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petalsx Aug 2013
This year I have met a boy.
I havent met him for the first time.
I mean I already knew him.
Then I began to learn more about him.
He really made my heart skip.
Im not too sure how to explain how I exactly feel about him, but in my head it is much more easier to justify.
It all really started in the cafeteria, then in english class.
english class was my favorite class because of him.
he would stare at me and it would make me feel insecure.
his kisses stole all the air out of my lungs and his lips were as sweet enough to give me goosebumps all over my body.
when he holds me i reach for his hand so i can hold him too.
when i hold him i burry my face into his shirt and i try to study his heart beat.
he became my talk all night boyfriend and now i guess, my only friend i feel like i have.
sometimes we argue and it kills me.
but now when he looks at me i feel so much more secure
and now when i hold him i feel as close to him as his heart beat.
he taught me that its okay to love and not be scared about it. i think thats so beautiful of him
and i do love him
once i had so many fears,
the only fear i have now is losing him.
he keeps me sane.
i love every part about him and one day i hope to love more things about him.
i forgot to metion,
i hated him one year with all my guts
now i love him with all my heart. ugh,
the irony.
Mateuš Conrad Jun 2018
/i tend to don sunglasses,
encompassing the night...


never the aggravated
             youth,
as made pardonable...
into a circumstance
        of hardly gagging for death:


double whammy,
to cirumstance mortality:
     you engage with
teenagers,
     and you're not experienced
to deal wiht them...

and then you metion:
           a death wish...
and they run away,
given the fact that you've
bought them an excess of
$6 worth of *****?

                now you're *******
me off pdf. contra jpeg.
formatting!
                no, seriously!
there's an actual reason
why, to the 20th century
writers will never, ever,
become "too" apparent...  

    these ******* never had
to deal with clinical
insomnia?
     the merger of
dreams, thoughts,
and death,
  suddenly made synonymous
with a thesaurus
scrutiny...

                 i died
to the account of thrice...
what little you do will do
just as little for
me to encompass
understanding the random,
or the average....
  
get my drift?!

    no?!
                güt!

            auch nein unß
                sich kümmern!
                        gegeben dies!

seems i was quiet
the effective / necessary
                        cognitive artefact...
more the titilating abel,
rather than the baß(e)-on cain
in terms of employment...

                the ******-sort...
           wizard-quasi...
                         a major projection
of a HA..
                  a necro-"philia"
   assertetive of one only being
able to bias eating pork,
having stomached
   ingesting
                 the leeches
and clinging artefacts
                   of Poseidon's
domain!
          
                           well ****, me!

the bellitling surmount
that people could attest to!
and there they go,
off, on their own ownership
off on a tangent,
  like exhibiting the character
of a vector...
          well i didn't
go to university to study
psyche, that's for sure...

   i was about to embark
on sustaining pop culture
by rekindling the imitation
ending in the sigma that
became: toothpaste / shampoo...

shame a sense of
romance strated to wrestle with me...
teasing Cain...
    i'd still overt:
in escaping the night
with exercising a Plantagenet
"right" of utilising
      sunglasses... esp. inclusive
of doing so, by the "consequence"
of experiencing the night...
          
    i solved one teenager confrontation
by telling them:
  you call your uncle, sure...
problem is... you see...
          i have a... death wish:
******* could out-run usain bolt...
quicker than an *******!
shame that's not even
   moderately corrective
   of the life i inhibit...
                  rather than fake:
in the cruel reality of having to inhabit,
   ex omni exemplum: quare ipsum?
if this is bad latin,
then i certaily shouldn't have
asked my anesthetist prior to being
admistered to the hands of a german "butcher"
pulling my wisdom teeth out:
                     quo vadis?
long sleep, within the confines
of an anesthetic: requires,
                       this simple question'
death-anticipatory... just in case
someone forgot the ontology of mortality;
thank-**** death being
                     hardly "the" surprise!

— The End —