feet.
It skateboarded down from the sky to me.