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Rozalia Aug 2018
Can you hear that?
that awkward silence
between you and your anxiety?
the void and the nonsensical
voices in your head?

Does it not make you feel dead?
I mean
Is it not sad how the people who
always wanna see you happy are
the reason why you're unhappy?
now our hearts are loose and flappy
Falling in love is too high of a price
I fell in love with poetry i guess
that's all i can afford

But Lately I Dont Say Much
these days you don't get what
you give
the world keeps on demanding
it only leads to grief
they keep telling me that my life
is crowded with people who will
stab me in the back with a knife
I know thats betrayal, but what
happened to loyalty? Or
perhaps I did not get briefed

I can still hear the silence
between me and them
the fakes, the jealous, the evil society
how do I handle this
do I even make it a priority?
I offered them masks cause their
character is constantly changing
They keep wondering how am I
Managing
All the pressure, the pain and the tragedies
Little do they know that there is no
strategy
I stay shut lately - I dont say much
I do not mix emotions with
devotion what do you call such?
I stay quite I stay woke
please do not provoke

Lately I Don't Say Much
I roll a dice and gamble with your life
but if oneday I decide to speak up
it will probably be too late for you to
hear me out because I would have
already cut you out of my life

But Lately I do not say nor do much

-Liaa
Rozalia Jul 2018
Dear Somebody Worth It

I write this barefooted
freely and open minded
no rhymes no foot prints
no sense but quite dense
with much appreciation
I still lack plenty of love
I feel provoked and evoked
by long lost memories
I feel revoked, by what we call
"mokes"

this so called "black" society
doing nothing good but constraining
the young "mokes", ridiculous!
what do we call this? anxiety?
unfortunately no matter how many times
we wear a mask and fake our smiles
no support denotes our true feelings
but this is life - let us not promote
depression, but suppression instead
With the true intentions of making
this world a better vacation

Dear Somebody Worth It
Stop breaking our hearts just
because you're broken inside
Let us not play games, let us grow
let us glow, let us be bold
Life's too short for shenanigans
May your broken heart repair
and sparkle in gold

Yours Truly

-Liaa
Rozalia Mar 2019
The Pleasure Of A Heartbreak

I hope you are happy
Knowing that you're the reason
Behind someone's heartache
It's sad how we choose not to
recognize love, yet we are too quick
To act like Stevie Wonder when true
love is not even blind

But I would like to thank you
Through this pain you've caused
You've also brought me pleasure
I guess this is what they meant when
They said "everything happens for a
reason"
I'm all grown now, I stand in love
We don't fall now, We stand in love

I'm sorry if I make you feel like
I am nothing without you
For you've made something out of
me
With all the pain you've caused,
you've also brought me pleasure
While you were out seeking sweet
nothing's, I became someone else's
treasure

I hope the truth manifests within you
I hope the day we meet, we'll be able
To speak the same language, fluently
Most importantly I hope that you don't
think that this poem is for you or about you
Perpetrators aren't supposed to feel this special

Through this pain you've caused
You've also brought me pleasure
And I Stan, because you made a fool
Not out of me, but out of you.

-Liaa
Rozalia Dec 2019
You Are Not Entitled
   
    It hurts to a point where you
    Can no longer feel pain anymore
    You get used to disappointments
    It starts becoming a bore
    It cuts deep to the core
    Knowing that you're not
    Entitled to someone you've
    Loved so dearly
   
    You let them show you twice
    That they don't want you
    You felt entitled it only lead to
    Depression
    You lost yourself in the process of
    Fixing your so called lover who was
    Broken by someone else
    How's that your mission to accomplish?
    Don't you see the bigger vision?
   
    I mean you deserve the entitlement
    That will fight for you, nothing less
    You're not entitled to being someone else's second best
    You're entitled to receiving love that can
    Never be replaced, but embraced
    You deserve the type of warmth that will
    Heal your unseen scars that you claim
    Were caused by a cat's aggression
    On your wrist
    An entitlement that won't make you feel
    Like you're at war with yourself
   
    You're not entitled to attention that seeks
    You only when it's lonely
    That boy is not worth it, that girl ain't either
    Stay away from self petty, redeem from being phony

    Entitlement can come with extravagant
    gifts and sincere efforts, but it can also come with extreme grief and
Counterfeited apologies
    Entitlement can be the reason why
    you're happy or sad
   
    But you're not entitled to a wish
    that might never be fulfilled
   
    Liaa
Rozalia Dec 2019
You've left me so miserable
With all these life challenges
I am unable to continue wearing this mask
I'm expected to be this happiest, craziest
Child in this so called family
I think I might be losing my sanity

Whenever she's around I'm at my lowest
How am I supposed to cope?
I'm tired of faking everything
How did you even allow heaven to take
You away from me when you were all I had?
I wish you took your phone with
So I could communicate with you
But who am I kidding, what I'm asking
For will never be legal

I thought time was supposed to heal wounds
But instead I'm incredibly bruised
Inside out and in every way possible
I thought everyone deserved a second shot
At everything but why were you denied one?

This life thing isn't for me
Premeditated ****** on my mind
Twenty-four-seven
But I think dying in my sleep would
Be less painful

Listen
I hope you can see my eyes glitter like
crystal
I hope you can hear me lie to these humans
When they ask me if I'm okay and I tell them
"it's just tears of joy"
I hope you can feel the demons I'm surrounded
By at night
I hope you understand why I'm tired,
extremely drained of having to fight
With inner demons

And trust me when I say I wanna
break up with my anxiety
It been a long term relationship
But it lacks plenty of love
I'm depressed, I say this with pride.
My scars will never heal for as long as
I'm alive.

Come back and take me with.

-Liaa
Rozalia Apr 2020
It's the saddest hours of the morning
And of course, I feel sad
I feel so much anger I might be a
Danger to myself
If it was up to me I'd pack all the
Type of emotions I'm feeling on a shelf
Just so you could comprehend what I'm going through
Pure melancholy, I preach to you
Not sure if I feel
Lonely or if I'm indeed alone

If I were to leave, forever tonight
I'd regret one thing
Don't ask me what, as it is not worthy
of knowing
I'm drowning, deeply in my sorrows
It's as if my heart's being pierced with
A sharp arrow

If you asked me, I'm not coping at all
But I still smile, to ease the conflict
between my heart and my mind
I take the deepest breathes just to keep sane
I avoid escaping to my mysterious world
To avoid being called insane
I can handle whatever that comes
My way

But I refuse to stay happily unhappy.

-Liaa

— The End —