Me and Mary moved in together almost six months ago now. We moved into a little smelly carpeted paradise on the top floor of pre-war building in Dennistoun . It has three rooms, and that's all we needed: The glowing yellow walled bedroom, the freezing grey tiled bathroom ( that could wake a dead man up for work), and the warm red living room that has a sink and a cooker shoved in the corner of it.

In the beginning it was bliss: childish ****** adventure, and many a burnt stew. We would watch ***** catch up t.v on our laptops until well after midnight, falling asleep in each others arms on the couch, with easy dreams and full bellies; I don’t think we ever slept on our bed then, because then it had a better purpose. But that’s where she sleeps now, and I’m on the couch staring at the ceiling night after night, hoping she’ll call me in. But she hasn’t, and it’s been almost a week since she’s said anything to me. You see thirty days ago I lost my job with the leccy grid, and we’ve had to cut back on a few things as a precaution: First it was our Friday night bottle of wine, and then it was our nights out on the Saturday; then good portabella mushrooms, then it was the Netflix subscriptions and last week I had to cancel our B.T account. I’v tried to tell her it’s only temporary, that I’ll be back on my feet in no time, and all she has to do is trust and believe in me and what we have together. But she's tired from working every shift she can get, and the last thing she said to me was with wet eyes that refused to focus on me:  “ How can I love you without wifi?”.

To be fair to her, it was in the middle of a very heated conversation where we had both said some incredibly non-sensical attacks on one another, but it’s stuck with me. Is that all we are? A ****** little connection that you pay for monthly?

Alright Mr. Weegie,
Calm the ******* beans,
I know it's ******* windy,
Just put on some jeans.

I can see it on your shoulder,
That masssive ******* chip,
That makes you think you're sorer,
Than a broken ******* hip.

That make you think you know,
About every ******* thing.
"What's that you say? Oh no no no,
I'M THE BANTER KING."

Your life's the ******* hardest,
And your car's the ******* best.
Your ****** dump is bigger
And better than the rest.

OH silly ******* weegie,
Just step off your box,
They're all the same everywhere,
Great ones, bores and *****.

This world is not against you,
Your city's not the best,
It's great I won't refuse you,
Just equal to the rest.

For it's man and mind that makes a life,
Not buildings, blood and steel.
And the mind contains the greatest strife,
So shut up and eat your meal.