"fakest" poems
We've known each other for long
But still, you can't say a thing
That would define me
What's that spark you see?
Well, I don't know
You have no clue what lives inside my guts
No way you could see within
So why are you still here, wondering who's under the skin?
I don't want you to get ***** finding out who I am
Coz there's a lot of **** inside my head
And much more ***** in my heart, both can't be replaced
No point in cleaning it up, trust me I've tried many times before
And I don't really need you
To see the mess
People around me have done
Coz you've helped them too
I'm sorry that it's true
And there is no cure for me
So don't try to find it
Or else, regrets will hunt me down
Because you've wasted your time not only
On me, but on my issues, too
How many times have you cried because of me?
How many times you wished you were dead
Because your feelings were accepted but not given back?
Tell me, I'll listen before I go, disappear on the quiet bubbly road
There's bulimia in me, I figured it out
Vomiting feelings I've once accepted, not able to answer them
And now giving them back in the nastiest way possible
Covered in dark bubbles, smelling like death
And I would kneel by the toilet
Throwing up all the things I didn't mean
But said with a smile, hoping you'll be glad
Because we are friends, right?
It leaves bitter taste that stays for days
And I can't help but think
Why do they try to see the darkest part
Where everything is messy and covered in blood
Examination of my fakest smiles leads them to realization
There's something wrong with my heart
And I appreciate that you care, yet
I'm sick of it
I can't handle feelings of others and
That drives me insane, needing more shots
So I could spit all the mess out from my mouth and get rid of it
You really are there when I need
Thanks about that by the way
But you can't heal a bulimian heart
That's sick of all this attention that
You're giving me
It's not your fault, it's just me
Knowing people who get too much attached to me
Will get hurt
So my brain starts fighting against it, leaving my heart with a message
Don't let them in and if you do
Get them out like stomach does
When it can't handle the food
Don't play it nice
Still, I can't help
But don't want to hurt you
Yet you're difficult
So now I'm standing here
Saying these words I've made up
Of what I threw up
Jul 13, 2018
Jul 13, 2018 at 11:44 AM UTC
You were the only one who was ever real
I couldn't wrap my head around it quite as well as I could wrap myself around you
But it's all close enough
Have you ever lost something real?
I'm not quite sure how this will feel
Because even the fake ones hurt sometimes
Even the fakest ones can leave you wrapped in a dark cloud with no silver lining visible
I wonder what your real storm will bring
When you finally decide to destroy me in your path
A full on massacre of sorts
I'm sure
I'm sure the pain will be just as real as you were
As this was
Is
I'm sure
Jan 21, 2015
Jan 21, 2015 at 5:23 AM UTC
...centipedes underneath big rocks in the dirt.
...worms on the pavement in the rain.
...rotting roadkill you drove over today.
...maggots writhing inside of dead brains.
...rainbows in great puddles of oil.
...fakest person you'll ever ******* meet.
...weeds and crabgrass polluting the soil.
...reason I hate humanity.
...nightmares preventing your sleep.
...dreams making your knees weak.
...scab you can't stop picking.
...ulcer you can't stop licking.
...spider in the bathroom sink.
...shakes you get if you don't drink.
...doubt whispering inside your mind.
...lies you've been fed all your life.
Apr 11, 2015
Apr 11, 2015 at 5:59 PM UTC
2am and up with the night
That’s what feels right
Also where I feel alone
Still no home
The night consumes me
Stuck in this undertow
So now I tip toe
Around everything I’ve become
Or the things I’m not
I forgot the meaning of sleep
These eyes could tell you that
Bloodshot and dead
I’ve got a heart to match
And a soul to clash
Just a bad night
Like all the rest
Dare you to quit fighting back
Your legs gave in
So the throne gave out
They’ll tear it down
Brick by boring brick
Stick by broken stone
“It’ll be fine”
What a hand-me-down lie
Cause I am not okay
This is not alright
I can see the end
And you’re the fakest **** friend
Falling down on my face
Can’t look anyone in the eyes
******* disgrace
Or myself in the mirror
Going on 7 years bad luck
Forgive the self pity
I’m just pessimistic
With a missing characteristic
Who has time for feeling sorry?
