it is time my friend
to put my thoughts
on paper...
to write you

what my tongue denies
what my heart screams
in the middle of the night

it is time to speak in
the words etched upon
my bones
to give light to this
seed with in my soul

even as the ink blots the paper
my fears rise, and my courage quivers
to give this entity the substance
of words

is to give it the power
of freedom or destruction
but I am weary, so weary
from carrying its burden
through this long peroid
of gestation, I am beyond
beyond trying to carry
this thing with grace
and have now become
a lumbering leviathan
treading heavily through
each day,not evolving
or creating, just barely exsisting

So, if it be freedom,
there will be relief
if it be destruction
there will be release

No more dallying,
No more delay

You left, You died

leaving us behind
no recompense
no answers
just a ***** room
and unpaid bills
You, You, walked
out of life,

without
finishing the conversation
without
any explanation
without
care for others
without
thought for self

You told us nothing
You hid your hurt
till it was to late
till...it..was..too..too late

And tho
I WILL LOVE YOU
til the end of my days

Now,  I  hate....

I hate you are not here
I hate that I did not see
I hate that you did not ask
I hate the incompleteness
of it all

So my friend, I write
this to you...
then make it into
a paper boat
that I set on
the waters
before
lighting
it afire
in
the hopes
it will
bring
freedom

GOING ABOUT ITS BUSINESS

'Oh wall! I'm amazed you haven't collapsed
under the weight of drivel you're holding up! '

the graffiti laughs
in self mockery.

'Happy the man who is sleeping with you
tonight.I'd be much happier if I were! '

another wall
mutters to itself jealously.

'You ask, beautiful girl
how many kisses I've snatched?
I've snatched these ones and...
I'm not the only one to do so.'

yet another wall
kisses 'n' tells
in a red on yellow voice.

In the silence
the wallls are shouting
(a babble of voices)          

Time is smiling.

'I came here.
Had a ****
- then I went home! '

another announced
in a who-gives-a-fk manner.

'Lucius is stuffing it
into Caesu's mouth

a drunken scrawl
pronounces

amongst the inns of
THE ELEPHANT...THE LITTLE EAGLE
THE MERCURY & APOLLO.

It is the 23rd
August

AD 79

Mount Vesuvius
hasn't yet exploded.

Pompeii
dozes

in the lazy sun
of this

new morning

going about
its business.



The Pompeian graffiti still exists in all its extraordinary ordinariness and just goes to show that humans will be humans no matter what peroid of history we come to rest in. Most of it could be...now. And it amazes me that their 'now' is little different than our 'now.' People will be people. It is the day before the explosion and Pompeii is just being Pompeii and hasn't yet stepped into the history that will surround and preserve it. How fragile we all are and life is and how alive and fluent are their voices. Only history is static.



This 'exchange' dug up from the long ago when time is history and myth combined is worth more than gold and the voices that come back could well be our own.

NOTHING CHANGES

In the lost city
of Ur

a fragment
survives

The father/son
divide.

The conversation is
a confrontaton.

startling in its simplicity.

Father: 'Where have you been? '

Son: 'Nowhere! '

Seems like there's nothing
new under the sun.

Nothing...
...changes.

***

THE STONES SPEAK IN A GRAFFITI VOICES

“You...have got me pregnant! ”

“You...are a mediocre man! ”

“I hope your ulcerous pustules
open and burn more than ever before! ”

An ordinary day
in Pompeii

then all is
forgotten

as Vesuvius
enters history.

i dont know what this is with us.
im not sure where it will go.
i just know i love the way you make me feel.
i am happy
i am whole
i am everything i need to be because of you.
i spent a long time drowning and you taught me how to breathe again
you may not know this but you had saved me from myself and the idea that i am not worth nothing.
i had lost myself a long time ago
you are helping me bring me back
and all you are doing is being you
you walked into my life and my heart torn down my walls and lit my soul like it belongs to you
i may not get to see you as often as i like
i may not get to hold you although the night
but my heart wont let you go
i thought i had lost you with everything that happen
that thought torn me apart
i know it had only been a short peroid of time
and maybe im the only one who is feeling this way
i cant wait to see what is in store for us
you make me want to do better
some one you can be proud of.
i want to thank you for bringing this heart of mine back alive
i want to thank you for caring
and for ******* me good
for letting us have more then just *** between us
even if im not sure what it is
i want to thank you for being here
i know i can count on you