Dear First Love,
With all my heart, i can truly say i love you. U will never know how much you mean to me. You have made me smile, and you have made me cry, but through it all my love never died. I never knew i would fall so hard, but i will say i dont regret it at all. Ive grown to love everything about you. From your curly hair, to ur freckles, to the tip of your toes. You've impacted my life in so many ways. I dont know if you know how much i appreciate you. Thanks for all the times i needed you, and you were actually there. Thanks for pushing me to go get my permit, giving me the hope that a job would finally come my way and being there when i needed to vent on some tough times i was going through. I couldnt ask for anything more. I hope i did my job in being there for you when you needed me. I tried my best in being perfect just for you. First love, just know together or not i will always love you, and every moment your thinking of me, im thinking of you too. Our realationship has been tough. Really tough i might add. But its brought me so much happiness in spite of all the crazy drama. Theres memories weve made that i will never forget (smiling while writing). My favorite memory was the first time i really started to like you. Sitting in the car holding hands just listening to music. You creeped your little self into my heart that day. Ever since ive never been able to go a day without thinking of you. Remember when we used to go ice skating, or when we raced at mcdonalds, or when we used to write poetry about each other all the time. Lol. I swear we communicated better through poetry then words back then. I always understood you more though your poems. Another memory i can never forget was December 25th. Great day. First the present with all the wrapping paper then the movies. Then you asked me to be your girlfiend. I was so shocked i couldnt believe it. I swear that was the happiest day for me.I remember my exact feeling. I remember thinking to myself woow, hes really mines now, all ive ever wanted, the guy ive always wanted to be with, i loved you then and there, just couldnt say the words. We hadnt gotten to that stage yet. But there came a day i knew with every inch of my body that i was in love with you. I couldnt help it. You were just perfect to me even through your wrong doing. I fell in love with the Eric that loved to hug and hold me, the one that knew i was what he wanted so faught for me, the guy that tried to make things better right after he messed up. That was my first love. The Eric that tried. Im just waiting for him to come back. I miss him so much. I havent seen him for a while but i know hes still there. I hope one day, when your ready for love the right way, that i will still be there. Ill be waiting for now. Ive always had hope in us. We still have more memories to create, prom, dances, ocean city, maybe paris lol. I cant wait and i hope that we one day comeback to enjoy those days together. But for now. I must let you go, because my heart is hurting and i dont know how much more i can take. Ill always be there for you first love, i promise, i just hope one day youll be ready for me and my love. I love you so much Eric Martin! Your my heart.
Sincerly Mariah
P.S. forever my little freckleface