The truth is I’m tired
And sick of fighting
Cause it’s the same old story
Make it from one bad night to the next
But every single one feels hexed
We all have them
The nights you barely survive
Praying I make it out alive
Whether it’s saints or sinners
No one’s ever a winner
Somewhere between angels and demons
While you’re speaking about a hell you don’t believe in
Against a heaven that’s only promised freedom
Maybe you should ask for wisdom
I’m just asking to be saved
Never coming back unscathed
What doesn’t **** you makes you stronger
I’d like to think they’ve made me brave
Nov 3, 2015
Nov 3, 2015 at 3:52 PM UTC
My want was not even her,
My want is just dear love,
From a lovely peaceful dove.
My need was not to have care,
My need is to be loved truly,
From the sweetest life partner.
My wish was not the fakest egoistic girl,
My wish is a good mature young love,
From someone who deserves all my love.
My desire was never a **** girl,
My desire is a long-term love,
From the lady most trustworthy.
My hunger was not a ******
My hunger was the truth,
From that angel most surreal.
Oct 22, 2016
Oct 22, 2016 at 1:33 AM UTC
Your laugh.
The big one.
The loud one.
The "I'm at home laugh."
Not the quiet, public laugh;
the polite titter for
dinner with aquantances.
I want the big throated, down deep laugh.
I want your breathless whispers against my neck.
I want one of those hugs you give me when you mean it. The desperate embrace.
I want minutes. All of them... to soak up the seconds as the thirsty are nourished by dewdrops.
I will love all of the sadness and uncertainy and anxiety.
These are minutes too.
I wish I'd been better, sooner.
I've loved you so much for so long it feels like all of the love that ever was
Over the course
Of forever.
I love you so much that I wish I had a unique word.
A language singularity
that was only for you.
A word that I didn't have to share with shampoo commercials and free lunches and other people.
I (______) you with all my heart. Know that. On this, the fakest of all holidays,
Tha one that you hate the most,
Please know that I ( _____ ) you.
Feb 14, 2016
Feb 14, 2016 at 3:44 PM UTC
You know what would look great on the library wall?
Maybe, perhaps, a wrecking ball.
Who needs real books when we have the internet and e-readers?
Who needs live action plays when we have movie theaters?
Are you wondering why there isn't any shade in the park?
We needed to fill the playground with shavings of bark.
Who needs ideas when we have technological omnipotence?
Who needs a savior when we can be saved by our ignorance?
If you're shaking your head, let it be in a mirror,
until the mantra of this generation becomes clearer and clearer.
Consume. Materialize. Deceive. Repeat.
Gain it all for ourselves, it's Mother Nature's treat!
You don't have to believe our intent is for peace or procreation,
in order to confess you've contributed to the world's condemnation.
We were made to be stewards and by sharing, will thrive
if not in this world where the fittest [and fakest] survive.
Feb 11, 2015
Feb 11, 2015 at 10:02 PM UTC
It's amazing how people **** you over.
You put all your trust into them, and they show you they don't deserve it.
It's amazing that the realist experiences are with the fakest of friends.
It's amazing that people can be the best and worst things that ever happen to you.
It's amazing that at the end of the day, it all comes to an end. There's nobody you can really trust, except yourself.
Everyone loses. Nobody wins.
-d.y.
Mar 31, 2014
Mar 31, 2014 at 6:08 PM UTC
I missed the scorching,
burning
screaming in my throat...
But it's like a big red button
an on switch
with no off.
I started something that I don't know how to stop
And now I'm sitting on the bathroom floor typing this up
silently crying
waiting for the next time this volcano will erupt.
I've missed the cold of the porcelain
the whispers of mia:
my fakest friends
reminding me of the stretch marks
forming on my skin
the disgusting nagging coming from within
I'm supposed to be getting better...
I don't want to lie to you...
But I don't want to.
Feb 25, 2015
Feb 25, 2015 at 2:26 AM UTC
I am a poet they say
I write about the emotions and all the things I can’t say
I am a poet they say
When life gets hard I move my pen and free the pain away
I am a poet they say
A poet that writes about love and hate at the same day
I am a poet they say
And you are the curse that will never go anyway
I am a poet they say
I hate my love to you in every single way
I am a poet they say
I write things about you as if I’m writing about my enemy
I am a poet they say
I believe in you even though you’re the fakest fantasy
I wish you could just liberate me
Because in the end
I am just a poet
Yet to you
I am the lover who could not stay away
Sep 17, 2019
Sep 17, 2019 at 1:36 PM UTC
Wearing the fakest smile just to hide the pain,
I know that you feel it everyday,
I’m sorry it hurts, but life just happens that way,
I know it could **** you, but please just lose the fear,
It’d go real easy if you just shed it like tears,
How can’t you see that you’re still alive,
Even if you feel dead inside,
Don’t worry baby I could heal your wounds,
If you’d just let me really see you,
I could heal you,
And I’ll try to,
I could fix you,
If you want me to,
It may seem scary,
What I’ll have to do,
Baby I could heal you,
But who's going to save me?
