The Challenge
(Day 18)
What is it you stand to gain?
Playing with hearts like cards, is this a game?
This isn’t poker, this isn’t snooker, why you playing with these  hearts as if you’re playing soccer?
This pain my heart can no longer nest
Can’t believe I was a pawn in this game of chess
How did I get caught up in this mess
Believing you were pure good nothing else
Alas you are evil with the “d” I would belittle your cruelty if I called you anything less

Who takes a breastfeeding child from its mother only to dump it in a slum with no one to cater to?

Who cuts open a stitched laceration only to watch it rot so a limb gets amputated.

When did love become so merciless and unkind?

When has God ever played games with His likeness, their minds?

Why say I do before a crowd of witnesses only to act like you don’t behind closed doors?

Why promise forever when life with you makes a visit from death better?

Why pretend you’re gentle a dove,  when you’re a vulture, all claws?

Why wear a robe of integrity when the skin underneath is only known for breaking the law?

What’s the prize?
Why do all these hearts have to pay the price?

Are you ever going to end this cycle
Is this going to be an endless vicious circle?


r3d

#yararewa  
#northernstar  
#roadtorecovery #everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple #welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d

I've failed you once again

I really am that wild one that can't be tamed
It's not you this time, I'm to blame

The picture of my dreams are too humongous to fit  your frame

Your excuses have long  become lame
I've found a shelter, a hedge from your cruel reign

There will be a draught from your abuses that never cease to rain
Your insanity got me wondering if I ever was sane
You and I cease to be, nothing will ever be the same
This time I choose me, I have trained hard enough to beat you at  your drain-game

I am the grand prize, I, will I claim

Never again with your toxic love will I remain

I'd aim to  fail you again
This time with showers of love I'd pour on myself to burn out your toxic flames

I"d fail you once and for all, rather than fail  myself
Never again!

What's there to lose when all i stand to do is gain?

I've picked me off of your shelf

This time I'm doing me, stop looking for flaws in everyone else

Find you again, do it for yourself
r3d

#yararewa
#northernstar
#roadtorecovery #everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple #welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d

The Challenge
(Day 17)

The villain was once a victim
The abuser once was the abused
The bully once was bullied
The  hunter was once a prey

These are the ones who neither possessed the will power nor the required support to fight the negative effects of their experiences

These are the ones whose voices were drowned by the screams of stigma

These are the souls left to sail away in the rivers of anger and hate.

Who is to blame?
Society?
Environment?
Religion?
Tradition?
Ignorance?
How do we break this cycle?
How do we end this vicious circle?
The villian, the victim must all be helped.

No one should be left out, all deserve to be helped.

r3d
#yararewa  
#northernstar  
#roadtorecovery #everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple #welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d

The Challenge (Day 21)

Words!
The reason I ended up in this ward.

Words!
The reason I threw away my self worth.

Words!
In whom I hope to find the strength to break free

Words!
The reason I must flee

Words!
In the beginning was the Word

When I was created I was made of God,
I was with God.

A ward of God until I lost my way
With my reckless abandon and the things I failed to do or say

I made a cocktail of truth laced with lies to top the mix
Believing my deceit was made up with just enough wit
With which I could make a deft bargain

With the devil, He said riches and wealth were mine to gain

I took the bargain.
Thinking I was smart enough to beat him at his game
Swift enough to cross the finish line without her burning gaze realizing I had switched lanes

I was rewarded with shame
The excruciating pain
Oh how this became the death of me!

Words!
Rit!
My word!
Not the writ of law
This Rit must be an exception to the writ of law

Words!
STOP! The word that might've saved me from this castle walls.
The ward I war to break free from
Oh! If only I had listened
Listen! Whenever I was asked to be Silent..
These anagrams!
Silent a cause, Listen the effect
I never knew cause the only thing my eyes fed off were the sights my eyes heard on Instagram.

I had taken enough hits
I was deemed unfit
But the comments all read "lit"
No one calls me dope anymore in this ward
You dare not say that Word in here, lest you end up in ropes

280 characters are one to many to say "I quit"

Words sentenced me to this ward
Words showed me no mercy
Words made me
By words, my death I'd meet

r3d

roadtorecovery #everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple #welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d

The Challenge
(Day 19)
“RITJIMWA:
Something good/beautiful, joy has come to them!“
Something eccentric, something whose drama might be considered Oscar worthy, something unbelievably beautiful, something awesome, something amazing... for everyone reading this, you've got to be atleast one of this to someone, you've got to mean more than all these words to a couple of people.to say the least.
So next time someone tries to be condescending or silly, look them square in the face, and then smile and walk away with your head high knowing you're beautiful!
And you owe no one an explanation cause your smile has done enough already.
Remember, sometimes you'd forget but try to remember as often as you can that no one else in the world can offer the uniqueness you've got!

#yararewa  
#northernstar  
#roadtorecovery #everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple #welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d

The Challenge
(Day 12)

When you pour the liquid content of a 35cl soda into a 50cl bottle it will never fill it up
If you pour it into a 15cl bottle it will fill it up and overflow.
Same thing with when you pour your love, energies, vibes or share your space, sanctuary and essence with the wrong people.
You’d either end up being too much or never enough.
If this is the case with you please find a way to detach yourself from this person before the damage becomes irreparable.
No matter how much you give someone who doesn’t value you or holds you in contempt it will never be enough.
Save yourself before you start to second guess your worth and shatter your esteem.
The only way to help a toxic person is not to shield such a person but be firm and ensure the person seeks the help he/she needs.
This is a show of love.
Love will always want you to be the best and have the best you can get and not let you plunge into troubled waters while it watches you drown without lending a helping hand.
We cannot give what we don’t have which is why we must always check ourselves and be accountable for and to ourselves before daring to do  same for others.
May the week ahead bring us all peace and fulfilment.
Salaam!

r3d
12:35

#museyilnen  
#yararewa  
#northernstar  
#roadtorecovery #everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple #welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d

The Challenge
(Day 20)

Reject me
Despise me
Ridicule me
Dear foe
Compound my woes
I'm in the throes of a reckless abandon
Be merciless, be brutal, this slavery leads to freedom
Cast the first stone, lay the foundation
Let me feel the burning hate in your eyes melt the ice in my soul and start a fire inside
Tell me I won't amount to nothing, tell me I can never be easy on any eye
Say all the nasty things don't mince words, be precise
Hurt me, throw me out
I'd thrive on your rejection, let me strive alone
I need your rejection to be the cornerstone

r3d

#yararewa  
#northernstar  
#roadtorecovery #everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple #welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d

The Challenge
(Day 16)

I'm hungry! Famished! Starving and I don't wanna be satisfied.

I wanna always hunger for more

Yearn for more

Strive for more

Be more

Love some more

Forgive some more

Learn some more.


I hunger for more confidence

For prudence

For divine guidance

To lean on you alone.


I hunger to keep running after you

To bring to life that vision you gave to me

To inspire another

To try again

To breath again

To be great

And to in turn inspire another


I hunger to stand tall

To rise to higher heights after every fall

To look beyond the prison of my mind and to break down its walls

Walls of fear

Of pride, of anger, of hate

And to never get sated till this hunger becomes the death of me..


r3d

#yararewa
#northernstar
#roadtorecovery
#everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple
#welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d

The Challenge
(Day 14)

Come on in
Or get the hell out!

Don't stand in the doorway like a ****** footmat

Say you will
Or say you won't  Keep your "I just mights" to your self so we don't end up having a fight  
Say good morning,good afternoon or goodnight

Say the truth, oh please say it right
Don't lie beneath canopies of lies saying its diplomacy

Your indecision is a decision in itself
It's amusing you don't even know what you're about

Please get out and don't forget to shut the door on your way out!!

r3d

#yararewa  
#northernstar  
#roadtorecovery #everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple #welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d

You left before we could even begin,
A lig ht that shone bright but burnt out too fast leaving me behind in the dark

Ending the thought of a beginning,
Losing a war I thought I was winning.
a beginning whose end was no where in sight

With the words goodbye
I knew we had lost our last chance to try
Try to start
Before we part

You left and you left behind meaning
Meaning than hurts while it's healing

Healing old wounds and piercing through the vessel that blood pumps with a ******'s accuracy making its kills fast and painless

It must have been the way my being your eyes caressed

As your lips took mine in a communion of the unworthy but blessid

Watching you walk away
With the words our eyes held but our lips would dare not say

I knew you weren't going stray
Cause soon again, in your arms my head will find a place till my hairs turn gray..

r3d
16205

#museyilnen  
#yararewa  
#northernstar  
#roadtorecovery #everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple #welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d

Waking up from a sleepless night
Everything around looks just right
Heart's still holding on to you real tight
Head's light
Weary from the battle within
My spirit takes flight
Scared I would never win..

Still your silence screams
Still it feels like a dream
I wake up to type another good morning that never gets sent
I still write all the things I usually say to you when you were my friend

Do you ever pick your phone to dial my number
Then remember that maybe I like you won't pick up?
Do you have sleepless nights, yet dreams about me that mess you up?

This is the worse kind of heart ache
This is worse than a heartbreak
Oh wait!
It is and I guess that's why I've lost weight

I hunger for you attention
I thirst for your affection
I'm tortured by your gentle rejection
Save me, you are my salvation


r3d
17/8/16


#museyilnen  
#yararewa  
#northernstar  
#roadtorecovery #everythingipretendtobe #realrawandsimple #welearnasweteach
#writingright
#firesofr3d