Who's going to fix me?
You want to but you just can't,
I'll already be gone.
Jan 29, 2016
Jan 29, 2016 at 12:36 PM UTC
with my feet on the ground
and my head in the clouds
I try to survive this trip stepping around
every stranger in the strange crowds
dreamers have no place in this world
so my heart fights my day job habits
my creativity shot from cannons is hurled
while I run down holes chasing white rabbits
have I lost my mind?
where was it before I asked?
did all the drugs politely turn down all the questions of my kind?
did every line of coke spell answers to my lifelong pain masked?
with my tie on to make a dollar
I can shake your hand with the fakest of faces
but the relief I need to loosen the collar
always leaves little strung out traces
but isn't life made to never count one person?
isn't that why we marry and breed?
so we have misery's company as the days worsen
and an excuse for the green bill greed
you think I fear the conference room meeting?
I'm more afraid of Captain Hook
because as I grow down I realize the stories
were precious distractions from all the beatings I took
**** you wear my life for a day and try to endure the hurt
I've learned the pain killers that go down like spoonfuls of sugar
I've learned to suture when the blood spurts
and the bars and friends with compliments will always be my pushers
so with feet on the ground where the killers carry all the keys
I keep my head above all that's you spell out as real
and I'll never take another **** on my knees
because the pushers and the wonderlands make sure I never have to feel
May 21, 2014
May 21, 2014 at 1:08 PM UTC
/~~\
fakest of the fakes.
tell me a story.
about reality
and unreality.
\~~/
Dec 17, 2012
Dec 17, 2012 at 8:56 PM UTC
The sight of you,
will always do,
your smile it fills my soul,
it takes away,
the grayest day,
it fills every void and hole.
I don't know why I'm frightened,
The days you end up gone.
I'm the only one to notice,
When my sun ain't there at dawn.
From secrets heard,
told from a bird,
I feel that I am losing.
I'll grip the streams,
and angry screams,
for you I'll take a bruisin'.
I thought that I could have you,
Keeps me here alive.
That there's no one here but us two,
Keeps my forward drive.
The thought of you,
is always nice,
In my mind I do percieve:
A person who,
is just so great,
that no one would believe.
It seems like I am shaking,
Not sure if I want to know.
If you are what I ache for,
Or if it was an illusion,
The fakest kind of glow.
Jul 6, 2011
Jul 6, 2011 at 12:29 PM UTC
My mother is the wisest women that I know and for me she has a vacant heart.
And she always told me that the nice girls are the best ones at breaking hearts.
From the past I kno that she's right and that's the crazy part.
I guess that's why it came with a disguise and it kinda had a shaky start.
The bond gets closer and he likes it that's another crazy part.
Yet that same past still got this boy replacing parts.
She knows the truth about it all so he can't help but play the part.
Most his friends know he ain't never really played the "baby"part.
But that ain't how it started it actually had a crazy part.
But how it started and how it is, the crazy start not even the shaky part.
But while it lasts they both gon play they part.
His main concern is this not ending in breaking hearts.
"She loves me she loves not" I got a flower breaking parts.
I'm so close to her I'd be **** if we break apart.
But it's just love holding us togehter and sometimes I think she gon break the part.
Yet her words make me feel like she doesn't kno how to fake the part.
And puttin all my trust into a women besides moms is the fakest thought.
I should do it for her or at least make the start.
Hopefully that don't rock the boat cuz I wouldn't wanna shake the arc.
Once you cut to deep you can't erase the scars but the perfect picture is in creation so don't erase the art.
Oct 27, 2010
Oct 27, 2010 at 12:45 PM UTC
His hands were so soft,
I never thought I’d be able to hold them.
His eyes were so sweet,
they were captivating like a bright gem.
His smile was so tired,
it was one of the fakest smiles ever.
He’s so out of reach,
but my time with him felt like forever.
Apr 28, 2019
Apr 28, 2019 at 10:03 PM UTC
Loving you from a far
was beautiful
Until I loved you up close
that was ugly.
I was under false pretenses
thinking you
were different
you weren't
You've showed me
the fakest love
I'll ever know.
And I fell for it
And I'm still falling
for your
false love.
Dec 3, 2017
Dec 3, 2017 at 9:39 PM UTC
So ... What do you see ... ?
when ... you look at yourself ... ?
Do you see an ... " Image " ... ?
or a ... " Picture of Health " ... ?
or the ...
" Fakest " ... of people
who'd rather see ... " Wealth " ... ?
Dunno bout' ... you ... ?
but ...
I see ... A Brother ...
who's from a ... " Hard School " ... !!!
A school of ... " Hard Knocks " ...
Surrounded by ..... " FOOLS " ..... !!!!!!
Some ... who've been drowned ...
in this ... " Western Whirlpool " ... !!!!
See ... it's easy to blame
My Problems on ... " Colour " ...
but these days ... I feel ...
like ... problems i've got ...
come from sisters and brothers ...
who live for ... " THEMSELVES " ...
REGARDLESS ... of colour ... !!!!!
But ....
DON'T ... Get Me Wrong ... !!!
being black ... can be ... TOUGH ... !!!!!
cos' ...
white folks just ... " Use Us " ...
and place us ... " In Cuffs " ...
But ....
People are People ... !!!
Some Blacks ... do the stuff ...
that leads me to ... " Thinking " ...
Some blacks ...
You ... CAN'T TRUST ... !!!!!
" Ashes to Ashes " ...
or ... " Dust to Dust " ...
when I look at myself ...
Sometimes ... I just ... CUSS ... !!!
Why am I ... in this form ... ?!?
Why am I ... not the norm ... ?!?
and ...
What's with these ... " Racists " ... ???
who wish I .... " Wasn't Born " .... ?!?!?
Is what you see ... REAL ... ???
or ... do you ... "conceal" ...
The Truth ... from yourself ...
While you eat ...
" Wagon Wheels " ... !?!?!
That line ...
Was a ... Joke ... !!!
But .....
That verse ... " Provokes " ...
A .... " REALITY CHECK " ...
for ... ALL of you folks ... !!!
This here ... is a poem ...
That's Searching for ... TRUTH ...
So ...
Are you ... " Pretentious " ... ?
or .... Are you just ... YOU ... ?
and ....
What does that mean ... ?!?
Can you ... DEFINE YOU ... !?!
or ...
Are you a ... " Victim " ... ?
Redundant of ... PROOF ...
that ...
What you ... " Believe " ...
Confirms you as ... TRUE ... !!!!!
TRUE ... in your actions
TRUE ... in your thoughts
TRUE ... in the luxuries
that you have ... sought ... ???
See ...
These are the questions
" WE ALL " ... have to face ... !!!
But ... do you face them ... ?
in the ... " Cold Light of Day " ... ?
Or ...
Do you see them ... ?
But Still ........ "shy away" ...
Then ... jump on a train ...
for a ... " Quick " ... away day ...
But ....
That's NOT ... The Ticket ... !!!
These are ... " Poetic Lines " ...
with ... No Need to ... " Picket " ... !!!
It's ... PAINFUL ... I know ...
to ... " Spiritually " ... go ...
to the ... " Depth of " ...
..... " Your Psyche " .....
Without some ... " New Nikes " ... !!!
Are you laughing ... " Politely ... ?
or maybe ... you might be ... ?
Listening ........ silently ...................
cos' that line ... just might be ... ?
PIERCING .... " Your Psyche " ....
You ...
Don't ... have to like me ...
I'm ... " Used to that now " ...
But ... Liking Yourself ...
is ... " What I'm About " ... !!!
cos' ...
If you like ... YOU ... !!!
You'll like ... " Others Too " ... !!!
and this will ..... " Pass on " ...........
to those who have ... " Youth " ...
cos' they ...
NEED ... " THE TRUTH " ...
to make the right moves ...
and then ... " Our Society " ...
Might just .... IMPROVE .... !!!!
A poem ... like this ...
can cover ... So Much ...
Not just ....
" Such and Such " ...
But ...
" Deep-Rooted " ... FEARS ... !!!
We ... ALL ... Need To Touch ... !!!
Like ....
What's ... REALLY ... in you ?
What's ... REALLY ... in me ?
How ... doing these things ...
can ... set our minds ... FREE ... !!!
FREE of ........ Constraints ....
That ... " Control " ... how we be ...
FREE ... to create ...
A world ... " Full of Peace " ...
" Freedom " ... to greet ...
EVERYBODY ... we meet ...
from ... London to Paris ...
to ... " Sesame Street " ...
Now ...
This ... " Final Verse " ...
Should ... make this ... COMPLETE ... !!!
Be ... TRUE TO YOURSELF ... !!!
Be ... REAL WITH YOURSELF ... !!!
ACCEPT .... in yourself ....
The cards ... You Have Dealt ... !!!
and when you've done this ...
Take a ... " Look at Yourself " ...
and ...
If you feel ... FREE ... !!!
Have a ... " Smile to Yourself " ... !!!!!
" Stretch Out " ...
Like A .... TREE .... !!!
Be ... Who You Be ...
for .... ETERNITY .... !!!!!!
and this ...
I am ... Hoping ... ???
will make you ... HAPPY ... !!!
Then ... REMEMBER ME ... !!!
The Brother ... BIG V ...
and ... REMEMBER ... This Piece ...
Called ......
" What Do You See ? "
Apr 13, 2015
Apr 13, 2015 at 5:24 PM UTC
_i love you-_
knowing more than I should;
more than myself would,
of all past loves— that I could,
...so what's more of me to prove,
with only less of myself to lose?
i've tasted doom—
of heartbreak in it's gloom;
i've been swept by love— and broke it's broom,
...so what's more of me to prove,
with only less of myself to lose?
do as you'd like to assume—
dress for the occasion; in fakest love's costumes,
it won't do you good— the sweet scent; dims of it's perfume,
...so what's more of me to prove,
with only less of myself to lose.
for shall we gain—
all the sweetest nothing’s sooth;
be passionate of two youths,
go dancing in the rain— without shoes,
...i'll have nothing to prove, less to lose,
but in truth.. i shall always have you.
Feb 26, 2022
Feb 26, 2022 at 12:53 PM UTC
He planted a garden in my heart for all eyes to see.
He planted kisses on my face, amplifying that he's with me.
He watered down my fears with the scent of his calogne.
If you asked me I'd tell you 'He'll never leave me alone.'
And for a while he kept his promise and stayed by my side.
But after a while the roses wilted and the flowers began to die.
Now I'm stuck with the weeds of his love spreading in my veins.
Being watered by my tainted blood flowing through their streams.
But my fear is not this poison that spreads through me everyday.
Because I'm more terrified of his smile, that won't even look my way.
And he'll be there, loving her, the girl that took my place.
While I stand around with the fakest smile plastered on my face.
And that boy that promised he'd love me forever, just decided to leave.
Now here I am, left with a garden of poison and I can barely breathe.
Aug 22, 2015
Aug 22, 2015 at 1:37 PM UTC
When you see him, don't be surprised when he doesn't notice you
You see, He used to believe in wishing stars
He used to believe in the magic of the moon
He used to believe in the words of love
He used to believe in love
But a something or someone broke his heart and left him for granted
Now, his smiles are the fakest ones
His heart crushed into a million pieces
So when you see him, don't be surprised when he doesn't notice you fast
Instead, be there for him
Hug him and if he lets go, hug him again tighter
If he runs away, chase him over and over again
Make him see that in every "I love you" there is pain but there is also happiness
You have to make him believe in wishing stars
You have to make him believe in the magic of the moon
You have to make him believe in the words of love again
You have to make him believe in love
Love him, and he will love you back
Never give up
Apr 15, 2017
Apr 15, 2017 at 11:08 PM UTC
I ask questions
I can mind my business
My nose has strong sent
That doesn't mean I have to hunt for realist
...
Some people make the realist prohibit
So models are manikins now
The category of the fakest description
...
Checking phones
To see who's on
Hiding things from people who try to stay for very long
Never spoke words of it
Until they dead and gone
Hearing heart beat going slow
Like its a controlled metronome
...
I mean
Getting stab by a friend
Now a days seems cool
Even getting shot
And to live you had to hide
So i hid in water
And start drowning in a pool
Not knowing what to do
....
Every step I take makes wonder if I can trust you too
Apr 26, 2017
Apr 26, 2017 at 1:48 PM UTC
I’d prefer devastation
To this desolation
I’d rather feel it all
Than to feel this empty
No tears left, no screams
Just the fakest smile that
Gets me through the day
Till I’m home
And I’m blank
Jan 12, 2024
Jan 12, 2024 at 8:29 PM UTC
It’s the happiest people
That are often the saddest
It’s in the quietest places
Our screams are the loudest
It’s on the sunniest days
The dark depression rolls in
It’s in the deepest waters
We find out we can’t swim
It’s from the ones we love most
We try our best to hide
And it’s through the fakest smiles
We tell white little lies
No matter how hard
I continue to try
I can never repress
The self-loathing inside
May 9, 2019
May 9, 2019 at 3:28 PM UTC